The Little Things

 Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! This day is going to be a great one!

I want to start off by sharing a couple of things with you…

Every night my Beautiful Bride gets my workout clothes and places them on the bathroom counter in the following order from top to bottom – underwear, workout tights, shorts, undershirt, shirt, socks, and then my towel. Why does she do that? Because when I wake up at 3:30 a.m. and stumble into the bathroom and get dressed in the dark, she wants to make it easier for me. It is something completely selfless that she does for me …and it blesses me more than she will ever know (until she reads this week’s Happy Friday, though I have told her how much I appreciate it several times!).

 A couple of weeks ago Kath stopped by my office right around lunch time. When I don’t have work lunches, she makes me lunches to take to the office – they are the best! While she was there, I pulled out my mandarin oranges that are in one of those little plastic containers. As I was opening it, I commented that the person who is responsible for packaging at whatever company they are from has clearly never opened one because it is nearly impossible to open them without spilling juice on my clothes/desk/floor, etc. The next day I go and open my lunch. My oranges are there again however this time they are in a Tupperware container from home. I immediately knew…she had opened them at home and placed them in the container so I wouldn’t spill the juice. As silly as it may sound to you, it touched my heart deeply. It was simple however so thoughtful. When I called her to thank her, she said, “better to spill it on my robe than your suit.”

We are always looking for these big, grandiose things to do, to express our love, to show we care, and yet these two simple things mean more to me than I could ever adequately explain. It is so kind, so thoughtful, and I am so very blessed…beyond measure!

Y’all know where this one is going; let’s look for the opportunities to do the little things and lets actually do them! I sincerely hope you have had some small gesture like those I have mentioned above done for you – if so, you know how it touches your heart in a different way. Let’s be that…lets touch hearts in a different way. Let’s look for the little ways to let others know that we know about the struggle/challenge and, if we can, let's make it a little easier. So simple and yet, so beautiful!

And one more thing that is challenging my spirit right now; Neither Kath nor I want to hear the, “Kathy is so sweet” or the like. She is absolutely the kindest soul and the sweetest person I have every met in my life…no question! That, however, is not the point of this Happy Friday. The point is you don’t have to be a super anything to do these things – you simply have to care! We all care about someone/something, and we are all capable of it. So please don’t look at the example and say, “I could never do something like that”…you absolutely can! Not to do so is a choice, simple as that!

I want to share a few quotes to wrap this up…

“Little things over time make big differences, as true for depletion as it is for progress.” – Shellen Lubin 

“Without water drops, there can be no oceans; without steps, there can be no stairs; with little things, there can be no big things!” – Mehmet Murat Ildan

“Never underestimate the power of a simple smile, a kind word or the acknowledgement of another. Little gestures can move mountains.” – David Cuschieri

“Do something great today. Be kind to one person. Be loving to another soul. Say thank you. Little things are no tiny matters.” – Hrishikesh Agnihotri

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well!

Kev

Big News!

Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama!

O.K., I have big news! Y’all ready?! O.K., here it is…I am not perfect. Those of you who know me personally and are currently laughing hysterically, please stop. That is rude! 😊And while I know it is p-a-i-n-f-u-l-l-y obvious that I am not perfect, and thus the hearty laughs, there is one person that must be reminded regularly…me! Let me put some context around this one for you.

Last Saturday night my Beautiful Bride, one of my Tender Warriors, and I went out to dinner with a friend of ours. During the dinner I got a little bit upset about something and spoke in a way that was less than kind…should’ve been rereading my own Happy Friday from last week! Anyways, when I woke up on Sunday morning and was going through my quiet time, my Spirit was convicting me. In rapid succession, I knew exactly what I needed to do:

1.      Reach out to the friend and apologize for the way I spoke – no justifications or explanations, just simply “I am sorry.”

2.     I needed to talk to my Bride and Tender Warrior. I needed to apologize to them, again, no justification or explanations.

