Happy Friday Friends!
I hope & trust this post finds you having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn on the Texas Gulf Coast! The weather has been beautiful, our like 5 days of fall we get all year when the temperatures are in the high 60's, low 70's...for those in the Northeast & Midwest - it's all about perspective! :)
Earlier this week I heard a comedian speaking on the radio. He was talking about how ridiculous dreams are. He went on to explain that so many people miss living today, in the present moment, because we are so busy thinking about and waiting for our dreams to come true. As a guy who routinely encourages people to chase the dreams they treasure in their hearts it really got me to thinking. I understood his point.
For many years I had the privilege of serving others as a football coach. I didn't really know why, I just knew I wanted to try to make a difference in a kids life. I then went into intercollegiate athletic administration. I didn't really know why, I just knew I wanted to make a difference in a whole bunch of kids & coaches lives. And then God put me in time out. I went through a season of life that some might think was a negative however for me it was transformative. I took a job that to all the world made perfect sense - I must be clear here...God gave me signs that it was not right however I ran right through those stop signs! - however within 8 months I realized I was in the wrong place and then it took another 3 months to actually find a new job. It was during this time, a time I spent a ton of time with God reflecting on my life, who I am, what I believe, why I do what I do, etc. that I found my "Why".
Simon Sinek champions the idea of "Start with Why." On the website, startwithwhy.com, it says, "Everyone has a why. Why do you get up in the morning? Why does your organization exist? Your Why is the purpose, cause or belief that inspires you to do what you do. When you think, act and communicate starting with Why, you can inspire others."
Simon also came up with the idea of the Golden Circle. It is a three ring circle with Why? in the inner circle, How? in the middle circle and What? in the outer circle. Here is what they stand for:
Why? - Why do you do what you do?
How? - How do you do what you do?
What? - What do you do?
So let me bring this back in real personal. During my "time out" I realized that I really do believe that every persons life has value, meaning and purpose. I had also encountered hundreds, perhaps thousands, of people who did not see the value, meaning & purpose of their own lives and thus, were not living them. It broke my heart...praying, "God, please break my heart for what breaks yours" really does work. I realized I had found my Why. Shortly thereafter I had clarity of why I truly believe the purpose placed me on this earth - to encourage, empower & equip others to become the best they are capable of becoming as they pursue their life purposes. This is my How? So What do I do? I intentionally get up very early every morning and read my Bible & then a leadership book - I must first encourage, empower & equip myself before I can even think about doing the same for others. I then write my Beautiful Bride and 3 Tender Warriors a note. After doing this I look for quotes & scriptures, usually led by a word or thought I read in my Bible or leadership book, that I then share on Twitter & Facebook. After doing this I go to the gym to workout and pray. One of the things I regularly pray is that I will see things with spiritual eyes, that God will continually break my heart for what breaks His. That I will not see people as they are but as they could be. That I will see the brokenness, hurt and love them and accept them where they are. I offer a word of encouragement whenever I can...and always a smile, to everyone. I do life with people. They call, I answer. They have a need I can meet I do everything I can to meet it. And oh yeah, once a week I get up a little bit earlier so I can write "Happy Friday!"
I want to circle back to the beginning. In the beginning I knew I wanted to be a football coach because I wanted to make a difference in a kids life. If you asked me my dream I would have told you it was to be a football coach in the Southeast Conference (SEC), preferably Georgia. When I was in athletic administration I would have told you that my dream was to be an athletics director, preferably in an athletic department that needed building...I have always been a builder, not so much one to sustain something that has already been built. The funny thing is, no matter my position, I always had contentment in my Spirit and I had great purpose. Why? I believe it is because I was just misidentifying the dream. It wasn't about the SEC, building an athletic department, etc. It was about encouraging, empowering & equipping others to become the best they are capable of becoming. Could I do that as a football coach? Absolutely! And at any level. Do I do it now as a Development Professional? Without question!
This all comes back to the point the gentleman was making on the radio. Had I sat their simply waiting & hoping for my "dream" of coaching in the SEC or building an athletic department, I would miss living the life that I am living, I would miss living my purpose. Encouraging, empowering & equipping others is not done in only one field, vocation, conference, etc. It is done living life where God has me.
