Priorities

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great Saturday...it is such a beautiful day! Additionally, I hope and trust you all had a great week.

So here I am writing Happy Friday on Saturday once again and I don't have much time. I feel bad that I was not able to get Happy Friday out on Friday however my spirit tells me that I am getting this to you all at the perfect time. Let me explain.

This past week I was out of town for work from Tuesday through Thursday night. My flight landed on Thursday night at 10:15 p.m. By the time I had gone to baggage claim, taken the shuttle to my car and drove home I got home at 11:30 p.m. I had made up my mind that I would type Happy Friday then, when I got home, because by the time I got all done it would be past midnight. When I opened the door I saw the most beautiful sight; my Precious Bride had decided to surprise me by staying up until I got home. We stayed up talking about our week, our life, our family until nearly 1:00 a.m.

No problem I thought as I drifted off to sleep, I will get up first thing in the morning and send out Happy Friday. I had the alarm set for 6:00 a.m. - this would give me 30 minutes before my boys woke up. Within 30 seconds of the alarm going off I heard a rustling by our bedroom door. I turned to see these two beautiful blue eyes staring at me. My 12-year old softly said, "I have been waiting for you to get up." We couldn't have talked for more than 5 minutes when my 7-year old came running into the room, jumping into my arms and telling me, "I love you Daddy"...one of approximately 20 times he would tell me this over the next 2 hours we would spend together before I left for the office. Happy Friday would now have to be on hold...I needed - wanted really - to spend time with my family. My spirit told me then, and confirms now, that this was the right decision.

O.K., no problem. I will send out Happy Friday on Friday night after we get home from my 16-year olds first football game of the season. Yeah I know, I should have known better. After the game, after going to dinner with several players & their parents and then getting home my boys - all of them - and I sat out on the back porch and talked about the game, about leadership, about life. At 12:30 a.m. we decided it was probably time to go to bed. I guess Happy Friday would now have to wait until Saturday.

Today has been a great day. Our family spent time together this morning, we went and got all my 7-year olds stuff for Cub Scouts, we went to a Bar & Grill and ordered nothing but cheese curds with lemon waters...we have spent time together, enjoying one another - I love that!

So here I am. I want to ask you Friends to please think about and consider your priorities. I can't tell you what they should be - your spirit will have to be your guide. For every choice we make their is a sacrifice of another choice and there are consequences. You all are very, very important to me. Sending out Happy Friday is very, very important to me. Sending out a thought, an idea on Facebook and on Twitter every day is very, very important to me. Choosing to be an intentional, positive influence in others lives every day is very, very important to me. As I have thought about all of this, recognizing the peace in my spirit as I went from one thing to another I realized my priorities were being ordered. For me I am first a precious child of a loving God. First I will pursue Him each day. Second, I have been given the honor, the privilege and the awesome responsibility of being the husband to the greatest earthly gift God could ever give. I love, value, cherish and adore my Precious Bride, I am fully committed to her and to our marriage - I must first be the husband she needs. Third, I have been given the honor, the privilege and the awesome responsibility of being the father to 3 precious spirits - boys becoming men who will someday have to answer their call from God, to make decisions for their wives and for their children. I have been called to lead them, to guide them, to protect them. After my wife, they are my most important calling on earth. Fourth is this awesome, inspiring calling that God has given me to choose to be an intentional, positive influence in the lives of others. I will continue to fulfill this calling however it will only been done properly & in order - God, Wife, Sons & Serving Others.

I gotta run now. We are headed over to my in-laws house for a cookout to celebrate my brother-in-laws birthday. I get to spend time with my precious family and I get to have a cookout...blessed beyond measure!!!

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please do take a moment to intentionally choose your priorities and enjoy your precious families.

Kev

What Will Your Influence Be During The Seasons of Life?

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and another awesome week coming to a close for you. It is amazing to me how each day; each week just continues to fly by.

I want to share two thoughts/ideas with you on this beautiful August morning.

1. As a husband, as a Dad I want the very best for my Beautiful Bride and my 3 Tender Warriors whom I have been given the awesome, incredible responsibility – inescapable responsibility - of leading, guiding & protecting. I don’t want them to experience hurt, pain, sorrow or disappointment. I want all their hopes, goals and dreams to come true. I want them to live life every single day to the fullest with great joy, happiness and peace. If you are a husband, wife, Mom, Dad, if you have anyone in this world that means, well, the world to you, you know what I mean.

Life doesn’t happen that way though does it? AND, it is often – all the time maybe – in the trials, tribulations & storms of life that we grow the most. Ironic isn’t it; we spend most of our time trying to avoid – desperately so – the very things that will help us grow, shape our character, prepare us for our greater purpose, etc.