I did both of those and yet there was something nagging at me. You see, as I sit here and type this, I can still see the looks on my Bride and Warriors face as I spoke in an uncharacteristic manner…and my heart aches. I failed them. I came up short and the looks on their face, the looks of disappointment, well, it hurts.

And then there was this moment of clarity; yes, I failed, and I will certainly fail again. I was listening to a David Pollack podcast yesterday morning and he said something like, “The one thing that every single human being has in common is that we have all failed. The only questions, the only thing to be decided, is will we fail forward or backward.” This affirmed what my Spirit convicted me of last Sunday; yes, I failed…not very notable…every human fails. What is notable, and what I believe will determine the quality of the life I live, is what I do with that failing moment. Do I learn and grow? Do I try to justify? Am I seeking the Lord and allowing the Spirit to instruct and guide me?

So after apologizing to my Beautiful Bride and Tender Warrior I told them:

1.      I know I am not perfect and that is why I need the Lord to lead my life.

2.     That I had apologized to them and to our friend because my Spirit convicted me to do so.

3.     That I would continue to pursue the Lord every day so I can grow to become the man, husband, father, leader, and friend that I was created to become.

Here is where I am going with this whole thing; sometimes the greatest lessons we teach are not in our moments of perfection but rather in how we handle our failing moments. I absolutely wish that what had happened didn’t, but it did…that is life. It is hard and messy sometimes. And while I will hopefully grow and mature from that experience, the greater lesson I had the opportunity to teach – through the life I live – is how to handle those failing moments.

Please give up the idea of perfection and simply show up and be real every day. Do you really want your kids, spouse, and/or friends to feel they have to be “perfect?” You aren’t, they aren’t, and none of us ever will be! It seems the wiser way to live would be to seek the Lord and the Holy Spirits leading every day, to value and appreciate every day, to live it to the best of our abilities, and, when we fail or make a mistake, own it and apologize for it. This then puts us in the perfect position to learn and grow from it.

“Kids don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are.” – Jim Henson 

“Your child will follow your example, not your advice.” – Unknown

One more thing to share… I don’t know what you all do every day to learn, to grow, to challenge yourself, to make sure your well is full of positive thoughts and ideas, etc. I want to encourage you to look into some of Jon Gordon’s stuff. You can find him on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube. Earlier this week I received his newsletter and I wanted to share it with you this morning.

10 Encouraging Messages to Stay Positive

“Mondays are a great day to focus on what we get to do instead of what we have to do. Life is a gift, not an obligation.

Three things you control every day are your attitude, your effort and your actions. It doesn’t matter what others are doing or who you think is being unfair. Every day you can focus on being positive, working hard and making others around you better.

Success is often measured by comparison to others. Excellence, on the other hand, is all about being the best we can be and maximizing our gifts, talents and abilities to perform at our highest potential. Pursue excellence today.

Failure is not meant to define you. It’s meant to refine you to be all you are meant to be. Don’t let your failures be a part of your identity. Move forward and create your future.

Don’t let negativity win today. Remember it starts with you. If you are complaining you’re not leading. If you are leading you’re not complaining. One person can’t make a team but one person can break a team. Stay positive! No energy vampires allowed.

One person in pursuit of excellence raises the standards of everyone around them. And as they strive for greatness they bring out the greatness in others. Be that one person today.

If they praise you, show up and do the work. If they criticize you, show up and do the work. If no one even notices you, just show up and do the work. Just keep showing up, doing the work, and leading the way.

Where there is a void, negativity will fill it. Fill the void with positive, proactive communication and you’ll help neutralize the negativity before it starts. This applies at home, at work and every relationship in your life.

Expect to win today. Champions expect success and their positive beliefs often lead to positive actions and outcomes. They win in their mind first.

Remember your WHY! We don’t get burned out because of what we do. We get burned out because we forget why we do it.”

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your families, and please stay well!

Kev 

Where Do You Communicate From?

 Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! I simply love the dawning of a new day, seeing the world come alive again. No matter what yesterday contained, this day, TODAY, brings hope and opportunity…we simply must choose it! 😊

Last week I had a phenomenal experience. I was copied on an email exchange between two people – kind of like eavesdropping on a conversation but I was invited in by one of them. Anyways, it wasn’t a pleasant exchange. They are both great people and it was very clear that they were both very upset. Here was the ‘aha moment;’ the one who escalated the conversation was communicating from their position of brokenness…I could so clearly see it. And as I thought about that exchange my spirit convicted me – don’t we all communicate from what is inside of us?

Where do you communicate from? Do you communicate from faith or fear? From adequacy or inadequacy? From love or hate? From strength or weakness? This could go on and on…we are all communicating from somewhere.

Let me be fully transparent and give you a personal example. As I have thought and prayed about where I communicate from, I have realized that when something scares me, my tone is very harsh, and I am very direct. Am I trying to be mean, rude, or nasty? No, I am simply communicating from fear. Last week our family was in Destin, FL for a week…such a blessed time! One day we went riding Wave Runners. As you, and I, would expect, one of the boys decided to try to splash my Beautiful Bride and I with their Wave Runner. Look, I watched the video…we are supposed to maintain a safe riding distance! The only problem is it is nearly impossible to splash someone from “a safe riding distance.” So, what does my guy do? Well, he comes flying up at a very UNsafe riding distance, scaring the [insert your own word here] out of me! So, I yelled at him, told him how stupid that was, and told him to never do that again. And then I immediately felt remorse. We are out here having fun, I got the heck scared out of me, and then I spoke in a way I would not normally speak. I had communicated from fear. Now, I am not saying I was wrong for being upset, but I digress… 😊

I want to challenge all of us to really think and pray about this one. Another example of, “what’s in the well always comes up in the bucket.” I can have every intention of speaking positive, uplifting, encouraging words however if what is really inside is hurt, broken, challenged, etc., I can have all the intentions in the world, I will fail every time.

I think, for me, this also puts a little more perspective around “hurting people hurt people.” Does not mean they want to or intend to…simply means that what is inside of them is hurt. Not easy to hear, pretty easy to understand and see. Wisdom would be to give the same grace we would want if we were in the same situation.

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well!

Kev

A Couple of Things

Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you having a great day as a glorious new day has dawned on the Emerald Coast! This day right here is going to be a special one! 😊

This morning I just want to quickly share a couple of things I read this week.

The first piece I want share comes from the devotional Waiting On God by Charles F. Stanley. It has been a great daily devotional and I would strongly recommend it to you. The specific excerpt I am sharing comes from day 3. It states:

 “Do you know who it is you’re waiting for? Someone may say, “I’m hoping for an employer to notice my resume.” Another person might add, “I’m waiting for a spouse,” or, “I’m anticipating having a child.” We tend to focus on the object of our desire, rather than the Provider. But really – no matter who or what the subject of your petitions – the One you’re actually waiting for is God. 

You’re hoping He’ll answer your prayers. You’re expecting Him to supply the solution to your problems. You’re awaiting His intervention. After all, the reality is, “Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights,” (James 1:17). It’s the Lord Himself who provides all things for you.

Waiting signifies an expectant endurance that’s demonstrated by a directed, purposeful, active, and courageous attitude of prayer. That expectant endurance means we won’t make a move without the Lord’s guidance. And that first characteristic of godly prayer in waiting – being directed toward God – is what we’ll take a look at in today’s devotion. Rather than concentrating on what we’re waiting for, we’ll focus on the Father, who has the best plan for our lives.

Ultimately, no matter what you’re waiting for, you’re better prepared and suited for it if you’re centered on God. Why? Because when you focus on what you lack, it inspires despair in your heart. You obsess over your own limitations, which reinforces the bondage within you. Remember, you sin when you try to meet your needs in your own way rather than the Lord’s. So as you fixate on what you don’t have, you enslave yourself more to the sin nature, which eventually leads to destruction (Romans 6: 23). It’s a disheartening and vicious cycle.