So Friend, what is your Why? As I was thinking about this earlier today I think a real clarifying question is "what do you really believe?" What you really believe will lead you to your why. Here is the thing; this IS your life. Don't miss it waiting for the right job, person, conference, etc. Find your why and live it every single day wherever you are!
One quick quote - it has nothing to do specifically with this Happy Friday! - that I came across this morning and want to share with you:
"So, we password protect our phones but we allow anything to enter our hearts???" - Derron E. Short
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.
Kev
Friday, November 10, 2017
Friday, November 3, 2017
Integrity & Grace
Happy Friday Friends!
I hope & trust this post finds you having a great day as a beautiful new day begins to dawn on the Texas Gulf Coast...home of the 2017 World Series Champion Houston Astros! #HoustonStrong
Gotta few things I want to share this morning. This first one I found THIS morning, like 10 minutes ago! :) The following was posted by Proactive Coaching on their Facebook page and can be found at positivethingsonly.com. I hope it affirms & inspires you.
Here Are 13 Traits of People that Have True Integrity:
- They are trustworthy
Trust is actually the most common trait of these people. Once people with integrity have gained your trust, they will try to keep it.
- They are honest
They are honest people who don't feel the need to lie because they want to get where they need to get in life without lying.
- They are authentic
People with true integrity are actually their truest forms. You will never catch them in a lie.
- They do good things whenever they can
They often help others. They enjoy improving others lives.
- They are humble
They don't quite know their own worth. Although they do good things, they do not quite notice their act of kindness.
- They apologize first
In case people with true integrity have done something wrong, they will actually apologize. They admit their mistake as well as try to make things right.
- They believe other people
They don't take lying well. In case you lie to them, they will never take your word again.
- They are kind to people that need it
If you look like you need a little pick me up, people with true integrity will try to brighten up your day.
- They realize when something is bothering others
These people have a great intuition, which allows them to realize when something is going on. In case someone is down in the dumps, people with true integrity will notice.
- They give others the benefit of the doubt
People with true integrity try to see the good in others as they feel like many people have integrity, as well. So, in case you take advantage of these people too much, they will probably get rid of you.
- They don't argue over disagreements
These people often talk through things in a civil manner. Sometimes, they don't talk at all. They don't argue over anything ridiculous.
- They don't take advantage of other people
They don't take advantage of other people. In addition, they often build others up as well as help them get where they need to be.
- They credit people that deserve it
Those who have true integrity don't take credit for things they didn't do. Moreover, they often credit people that deserve it. In case you help them with a project, they will probably mention your name so you would take credit for your work.
- They value other people's time
These people value their own time as well as they value other people's time. This means that they understand that you have many other places you need to be. That's why they do not hold you up.
- They are genuine
They show their genuineness by action. For example, they will return lost money without expecting any reward of praise.
- They hold themselves accountable
They have strong commitment standards. This means that they set goals and try to achieve them. In case they feel that they are wavering from their goals, they adjust quickly.
- They hold you accountable
In case you tell your goals to these people, they may try to help you achieve them. In fact, it is the need to help other people succeed that drives them.
Now I want to transition to another thought/idea. What, or where, do you turn when you go through a difficult season of life? Jon Gordon, in his book Training Camp: A Fable About Excellence, credits Tony Boselli, a former College Football All American and Pro Bowl Offensive Lineman with the Jacksonville Jaguars, with the idea of "during training camp everyone turns to something, you have to turn to the right things." To say it another way, "during difficult seasons of life, we all turn to something, you have to turn to the right things." Some turn to God, the Bible, wise counselors, etc. Others turn to alcohol, drugs, inappropriate relationships, etc. We are all going to go through storms. We are all going to turn to something. That something determines HOW we go through the storm and WHO we are when we come out on the other side of the storm. Please remember Sweet Friends, just as surely as storms will come they will also pass.
And shifting gears on you again real quick this morning, I want to share briefly something that happened during the World Series. By the way, did I mention the Houston Astros won?! :)
You might have seen, and probably heard, what happened during the 2nd inning of Game 3. Yuli Gurriel of the Astros hit a home run off of Yu Darvish of the Dodgers. Yuli then made an inappropriate racial gesture and an inappropriate racial slur. The cameras caught it and the world reacted.