As I was thinking about all this, the following scripture came to mind from Ecclesiastes 3:

¹ There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens:

²     a time to be born and a time to die,
    a time to plant and a time to uproot,
³     a time to kill and a time to heal,
    a time to tear down and a time to build,
⁴     a time to weep and a time to laugh,
    a time to mourn and a time to dance,
⁵     a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
⁶     a time to search and a time to give up,
    a time to keep and a time to throw away,
⁷     a time to tear and a time to mend,
    a time to be silent and a time to speak,
⁸     a time to love and a time to hate,
    a time for war and a time for peace.

Does this make you sad, discouraged maybe? I truly hope not Friend. You see, this is life. We live in a fallen, broken, hurting world. As hard as we try – and most of us try awfully hard – life will happen to us. This leads me to my second point.

2. What will your influence be…? Who or what are you going to allow to influence your life? Whoever or whatever it is will determine how you respond, how you go through each season as it comes…and again, the seasons ARE coming. Where do you place your hope? Where do you find your peace? Where do you find the strength to go on? See, these are all choices that we will make – whether intentionally or unintentionally – and whatever choice we make will bring with it a corresponding set of consequences. Again, who or what are you allowing to influence your life? Someone or something is…if you don’t like the way that is working out for you it might be time to consider a change. I can’t tell you what should choose, I can only testify to what I have found.

The other part of this whole “What will your influence be…?” thing is this; what will your influence be in the life of others…as they deal with birth, death, as they plant, as they uproot, as they weep, as they laugh? There is absolutely no doubt about it Friend; you are going to influence them. The only thing to determine, that you will determine, is whether this influence is positive or negative. And please don’t miss this critically important piece; whoever or whatever you are allowing to influence your life will impact/affect the influence you will have in the lives of others. Do you remember the quote that I shared with you before from Ken Whitten which captured it perfectly? “What’s in the well always comes up in the bucket.” That is you and that is me Friends…we can’t escape it.

And my spirit is screaming at me to share this with you; what will your influence be in the life of your spouse? Your son? Your daughter? Your best friend? The guy that you walk by every day on the way to the office? All of them are being influenced by someone or something…is it you? Just like you and me they are going through a season; are you having a positive influence in their life during this season? What do they see in you, in me, as we go through our seasons? It is easy to show them joy, happiness & peace when we are going through a season of birth, planting, healing, dancing, etc. But more importantly, what do they see when we go through a season of death, weeping or scattered stones? Do we still return to our source, boldly, confidently, knowing that this season to shall pass and there will again be prosperity? That in the midst of any storm there is hope, there is life, that there is a plan that we walk in faith…always?

From the depths of my heart I hope these questions challenge you as much as they have challenged me typing them. The bible makes it very clear that there will be struggles, trials & tribulations…not if but when. If you are a God believing, bible believing – and more importantly living – person, you also know that God has overcome the world, that victory is assured, that through any storm, trial or tribulation God is with you. Again, I am not here to tell you what to believe or how to live. I am simply here to profess what I believe and as your friend, regardless of your belief system, to ask you “What will your influence be?”

Please let me know if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families. I will always be willing, and truly consider it an honor, to help you any way I can.

Have a great day – that is a choice you know…to make it a great day, have a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

The Past Year

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and an awesome week coming to a close for you! This is such a special time of year; the kids are all starting back to school, new shoes, new clothes, backpacks that turn anyone younger than 8-years old into little human turtles that sometimes fall over if they stop to fast or bend over…just absolutely love it!

So I thought I was going to be writing about one thing this week and low and behold God had another plan. I went to church last Sunday and the Pastor preached a truly incredible sermon on service, on serving others…it spoke so powerfully to my spirit. I was certain that this is what I was going to right about this Friday. Talked to my family about serving others, looked for opportunities to serve others, my quotes/thoughts of the day early in the week on Twitter and Facebook were about service…yes, I was certain that I would write about serving others. Then, on either Tuesday or Wednesday night, my Precious Family and I were talking about this past year. So much has happened in this past year…there have been great leaps of faith, there has been heartache, there has been tears. In each and every situation God showed up… B-I-G T-I-M-E. I have thought so much about this past year, how God was always good, always faithful and how my family and I have learned and grown so much, so so much, during this time. It is this, the past year that I want to share with you on this beautifully blessed Friday morning…the lessons we have learned, our testimony of what God has done.