But when you single-mindedly set your sights on God, you realize the incredible strength, wisdom, and power that are being employed on your behalf. You have confidence because the Lord knows and provides what’s absolutely best for you. And because He’s unaffected by the obstacles that limit and intimidate you, your reasons to fear disappear (Isaiah 41:10).

Friend, the Lord God is faithful. If He makes a promise, He’ll certainly keep it. Don’t miss the principle because it’s one of the most important lessons you can ever learn about your ability to wait on Him – it’s based completely on your understanding of who He is and the relationship you build together.”

The second piece I want to share comes from the book, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. The excerpts I am going to share come from Chapter 5, The Fourth Agreement.

“Always do your best.”

 “Under any circumstance, always do your best, no more and no less.”

“Regardless of the quality, keep doing your best – no more and no less than your best.”

“When you always do your best, you take action. Doing your best is taking the action because you love it, not because you’re expecting a reward.”

“When you do your best you learn to accept yourself. But you have to be aware and learn from your mistakes. Learning from your mistakes means you practice, look honestly at the results, and keep practicing. This increases your awareness.”

“Expressing what you are is taking action. You can have many great ideas in your head, but what makes the difference is the action. Without action upon an idea, there will be no manifestation, no results, and no reward.”

Let us not forget who we are waiting for, and let’s do our best in every moment of the waiting! 😊

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well! I am off to the beach to play! 😊

Kev

What Fruit Looks Like

 Happy Friday, Friends! 

I hope and trust this post finds you having a great day as a glorious – truly beautiful! – new day has dawned in my Sweet Home Alabama! There is such beauty in a new day…literally and metaphorically! 😊 

I love the YouVersion Bible app. If you don’t already have it, I want to offer it my highest recommendation. I am currently doing a Bible Study titled Fruit of the Spirit. The study was put together by the YouVersion team and their descriptions of the first 6 fruits of the spirit are awesome! I find them affirming, challenging, and inspiring! This morning I simply want to share them with all of you. Enjoy! 😊

“Love is the selfless, giving, devoted love of God and others. It’s an active display and compels us to put others’ needs above our own. Love honors others and celebrates truth no matter how difficult it is to hear it. It gives of self even when it doesn’t feel like it. Love doesn’t allow feelings to dictate its choices. Love is hopeful, persevering, and trusting. Loving people keep hatred, apathy, and self-preservation far from them.

Joy is a deep and enduring state of our soul that no circumstance, event, or human can steal away from us. It’s delighting in God and choosing to rejoice in all things. Because our circumstances don’t rule us, our mood swings are nonexistent. This doesn’t mean we are always in a “good mood” but we can remain in an unexplainable place of contentment. Joyful people don’t allow misery, sorrow, sadness, or despair to rule their thoughts or guide their actions.

Peace is a deep well of confidence that God is who He is and that He will do what He says He will do. Peace comes from resting in the promises of God. It’s choosing to work with others for a common goal instead of insisting on our own way. Peace is often unexplainable and incomprehensible, but we know when we have it and know when we don’t. Peaceful people don’t go to war with their actions or words for they know that brings no relief to any situation.

Patience is exhibiting calmness during the midst of stressful situations. It’s showing empathy toward others when they are not doing things to our standard. Patience is produced when we support the growth in others as they are on their own journey in life. It’s not getting easily disgruntled when a delay occurs that won’t matter in 10 years, let alone 10 days. Patient people don’t become easily annoyed, agitated, nor do they show intolerance.

Kindness is being genuinely kind to anyone and everyone. It assumes that all people deserve kindness no matter the differences, viewpoints, or cultures. Kindness celebrates others and serves when there is a need. It looks out for the well-being of others and shows compassion when needed. It assists others and shows courtesy and benevolence to anyone. Kind people do not display animosity, ill will, or envy toward others.

Goodness is truly desiring to help others. It doesn’t approach or entertain sin. Goodness does the right thing and challenges other people to do the same, even if the conversation is uncomfortable. It is decent, honest, moral, honorable, virtuous, and full of integrity. Good people don’t just do the right thing; they make things right.”

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well!

Kev