Yu Darvish is a great pitcher. He had a tough World Series however failing moments don't define the greatness of an athlete any more than they do the greatness of a person. Be sure, Yu is a great athlete however he is an even greater human being.
While the world reacted with the vitriol that has become far to common, Yu responded completely differently. While acknowledging that the act was "disrespectful," Yu did something that still has me standing in awe. He sent out a tweet that, according to sports.yahoo.com said, "No one is perfect. That includes both you and I. What he has done today isn't right, but I believe we should put our effort into learning rather than to accuse him. If we can take something from this, that is a giant step for mankind. Since we are living in such a wonderful world, let's stay positive and move forward instead of focusing on anger. I am counting on everyone's big love." Wow...
I also read somewhere else that one of Yuli's mentors on the Astros is friends with Yu. According to the article I read, Yuli was really down about everything that happened. Yu's friend on the Astros texted Yu sharing that Yulie felt really bad, was down, etc. Yu then texted the mentor back and said something to the affect of, "Please tell him I still think he is a good person. He just made a mistake." When the mentor showed this to Yuli everything changed. The offended had told the offender he still believed in him...how different that life will now be. This is the definition of grace. And it should be noted, when Yuli came up to bat against Yu in Game 7, he tipped his cap to Yu as a sign of respect. How different this all could have gone down had Yu responded differently.
I am like any Dad/parent; I want my Tender Warriors to do good in anything they pursue, be it athletics, school, etc. While they watch and mimic the actions of great football/baseball players and strive to achieve their level of success, I pray they strive to be men like Yu. This world desperately needs them!
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.
Kev
I hope & trust this post finds you having a great day as a beautiful new day begins to dawn on the Texas Gulf Coast...home of the 2017 World Series Champion Houston Astros! #HoustonStrong
Gotta few things I want to share this morning. This first one I found THIS morning, like 10 minutes ago! :) The following was posted by Proactive Coaching on their Facebook page and can be found at positivethingsonly.com. I hope it affirms & inspires you.
Here Are 13 Traits of People that Have True Integrity:
- They are trustworthy
Trust is actually the most common trait of these people. Once people with integrity have gained your trust, they will try to keep it.
- They are honest
They are honest people who don't feel the need to lie because they want to get where they need to get in life without lying.
- They are authentic
People with true integrity are actually their truest forms. You will never catch them in a lie.
- They do good things whenever they can
They often help others. They enjoy improving others lives.
- They are humble
They don't quite know their own worth. Although they do good things, they do not quite notice their act of kindness.
- They apologize first
In case people with true integrity have done something wrong, they will actually apologize. They admit their mistake as well as try to make things right.
- They believe other people
They don't take lying well. In case you lie to them, they will never take your word again.
- They are kind to people that need it
If you look like you need a little pick me up, people with true integrity will try to brighten up your day.
- They realize when something is bothering others
These people have a great intuition, which allows them to realize when something is going on. In case someone is down in the dumps, people with true integrity will notice.
- They give others the benefit of the doubt
People with true integrity try to see the good in others as they feel like many people have integrity, as well. So, in case you take advantage of these people too much, they will probably get rid of you.
- They don't argue over disagreements
These people often talk through things in a civil manner. Sometimes, they don't talk at all. They don't argue over anything ridiculous.
- They don't take advantage of other people
They don't take advantage of other people. In addition, they often build others up as well as help them get where they need to be.
- They credit people that deserve it
Those who have true integrity don't take credit for things they didn't do. Moreover, they often credit people that deserve it. In case you help them with a project, they will probably mention your name so you would take credit for your work.
- They value other people's time
These people value their own time as well as they value other people's time. This means that they understand that you have many other places you need to be. That's why they do not hold you up.
- They are genuine
They show their genuineness by action. For example, they will return lost money without expecting any reward of praise.
- They hold themselves accountable
They have strong commitment standards. This means that they set goals and try to achieve them. In case they feel that they are wavering from their goals, they adjust quickly.
- They hold you accountable
In case you tell your goals to these people, they may try to help you achieve them. In fact, it is the need to help other people succeed that drives them.
