It's All About Perspective

Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as this glorious new day begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! :)

Earlier this week I was visiting with a colleague about a task she had to do. I made the comment, "I would not like doing what you have to do all the time." She replied, "While I don't necessarily want to do it, I realize that it is important work, and I have the opportunity to make it as good as possible." She was honoring her calling and living a "get to" life rather than a "have to" life.

I remember the first time this perspective hit me in a really big way. I had the privilege of serving at an academic health center and I was speaking with a pediatric physician. She was explaining to me how she had stepped into her life calling. She was telling me about her experience working in a Pediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU). She told me about a particularly difficult day where she had to have a conversation with multiple families about taking their baby off life support. She stated, "I thought there has to be something more to it than this." A conversation no parent or physician wants to have and yet here she found herself on multiple occasions in a single day. She then decided that if this is what needed to be done, she was going to live a "get to" life rather than a "have to" life. Instead of dreading and fearing the moment, she was going to live fully in the moment, tenderly loving, caring, and serving to the very best of her ability. This led her to create about program that teaches physicians the compassionate delivery of medicine. 

What kind of life do you and I live? Do we have a whole bunch of things we "have to" do or do we have a whole bunch of things we "get to" do? I remember the season of life where I had 3 little boys in my home and I was running from one ballpark to another in a never ending way. The season, in reflection, was short. I remember a sweet, elderly, colleague at the time telling me, "These are the bleachers years...enjoy them." She was encouraging me to live a "get to" life as opposed to a "have to" life.

I found a few articles on this topic as I prepared for this Happy Friday and I want to share some excerpts with y'all this morning.

Jon Gordon wrote a article titled Get To instead of Have To on March 30, 2015. You can read the full article at jongordon.com. He stated in part:

"When I'm mentoring leaders I encourage them to focus on "get to" each day. I encourage them to focus on feeling grateful instead of stressed. The research shows we can't be stressed and thankful at the same time so when you are feeling thankful and focusing on "get to" you fuel up with positive emotions that uplift you rather than the stress hormones that drain you. People who do this, report feeling more energized, productive and engaged at work.

Sure there will be challenges and life isn't easy but if we approach each day as an opportunity to learn, grow and be thankful we live a more meaningful and powerful life.

So today join me in saying that my life is a gift not an obligation and I Get To make the most of it."

Audrey Rucker wrote an article titled, "Have To" Vs. "Get To" One word will change your outlook on life. on August 9, 2016. You can find the full article at theodysseyonline.com. She stated in part:

"By changing one simple word you will see the world and your life in a new light. Filled with positivity, gratefulness, and humility you will truly realize how much you "get to" do in your life. So my friends, the next time you go to complain about having to make dinner, having to go to practice, having to study, having to drive...remember how blessed you are that you "get to" do those things."

Finally, Andy Wooten wrote an article titled, Have To Vs. Get To on October 14, 2016. You can read the full article at tripeaksconsulting.com. Andy concludes the article with this:

"Changing your perspective may not change what goes on your to-do list, but it certainly makes a difference when it comes to how those things get done. Make the choice to replace Have To with Get To and see how your perspective and you life changes as a result.

Is your day filled with things you "have to do" or is it filled with things that you "get to do?""

So, Sweet Friends, the challenge for us is to live a "get to" kinda life as opposed to a "have to" kinda life. And, it is a choice we will have to make over and over again. Especially on days when we get to do a whole bunch of things, some of which might not be the things we would have chose to do or situation we would not have chosen to be in. On those days, and in those moments, let us remember that it is an honor and privilege to live the life we are living and let us honor our calling and the moment.

I want to close with a quote I came across this morning...I think it touches on living a get to life.

"Every day is important for us because it is a day ordained by God. If we are bored with life there is something wrong with our concept of God and His involvement in our daily lives. Even the most dull and tedious days of our lives are ordained by God and ought to be used by us to glorify Him." - Jerry Bridges

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well! :)

Kev

Everyone Has A Story

Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! I am beyond excited to live this day! It is new, there is so much opportunity, and I am running into it with hopeful expectation! How about you?! :)

I want to start off by sharing two different stories.

1. Last Saturday I was watching the NCAA baseball Super Regional between Mississippi State and Notre Dame. Notre Dame was up to bat and the broadcaster was talking about the hitter - I am sorry, I do not remember his name. He was talking about what a great kid the hitter is, how he coached youth baseball with him last summer, how the hitter shared his hopes and dreams for this season with him, etc. And suddenly I find myself rooting for this kid I do not know. Suddenly I want him to get a hit...I am living every pitch with him almost as though it were my own kid.

2. Several years ago, while I was still coaching, several members of our staff and I went to serve at a Field Day at the local elementary school. This lady walks up who is disheveled. It appears as though she is on drugs. Thoughts are racing through my mind and they are not positive, encouraging, or honoring. And then the darnedest things happens; one of our coaches recognizes the woman. He and his family had known her several years ago in his hometown. He asks if it is her and she says yes. He then starts talking to her, loving on her. She talks about the struggles of life, the path she has walked, and what has brought her to this point, on this day. And my friend listens and encourages with great compassion. And suddenly, I find myself caring deeply about this woman. 5 minutes earlier I am judging and being critical. Knowing that someone I cared about cared about her and hearing just a little bit of her story changed everything for, and in, me.

We all have a story. There are good parts and not so good parts. There are moments and experiences, successes and failures, tragedies and triumphs, that have brought all of us to this moment right now. We all have a story...and they all matter.

I simply want to encourage all of us with two things this morning:

1. Embrace your life, your story. We all have moments that we would like to forget...and we all have moments that we wish would never end. It is the sum of all our experiences that have made us the perfectly flawed people that we are today. So long as we are breathing, our stories are not over...they are being written every single day. And the people we will be 1 year from today will be drastically different, for good or bad, than the people that we are today. As a person who is better at beating himself up over mistakes, faults, and failures than you ever could be at beating me up, I want to encourage you to take a different path. Let's learn from the mistakes, faults, and failures, however let's not let them define us. It was a moment, not your whole life. Don't waste the lesson, learn and grow from it. Your life has great value, meaning, and purpose. We walk through storms to find our strength, to clarify who we really are. Instead of beating ourselves up, going on and on about our mistakes/faults/failures, lets learn from them, change what needs to be changed, and move forward knowing, to the depths of our souls, that we were created on purpose for a great purpose. And then lets live it! :)

2. Please remember, everyone has a story and that they all matter. In my line of work I have the honor and privilege of meeting so many people from virtually every walk of life. I absolutely love what I get to do...do you want to know why? Because I get to hear and learn people's stories. People are absolutely amazing, if only we will get to know them. I truly believe that we can learn something from everyone. People are a treasure-chest of wisdom and they are a never-ending well of inspiration...but we have to get to know them. Let's drop the judgement and let's do the hard work of really seeking to understand, to get to know people, to come alongside them, and to do life with them. Every single life has value, meaning, and purpose. Everyone has a story...and they all matter!

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well! :)

Kev

What Will We Do With Them?

Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! I am so excited to live this day! There is hope, opportunity, and promise in this beautiful blank canvas! Truly blessed beyond measure! :)

Last week we talked about the fact that each one of us has been assigned, by God, a sphere of influence. It is a space where you and I, individually, can love, care for, and serve others within our sphere better than anyone else. It is not that we are better than anyone else, it is about the fact that it is ours - created specifically for us and we are perfectly created for it...truly powerful!

Earlier this week I was reading the Bible Study, Lead or Be Lunch: The Power of Earning Influence by David Villa. I was on day 8 of this 10 day plan when I read this:

"It is my belief that all of us possess God given talents and abilities that only we can use. I want to remind you again to look at what's in your hands. God has given gifts to each of us from his great variety of spiritual gifts so that God's generosity can flow through you (1 Peter 4:10)."

And in that moment, all the dots were connected for me! Not only has God given each of us a specific sphere of influence, He has also given us talents and abilities that only we can use. Pretty awesome God we serve...pretty incredible life we are privileged to live! :)

So let's unpack this a little bit by looking at 1 Peter 4: 10 - 11:

"God has given each of you some special abilities; be sure to use them to help each other, passing on to others God's many kinds of blessings. Are you called to preach? Then preach as though God himself were speaking through you. Are you called to help others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies so that God will be glorified through Jesus Christ - to Him be glory and power forever and ever. Amen."

"God has given each of you some special abilities..."

Please note, it does not say "some of you." No, it says "each of you." Well, Sweet Friends, that includes you and I. There are special abilities you and I, and everyone else, have been given. Your gifts are not mine and mine are not yours. We are each incredibly valuable, irreplaceably so, and our paths are our paths alone to walk. We have been given the sphere of influence and the abilities to aid us...what will we do with them?

"Be sure to use them to help each other..."

Please don't miss this critically important part - it is not about us, individually, but rather what can be done through us to serve others. We are not given our abilities to hide away or to serve ourselves but rather we are given them to love, care for, and serve others...what will we do with them?

And then a couple of examples are given however this is not an exhaustive list. The list of "special abilities" is as limitless as the number of precious souls walking the face of the earth...and you are one of them! :) Are you called to sing? Are you called to write? Are you called to care for a specific population? Are you called to work with wood, glass, metal, etc? You get the point! Whatever special abilities we are given I truly believe we are each called to do two things:

1. With God's help, develop them to the fullness of their potential. 

2. Use them to love, care for, and serve others.

Our sphere's of influence are specific to us, as are our special abilities. There is no one else exactly like you or I...each of us is specifically equipped to live this blessed life we are called to live! We simply have to choose to walk in all that we were created to become! 

A couple of quotes I want to share with you on this topic:

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me.'" - Erma Bombeck

This is truly the fervent prayer of my heart! Whatever abilities I have, I pray that I will develop them to the fullness of what I am capable of becoming and that I will completely exhaust myself loving, caring for, and serving others! I truly believe that this would be a life well lived!

"Our talents are the gift that God gives to us...What we make of our talents is our gift back to God." - Leo Buscaglia

It seems to me that I would be living so far below what I am capable of living if I did not work on the abilities God has given me...I don't want to live that kind of life! I don't know why God chose to convict my heart with "What Will Your Influence Be...", the desire and ability to encourage, empower, and equip others to become all that they are capable of becoming, to write a blog and post positive messages, or to cave wood, but He did. These purposes drive and inspire me every single day! What are your abilities? Most importantly, what will you do with them?

I want to close by sharing a piece titled, "The Easy and The Hard." It was written by Coach Don Meyer.

"Sarcasm is easy. Sincerity is hard.

Reaction is easy. Action is hard.

Following is easy. Leading is hard.

Losing is easy. Winning is hard.

Talking is easy. Listening is hard.

Flab is easy. Muscle is hard.

Lying is easy. Truth is hard.

Sleeping is easy. Waking is hard.

Falling is easy. Getting up is hard.

Criticism is easy. Taking criticism is hard.

Letting go is easy. Hanging on is hard.

Pride is easy. Humility is hard.

Thoughtless is easy. Thoughtful is hard.

Dumb is easy. Smart is hard.

Cowardice is easy. Courage is hard."

My hope and prayer for each one of us is that we will CHOOSE the hard! :)

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well! :)

Kev

What Will You Do With It?

Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new opportunity begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! :)

I want to start this week's Happy Friday by sharing a brief excerpt from VIP (Very Influential Person): How to Influence with Vision, Integrity, and Purpose by O.S. Hawkins. I am about half way through this thoughtful, inspiring book and I would strongly recommend it for all of you! :)

"Etymologically, our English word influence comes from the compound of two Latin words that are translated "in" and "flow." This brings to mind a word picture of a mighty and vibrant, crystal-clear river that runs deep and wide. Its rapid current flows powerfully, circumventing any and all obstacles in its way. This river is fed by numerous smaller creeks and streams that arrive at the river and virtually empty themselves into it. Letting themselves be caught up in the flow. Influence works like that; you live your life in such a vibrant manner that those who come into contact with you become caught up in your flow.

In writing to the ancient Corinthians, and to us, the apostle Paul pointed to the fact that each of us has been assigned a specific sphere of influence. Paul taught that we should "boast only with regard to the area of influence God assigned to us" and prayed that "our area of influence among you may be greatly enlarged" (2 Corinthians 10:13, 15 ESV). Put this book down in your lap and think about that for a moment: God has assigned a specific area of influence for you! This is not some nebulous, esoteric kind of undefined influence. This is a specific area of influence where no one can be as effective as you. There is someone you can influence like no one else in this world can. No matter who you are, where you live, who you know, or what you do, the God of the universe has assigned a sphere of influence just to you. It may well be you have never thought of this, but recognizing and living out this truth can be life changing both for you and the people you influence. So what will you do about the fact that God assigned to you an area where He desires that someone somewhere gets caught up in your flow?"

Pretty powerful, right?!?! I have read the 2nd paragraph several times, and typed it now, and it hits me hard every time!

• "God has assigned a specific area of influence for you!"
• "...a specific area of influence where no one can be as effective as you."
• "...the God of the universe has assigned a sphere of influence just to you."
• "...recognizing and living out this truth can be life changing both for you and the people you influence."

Incredible! Please let those words wash over you again and again! Let them speak deeply to our souls, convict our Spirits, and inspire our actions! 

So, what will we do with this influence we have been assigned. Will we rise up and become all that we were created to become? Will we honor this assignment? Intentionally? We cannot argue whether or not we have influence; biblically we have 2 Corinthians and in the secular world we have scientific research that tells us the most introverted person will influence 10,000 in their lifetime and the average person will influence 80,000! So, what will we do with it? Your life, your assignment, your choice! :)

Todd Gongwer wrote a great book titled, Lead...For God's Sake! I have referenced this book in previous Happy Friday's and I give it my absolute highest recommendation. It is a great book! Earlier this week Todd posted the following on Twitter...it is a great tool for all of our toolboxes!

12 Choices for the Graduate...from a wise Janitor

1. Choose to BE where you are: Mobile devices constantly tempt us to check out of where we are mentally, and often emotionally. Manage this urge. Discipline yourself to BE where you are and engage with the people in your midst.

2. Choose your close friends wisely: Love everyone, but spend the majority of your time with people who encourage and challenge you to be your best! Character influences character, both good and bad!

3. Choose to be intentional with personal development: Find good mentors, seek honest feedback, read good books, and guard your heart. Your intake always affects your output!

4. Choose to pursue YOUR best over THE best: "The best" is about external comparisons, "your best" is about personal composition. Focus on maximizing the gifts you've been given.

5. Choose to embrace struggles: Pruning is painful, but it's been a proven path to healthy growth for may of the worlds greatest leaders. EVERY trial you face is an opportunity for growth.

6. Choose to live by Truth: Virtually every media outlet you encounter is agenda driven. Find the agenda, learn from the perspective, but make your decisions based upon TRUTH - it does exist...and it doesn't change as a result of cultural trends or preferences.

7. Choose to embrace your role in leadership: Leadership begins with influence from words, attitudes & behaviors, all three of which you choose! Choose wisely - use your influence for the good of others, not just for yourself!

8. Choose to take responsibility: Don't play the blame game. When issues arise around you, search within first to find how you've contributed to the problem, then own it and move on!

9. Choose to leave things better than they were when you found them: This applies to any job, anything you borrow AND to your interactions with people.

10. Choose to exceed expectations: Don't live life to merely meet minimum requirements - give YOUR best! Find the expectations and strive to exceed them; opportunity will follow!

11. Choose to embrace the journey: Most accomplishments that matter in life take time and effort, and require you to engage in a process. Learn to embrace delayed gratification along with this process that comes with it, and your accomplishments will become much more fulfilling!

12. Choose to prioritize PURPOSE over passions: Aspire to be great & pursue your passions but not at the expense of the people God has placed in your path. Relationships are the foundation of your purpose in this life...value every one of them as such!

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well! :)

Kev