August 1, 2011 I resigned from a job without having a job. While I would never advise anyone do this God had made it perfectly clear to me that this was the right thing for me to do. You see, He had actually been talking to me for the better part of 8 months about the job I would eventually resign from…the only problem was, I wouldn’t listen. It is truly ironic; if you have ever spent any time talking to me directly you will undoubtedly hear me refer to listening to your heart because it is through our heart that God speaks to us. Well God was speaking however Kevin was listening. See, I was trying so hard to do the “right thing”, to “figure it out” I just couldn’t see how desiring to serve the Lord vocationally could possibly be the wrong thing even if He was telling me it was the wrong thing. Yeah, pretty dumb…absolutely no different than you going to interview for a job, the “boss” telling you this is not where you should be, you somehow getting offered the position and then taking it expecting everything to work out fine despite what your heart, your spirit was screaming to you. In reality, it worked out more than fine, it worked out great. God continued to love me, to speak to me and finally, when there was nowhere else to turn, I listened to Him and with clarity that was so sharp that it still moves my spirit thinking about it, I walked in complete faith knowing that what I was doing was now what God wanted. Lesson Learned: Do not violate your own Spirit. It truly doesn’t matter what anyone else says, thinks or does or for that matter, what you say, think, what your justifications are, etc. The only thing that truly matters is what God says, where He is leading you. And know this Friends, He loves you and me so much that He will continue to pursue us. Run if you wish however please know that your spirit will continue to cry out to you, God will pursue you fervently until finally He get’s your full attention. This is my testimony, this is Jonah’s testimony…it doesn’t have to be yours.

During the next 3 ½ months I went without a job was incredibly…peaceful. I knew that I was now walking totally, completely where God would have me walk and I knew at the other end, this storm would pass, that God would deliver my family and I, that He was in control, that everything was going to be o.k. I had no idea what the middle – the time between leaving the job and regaining employment – would be like, and to be sure Satan tried desperately to get my attention, to gain a foothold in my life, however as is always the case when God is the Source, the Strength, the Direction, Satan loses. You have heard of the “peace that goes beyond understanding?” Well Friends, I have experienced it! Not only did God give me a peace that goes beyond understanding (I am telling you, it is surreal! I should be freaking out, panicking and every time Satan attempted to tell me another lie – he is not called the Master Deceiver for nothing – there was this voice piercing my spirit saying “It is o.k., I am in control, just keep pursuing Me and trusting Me.), He blessed my life so richly during that time that it is truly humbling and honestly, overwhelming. During that time my Bride and I connected at a completely different level – a level that altered the course of our lives and the legacy of our children forever -, “What Will Your Influence Be…?” (blog, facebook, twitter, trademark, etc.) was created, I was able to attend every one of my sons football practices, I was able to take the kids to school and pick them up and He placed two incredible Godly men in my life who – unfortunately for them – are saddled with me for the rest of their lives. Here I am, I have a Beautiful Bride & three Tender Warriors who I have the honor & privilege of being responsible for, I have no job, the savings account is quickly dwindling and I have peace that goes beyond understanding and blessings flying at me right and left. Wow!!! Lesson Learned: Peace – I am talking about a total, complete peace – comes from the Lord and is attained in pursuing Him, allowing Him to be the Lord of your life. Through all the earthly pursuits, fixes, answers, etc. this peace cannot be found…it is truly a gift from Him.

At the last minute – pretty sure God wants to make sure we know who is responsible for our deliverance – God provided a job and, not only did he provide a job, He met every worry, concern, fear, etc. that my precious family had. Not one detail did He skip. Not one! Seriously?!?! It is amazing. Lesson Learned: God is faithful.

In May, life and death happened in a hurry. We had a “situation” – I can’t call it a storm, trial or tribulation as that incredible peace showed up again…praise God! – with our 16-year old son. Not only did God order and ordain every step, He had prepared our hearts for this time for months. As I looked back on the clear side of the storm I can see His hands leading and guiding me as early as January…incredible! This “situation” turned our hearts strongly towards one another as a family, enabled my son to take huge steps forward as a man and ultimately provided a better life, met so many needs of our entire family. God’s leading, guiding & protection – heart, mind, body & spirit – was all over everything. He had this all planned! It was up to us to pursue Him, to trust Him and to do everything properly & in order as He instructs. I am truly amazed at everything that happened, how it all came together, how blessed we truly are!