Now I want to transition to another thought/idea. What, or where, do you turn when you go through a difficult season of life? Jon Gordon, in his book Training Camp: A Fable About Excellence, credits Tony Boselli, a former College Football All American and Pro Bowl Offensive Lineman with the Jacksonville Jaguars, with the idea of "during training camp everyone turns to something, you have to turn to the right things." To say it another way, "during difficult seasons of life, we all turn to something, you have to turn to the right things." Some turn to God, the Bible, wise counselors, etc. Others turn to alcohol, drugs, inappropriate relationships, etc. We are all going to go through storms. We are all going to turn to something. That something determines HOW we go through the storm and WHO we are when we come out on the other side of the storm. Please remember Sweet Friends, just as surely as storms will come they will also pass.
And shifting gears on you again real quick this morning, I want to share briefly something that happened during the World Series. By the way, did I mention the Houston Astros won?! :)
You might have seen, and probably heard, what happened during the 2nd inning of Game 3. Yuli Gurriel of the Astros hit a home run off of Yu Darvish of the Dodgers. Yuli then made an inappropriate racial gesture and an inappropriate racial slur. The cameras caught it and the world reacted.
Yu Darvish is a great pitcher. He had a tough World Series however failing moments don't define the greatness of an athlete any more than they do the greatness of a person. Be sure, Yu is a great athlete however he is an even greater human being.
While the world reacted with the vitriol that has become far to common, Yu responded completely differently. While acknowledging that the act was "disrespectful," Yu did something that still has me standing in awe. He sent out a tweet that, according to sports.yahoo.com said, "No one is perfect. That includes both you and I. What he has done today isn't right, but I believe we should put our effort into learning rather than to accuse him. If we can take something from this, that is a giant step for mankind. Since we are living in such a wonderful world, let's stay positive and move forward instead of focusing on anger. I am counting on everyone's big love." Wow...
I also read somewhere else that one of Yuli's mentors on the Astros is friends with Yu. According to the article I read, Yuli was really down about everything that happened. Yu's friend on the Astros texted Yu sharing that Yulie felt really bad, was down, etc. Yu then texted the mentor back and said something to the affect of, "Please tell him I still think he is a good person. He just made a mistake." When the mentor showed this to Yuli everything changed. The offended had told the offender he still believed in him...how different that life will now be. This is the definition of grace. And it should be noted, when Yuli came up to bat against Yu in Game 7, he tipped his cap to Yu as a sign of respect. How different this all could have gone down had Yu responded differently.
I am like any Dad/parent; I want my Tender Warriors to do good in anything they pursue, be it athletics, school, etc. While they watch and mimic the actions of great football/baseball players and strive to achieve their level of success, I pray they strive to be men like Yu. This world desperately needs them!
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.
Kev
Friday, October 27, 2017
You Are Able
Happy Friday Friends!
I hope & trust this post finds you having a great day as a beautiful new day begins to dawn on the Texas Gulf Coast!
Earlier this week I had the opportunity to introduce a truly remarkable woman prior to a speech she was giving at the launch of the Ability Resource Group. At 8 months old she got polio and this left her with partial paralysis on one side of her body and lack of strength on the other side. She had a dream of being a doctor. She grew up in a time before ADA laws and the protections they provide. She went to 4 different medical schools to meet with the Deans. She asked each one if she could become a doctor. Two of the Deans told her that she could not become a physician. Another gave some answer that was basically "no" however they appeared to be aware that there might be legal ramifications of saying such a thing. The last school said, "why couldn't you?" As she noted, "they looked at what I could do instead of what I couldn't do." This woman's life is a great great example of strength, perseverance & self-less service. This woman's life is a great inspiration and I am truly blessed to call her "friend." :)
I have shared this before and I feel compelled to share it again...it was transformational to me. Driving home listening to the radio several years ago, a lady called in for prayer for her young son. She explained that her son had disabilities. As soon as the sweet Mom got the word "disabilities" out of her mouth, the radio host interrupted her and said, "Please tell me about your sons abilities." I don't remember the things the Mom said specifically anymore. I do remember her voice changing as she told all the special things her precious little boy could do. It was a profound perspective shift for me.
That night when I got home, I gathered my greatest calling - my amazing family - around me and we talked about abilities & disabilities. We talked about the fact that ALL of us have abilities & disabilities. Some, like my friend, have physical disabilities that are readily apparent when you look at them. This however does not change the fact that they still have many amazing abilities. Some have disabilities that we would never know by looking at them. And this does not change the fact that they many amazing abilities.
A couple of quick takeaways:
1. What are you looking for? You see, we find what we are looking for. If you are looking for what a person cannot do you will certainly be able to find it. Likewise, if you are looking for what a person can do you will find it as well. It all comes back to us and what we are looking for. While nobody can do everything, everybody can do many things and they can add great value to you, your work, your life. It is tragic that we would eliminate anyone simply because there are a couple of things they cannot do while there are countless things they can do.
2. I really like the folks who know who they really are, don't you? Have you ever noticed how much time people, including you & I, spend trying to hide their weaknesses, our disabilities. We cover them up any way we can - be it with clothing, an aggressive attitude or speech, by not even trying. These are all defense mechanisms to prevent others from seeing who we really are, to not let them know that we have some sort of disability. Those with physical disabilities don't always have that opportunity. There is no way to hide who they are and in this, many find great freedom...they are free to be themselves. There is great wisdom there Friends! We all have disabilities! To know who we are, to embrace our purpose and to walk boldly & confidently in that purpose is something that is available to all of us. Not to do so is perhaps the greatest disability.
Please don't hesitate to contact me at any time if there is ever anything I can do for you. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.
Kev
I hope & trust this post finds you having a great day as a beautiful new day begins to dawn on the Texas Gulf Coast!
Earlier this week I had the opportunity to introduce a truly remarkable woman prior to a speech she was giving at the launch of the Ability Resource Group. At 8 months old she got polio and this left her with partial paralysis on one side of her body and lack of strength on the other side. She had a dream of being a doctor. She grew up in a time before ADA laws and the protections they provide. She went to 4 different medical schools to meet with the Deans. She asked each one if she could become a doctor. Two of the Deans told her that she could not become a physician. Another gave some answer that was basically "no" however they appeared to be aware that there might be legal ramifications of saying such a thing. The last school said, "why couldn't you?" As she noted, "they looked at what I could do instead of what I couldn't do." This woman's life is a great great example of strength, perseverance & self-less service. This woman's life is a great inspiration and I am truly blessed to call her "friend." :)
I have shared this before and I feel compelled to share it again...it was transformational to me. Driving home listening to the radio several years ago, a lady called in for prayer for her young son. She explained that her son had disabilities. As soon as the sweet Mom got the word "disabilities" out of her mouth, the radio host interrupted her and said, "Please tell me about your sons abilities." I don't remember the things the Mom said specifically anymore. I do remember her voice changing as she told all the special things her precious little boy could do. It was a profound perspective shift for me.
That night when I got home, I gathered my greatest calling - my amazing family - around me and we talked about abilities & disabilities. We talked about the fact that ALL of us have abilities & disabilities. Some, like my friend, have physical disabilities that are readily apparent when you look at them. This however does not change the fact that they still have many amazing abilities. Some have disabilities that we would never know by looking at them. And this does not change the fact that they many amazing abilities.
A couple of quick takeaways:
1. What are you looking for? You see, we find what we are looking for. If you are looking for what a person cannot do you will certainly be able to find it. Likewise, if you are looking for what a person can do you will find it as well. It all comes back to us and what we are looking for. While nobody can do everything, everybody can do many things and they can add great value to you, your work, your life. It is tragic that we would eliminate anyone simply because there are a couple of things they cannot do while there are countless things they can do.
2. I really like the folks who know who they really are, don't you? Have you ever noticed how much time people, including you & I, spend trying to hide their weaknesses, our disabilities. We cover them up any way we can - be it with clothing, an aggressive attitude or speech, by not even trying. These are all defense mechanisms to prevent others from seeing who we really are, to not let them know that we have some sort of disability. Those with physical disabilities don't always have that opportunity. There is no way to hide who they are and in this, many find great freedom...they are free to be themselves. There is great wisdom there Friends! We all have disabilities! To know who we are, to embrace our purpose and to walk boldly & confidently in that purpose is something that is available to all of us. Not to do so is perhaps the greatest disability.
Please don't hesitate to contact me at any time if there is ever anything I can do for you. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.
Kev
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