Happy Friday Friends!
I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and an awesome week coming to a close for you! I am simply amazed at how time fly’s; tonight is the last night of the regular high school football season. Unbelievable! I am not ready for it to end. I have truly cherished these past 10 weeks – watching my son play (I absolutely love watching my boys play!), the time with family, the new friends, the fun, the wings at Buffalo Wild Wings after the games (at least I am honest!), etc. A blessed life indeed!
On Monday I had lunch with a great man. He is one of those guys that when we get together I always leave enlightened, energized & challenged. I just love getting together with him.
I don’t remember exactly how we got on the subject however he gave two examples that really resonated with me. I, unlike all of you I am sure, get agitated sometimes when I am driving down the road and someone cuts me off. Living in the Phoenix metropolitan area one gets a lot of opportunities to get agitated! Anyhow, here are his two examples:
1. My friend asked me, “if you were driving blindfolded (neither this wise friend of mine nor I advocate for driving blindfolded though it appears a number of people in Phoenix do drive this way…sorry, I am trying to be nice!) and someone cut you off in traffic; would you be irritated then?” I immediately replied that I would not be irritated because I wouldn’t know it happened. He pointed out that the event was the same – the other car had cut me off – however because I didn’t see it, I did not get mad, angry, agitated, etc.
2. My friend then said, “what would you do if you knew the person that had just cut you off was in a hurry because they had a child dying in the hospital and they had exactly 10 minutes to get there to see their child one more time?” He didn’t wait for an answer and continued, “you wouldn’t care then would you?” I was trying to say no, however he was on a roll and continued, “you would even get out of their way wouldn’t you?” Again, the event was the same – the other car had cut me off – but because I knew the circumstances, I knew why they had cut me off, all of the sudden I felt compassion, I wanted to get out of their way, I wanted to do anything I could to help them, to make sure they made it to their child’s bedside, one more time. Wow!
On Monday night my Beautiful Bride had a meeting so it was just me and my 3 Tender Warriors at home. My 16-year old and I were in my room talking and all of the sudden my 7-year old came into my room, huge crocodile tears running down his face, threw himself face down on my bed, everything about him saying he is completely broken. I am stunned as I just left him 30 seconds earlier in the kitchen happily painting a picture. I asked him what is wrong. He sat up, trying to talk (you know what I am talking about…when you are trying to talk but you are crying so hard, your heart is so heavy, that you can hardly speak) and said, “the whole thing is ruined.” The “whole thing” was the picture he was painting for his little buddy at school.
Perspective…All of these things are about perspective. My friend’s first example was all about what we see or don’t see...perspective. His second example was about what we know or don’t know…perspective. My son was all about what is important to him, how he perceives he has performed, what he perceives the outcome to be…perspective.
As if to complete my lesson for the day, I walked into the kitchen and looked at the picture. From MY perspective it was not ruined at all. There were a couple of water drops in one spot and a color that had run into another. Perceiving – thank you Lord! – how important this was to my Precious Son, I picked up his brush and had fixed the “ruined” picture in about a minute. My sons perspective – based on his knowledge & experience – is that the picture is ruined. My perspective – based on my knowledge & experience – is that the picture can be easily fixed. We are looking at the same picture and yet seeing completely different things. He is devastated (please don’t minimize this and tell me it is only the picture of a 7-year old. My Mom once so wisely said, “their problems are as big to them as your problems are to you.” Did she ever get that right! Maybe it wasn’t something that I felt was a big deal however to him it was every bit as important to him as the most crucial, devastating events are to me.) and I, filled with love and compassion for my son, see a picture that can easily be fixed. Same event, two totally different perspectives. I also feel compelled to tell you that after this had all been fixed my Spirit spoke so strongly to me; this is how it is with you and God. We have this mess (maybe a specific event or perhaps how we perceive our entire lives) that so devastates our hearts, we are broken, perhaps crying big crocodile tears and He lovingly, with great compassion fixes our messes if we will only run to Him, throw ourselves down and say “the whole thing is ruined”, ask and allow Him to fix it.
Perspectives…we all have them. They are born from everything that makes us…well us. No two perspectives can be exactly the same unless two people are exactly – and I mean 100% exactly – the same. We could have what I would call “situational perspective” – I have experienced the exact same event as you, therefore I could share a perspective with you however depending on what lies beneath the surface – everything that makes us unique – we may very well experience the exact same event and have a completely different perspective of it. From the time we are born, to the parents we are born to, to the siblings we have or not, to the friends we have or not, to every single experience we have had– failures, successes, hurts, joys, etc. – they all shape our perspectives. Thinking about, realizing and respecting not only our perspective but also those of others is very enlightening and empowering. I encourage you to think about perspective – yours and others – and allow what you learn, with your spirits leading, to guide you. We may not share the exact same perspective but I can surely know & respect that you have one. You may not share my perspective but you can surely know & respect that I have one. I honestly don’t know what the outcome will be if we do this. I am however willing to take the chance. I want to have a heart to see and try to understand what you see, to care about what you care about, to have compassion when you hurt, to help you when you think I can, to do whatever I can to make your life journey better, more fulfilling and to help you become the best your are capable of becoming in fulfilling your life purpose.
Please let me know if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families & friends!
Kev