And as this “situation” was just working itself out my Dad died. Something that I don’t think I mentioned in my Happy Friday that I wrote about my Dad, he died on my incredible Little Tender Warriors 7^th birthday. Now that was a day Friends. Can I please tell you that as I type this there is a smile on my face? No, I did not enjoy watching my Dad literally take his last breath…this is not what brings the smile. The clarity that God provided me as my wife and I rushed to the hospital on that Sunday night – that I am the man I am because my Dad was the man, husband & father he was…and I mean that with the deepest love, respect & gratitude -, the reconciliation that my Dad and I had over the last 10 years of his life, the time I had with my Step-Mom – to tell her how special she is, how beautiful God made her, how my sister and I are forever indebted to her for the total, selfless love she gave my Dad, to simply say thank you – and to finally see my Dad at total, complete peace…these are the things that bring a smile to my face. As I drove home that day I prayed that God would lead me, that He would lead my precious family and that this would be a special day for the Little Tender Warrior waiting for his Daddy to get home to celebrate his 7^th birthday. You know what God did? As I pulled into the driveway there was a little camouflaged face boy, dreaming in his heart of becoming a great Navy Seal, bright blue eyes piercing my soul, wanting to hug his Dad. I truly have tears of joy in my eyes as I reflect on this special day! Some say that this could be bad, that my Dad died on my Tender Warriors 7^th birthday, that we will always be filled with sorrow on my son’s birthday because it was the day my Dad died. No Friends, May 21^st will forever be a great, great day…filled with great joy and celebration in my home. You see on May 21^st I will forever thank and praise God for blessing my life so richly with my precious son and, for allowing me for the only time in the 44 years of my life, to see my Dad at complete peace. Lessons Learned: God always is in control. He is preparing our hearts; He is preparing the way…always. If we will only seek Him, trust Him, look to Him for knowledge, wisdom, strength & courage He will lead us.

So Friends that is a quick snapshot of the Haslam year. We are truly blessed beyond measure.

Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you or your precious families. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and cherish your precious families.

Kev 

What's the Incentive?

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and an awesome week coming to a close for you!

On Wednesday I had lunch with a man I have known for about 5 years. As we were getting caught up on life we were talking about the fact that we are both refinancing of our homes...we have both chosen not to short-sale our homes or let them go into foreclosure, to do what we believe is the right thing to do, etc. It seems logical to me that our banks would be happy and willing to work with us and provide great customer service to us as we are honoring our commitments, we are paying our bills and we are trying to work with them. Instead we have both found great delays, extremely poor customer service and great (great!!!) frustration. My friend then asked a rhetorical question that I have thought about literally hundreds of times since then; he asked, "What is the incentive for doing the right thing?" He went on to give other examples of what he felt were injustices done in society when people strive "to do the right thing" however I have to be honest, I was in a fog, not fully listening to what he was saying any more as "what is the incentive for doing the right thing?" continued to reverberate in my mind, heart and spirit.

The answer to me is really quite simple - peace. Peace in my mind, my heart and my spirit in knowing that I have done, I am doing, what I feel in my heart is the right thing to do. You see, I have learned that God speaks to me through the Holy Spirit, through my heart, and when I listen to this leading, this guiding, there is great peace. This doesn't mean that there is always worldly success or tangible, hold in your hands benefits however I have found that no matter the storm, the trial or tribulation, when I am walking in complete obedience to the leading of my heart I have peace. This, in my humble opinion, is the incentive.

Now that I have given you my quick answer, my testimony, I digress. I can't help but think - at times with great sorrow in my spirit - how much this question drives our society, how many lives have been lost, hearts broken striving to get/find the "incentive." Why does the already incredibly gifted (wonder if they have fully considered where that gift comes from?) athlete feel they need to take performance enhancing drugs? Why does the person with adequate financial means need to lie, cheat, steal to get more money? Why does the incredibly beautiful woman - inside and out -, fearfully and wonderfully made, perfectly equipped to fulfill her life purpose give her mind and body to boys trying to prove they are men and in the process violate her own spirit, lowering her self-esteem, questioning her self-worth more and more after each encounter? Why do we have men - men made to be great, called to great purposes, who would accomplish great things and leave incredible legacies if only they would strive to become all that they were created to become instead of striving and trying to be something they were never created to become - acting like boys, running from their responsibilities, time and time again pursuing worldly definitions of success while their wives and children sit longing for them, desperately seeking their unconditional love, support and protection? Why? Why?! Why?!?!

I truly wish I knew all the answers however my spirit tells me I couldn't handle knowing all the answers. I really think it all comes down to this; determing who we are paying rent to, whose or what approval we are seeking. It is true; I can do everything "right" and it doesn't guarantee worldly success or worldly gain. There have been numerous times in my life when I KNOW I did the right thing and the world would define me and/or that moment as a smashing failure! I am completely fine with that...honored in fact. You see Friends, the peace that I felt in my spirit in those moments was so much greater than any feeling of euphoria or anything else that might come from some worldly incentive of fulfillment. Ultimately we will all have to choose who or what we will pay rent to, whose approval we will seek. I guess the cry of my heart this morning is that we would all understand that there are consequences to whatever we choose and we will all own the consequences of those choices whether we want to or not. For me, I am going to continue to strive every day to pursue the Lord, to seek His guidance and walk in the comfort, peace and protection that could only come from Him. This is my prayer for you and your families today as well.

Please let me know if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing and happy to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev