Blessings

 Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day on this beautiful, glorious, day in my Sweet Home Alabama! 😊 Additionally, I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

I want to share a little bit about my last two days…

Wednesday I wanted to get all of my Christmas decorations up. Landry, my youngest Tender Warrior, very kindly got all the decorations out of the attic for me so on Wednesday I could get going first thing. Additionally, my Beautiful Bride, Kathy, had gone to the store to get new, colored, lights for us to hang on the house. So, on Wednesday morning I got up, did my normal morning routine, hit a workout, and got going a little before 8:00 a.m. Throughout the day Landry ran tons of errands – to get lunch, to get a 26’ extension ladder so I could get lights to the highest peak on the house this year (finally!!!), and to the store to get propane and fire wood so we could have a fire and portable heaters when neighbors came over to sit out on the front drive and visit. Kathy was busy doing all kinds of different things to prepare our house for a family filled weekend. Payton came over after doing some work and did the lights on all of the bushes. I was up and down the ladder all day putting up lights on the house. At about 4:30 p.m. we were finished. We had dinner together and then went out front to start the fire and wait for our neighbors to arrive. Throughout the night 3 different sets of neighbors stopped by to visit and we waved to numerous others as they drove by. At about 10:00 p.m., the last neighbor left, the fire had burned out, we put everything away, and we came into the house exhausted but exhilarated from an extraordinary day. It was a lot however we had done it all together. 😊

Yesterday morning we got up, had a quick snack, and Kathy, Payton, and I went to a 5K Run (that would be Payton!) and a 1-mile Fun Run/Walk (that would be Kathy and me! 😊). We had a wonderful time! After the race we came back home, ate a quick lunch, and then all took a nap. After waking up, Payton and I got ready and headed to Oxford, MS for the Egg Bowl – the rivalry game between Ole Miss and Mississippi State. Payton and I have made it a goal to visit a different SEC stadium every year and we chose to go to this game this year. With the game being on Thanksgiving, we decided as a family that we would celebrate our Thanksgiving today – Friday. Payton and I took off at about 12:30 p.m. We had a wonderful drive to Oxford. We talked about life, family, hopes, struggles, etc. We called Grandma and Grandpa. We called Uncle Phil. We called Gehrig, the only Tender Warrior I did not get to see yesterday, and talked to him and his sweet girlfriend, Ila. We got to Oxford 3 hours before kickoff, just as we had planned. We quickly found parking and then walked to The Grove – the large tailgating area at Ole Miss. It was everything we could have imagined! We, quiet accidentally, ran into the Rebel Walk or Walk of Champions – I am not sure what they call it however it is when the team arrives and walks through a tunnel of fans. It was awesome! After the walk we headed toward the stadium. We stopped at a team shop and got me a Ole Miss hat – much to my Beautiful Bride’s dismay (I say that tongue in cheek, she is very supportive), I buy a hat at each of these stadiums that Payton and I go to together. We then went into the stadium, found another team shop, and bought Payton an Ole Miss shirt (yes, he always gets a shirt on our adventures). We then got dinner – Grove Burgers and water – and then headed to our seats. We had so much fun and saw a very good game (Mississippi State won 24 – 22). Right after the game we headed back to the truck, hopped in and drove right back home. We got home at 1:15 a.m. this morning. Another day ended as the day before had – exhausted and exhilarated.

As I write this Happy Friday, my house and heart are full. Landry is taking a nap – he camped out last night and was duck hunting at first light this morning. Gehrig and Payton are in the living room watching the World Cup match between USA and England. My Beautiful Bride is putting the finishing touches on our Thanksgiving dinner. The smells of turkey, ham, and stuffing fill the house. My precious fur babies are wondering everywhere, hoping somebody will give them a bite of something! 😊

So, what is my point? I truly believe that what matters most in this life are people and the relationships we have with them. Has everything been “perfect”? No. There were challenges and struggles in putting up the decorations. And yes, we get frustrated with each other. It wasn’t ideal to be leaving Kathy alone on Thanksgiving while Payton and I drove to Oxford. It would have been great to be able to spend time with Gehrig. And we didn’t get to celebrate Thanksgiving when everyone else did. Having said that, I honestly don’t think I would have changed a thing. We all get to make choices and there are consequences to every choice we make. I wanted my house ready for Christmas and I got to do that with my family. I wanted to visit with my neighbors and I got to do that. Payton and I had chosen this game, we discussed it with the family, and we all knew how we would celebrate our Thanksgiving. As I reflect, the greatest choice I think I made over the last few days was to be fully present AND fully engaged. Whatever I was doing I was there – physically and mentally! I want to encourage you to do the same. Yes, there were times when my mind wanted to wonder or I wanted to think if I should be doing something else. And each time, I pushed back those thoughts and chose to be who I was with, doing what I was doing.

We all have blessings, countless things to be grateful for, if only we will take the time to see and enjoy them. THAT is my hope and prayer for each one of us – that we would recognize and genuinely appreciate each blessing, every day…not just one day per year.

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious family and every moment with them, and please stay well!

Now, I am going to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family! 😊

Kev

For You Not To You

 Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! 😊

Earlier this week I started a new Bible Study titled Trust In The Trials: A 5-Day Plan For Hope In The Hard Times by Susie O’Neal. It came flying out the gate!! I want to share an excerpt from Day 1 which is titled, Bind My Wandering Heart to Thee. Here is the excerpt:

“But what if the trials, hardships, struggles, and detours were actually for your good?

What if these difficult seasons were meant to help you destroy idols buried in your heart? What if God needed you to make mistakes and suffer hardships to mold you, grow you, and sanctify you into the mature believer he has called you to be? What if all of these things happened for you not to you?

Perhaps the trial feels never ending because instead of growing better, you pulled away and became bitter. Every season of life, the highs and the lows, are all needed for you to learn to give grace more freely, to forgive others more easily, to show compassion more deeply, to protect others more boldly, to soften hearts more humbly, and to love unconditionally.”

Pretty profound perspective shift, isn’t it?

“For you not to you” – Does this make everything better and go away? No. But it does change the way we look at whatever it is we are going through. I have also heard it said, “Instead of asking, ‘why me?’ ask ‘what is this trying to teach me?’” Shifting our perspective can shift our attitude which will change how we experience whatever it is we are going through.

“Trial feels never ending…” – Ever been there? Where you were bitter? Yeah, me too. And as I sit back and reflect, I realize that it was only after I let the bitterness go that I was able to learn and grow from the situation/circumstance.

“Every season of life, the highs and the lows, are all needed…” – Would any of us choose to go through the lows? I would guess not. However, again as I reflect, I see that it was in those seasons that I did learn and grow the most. And, somewhat strangely, there is a peace in my spirit when I realize they are all needed. Instead of the self-defeating talk, I realize that they were necessary steps to me becoming the man, husband, Dad, leader, and friend that I am today. And most assuredly, there will be opportunities to learn and grow in the future.

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, a Happy Thanksgiving, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well!

Kev

Learning

 Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day, Veteran’s Day, begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! This is going to be a special day! Not only do we get to honor all those who have served our country in the military, we also get to pursue all we were created to become, and we get to love, care for, and serve everyone we cross paths with today! It’s a blank canvas, Friends…let’s make it a masterpiece!

This week I am going to share from two different podcasts I have listened to this week. They are loaded with great information and while I will share some of what I heard, I would encourage you to listen to the full podcasts yourself.

The first one I want to talk about is from the podcast At The Table with Patrick Lencioni. It originally aired on November 9, 2022, and it is titled, Everyone’s Got Stuff. You can find the podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everyones-got-stuff/id1474171732?i=1000585623876 Here is a quick summary:

·        We all have faults, failures, hang-ups, addictions, problems, etc.

·        Sharing them does two things:

o   Acknowledging them makes us more human which makes us more relatable to others.

o   Acknowledging them gives others the opportunity to help us.

So, let’s just talk about this for a minute. First, it is absolutely true…. we all have stuff! We all have insecurities, fears, problems, addictions, etc. Despite what we may see, or think we see, on social media, nobody is perfect. So, if you hear nothing else, please know that you are not alone. Your feelings, problems, and challenges are not unique, everyone has them. Please stop the self-defeating talk, acknowledge your issue, and commit to working to overcome them.

Please know that people relate more to our issues than they do to our (perceived) perfections. You see, we all know that we have stuff however when we see someone that we think is perfect, we don’t feel we can relate to them. Let’s not be THAT person, the one that tries to look, act, and be perfect all the time. If you have ever been around someone like that, you know how hard it is to relate to them. Let’s just keep it real! Let’s just be our pure, authentic selves…warts and all!

Let’s extend the grace to others that we wish were extended to us. No, it does not mean others will reciprocate however that is not the point…we are not trying to live their lives, we are trying to live ours. If we are simply ourselves, we give others permission to do the same. What would this world look like if we just valued and appreciated ourselves and others? If we acknowledged our stuff and strived to become all that we are capable of becoming, and helped others do the same? We can’t control anyone else however we can choose how we live…let’s live differently.

Bottom line…we all have stuff! We can choose to live authentically, or we can exhaust ourselves trying to hide our stuff and judging others. The lives we live will be determined by whatever choice we make.

The second podcast was on Focus on the Family. The title was Setting Boundaries in Your Most Difficult Relationships (Part 2 of 2), and the guest was Lysa TerKeurst. You can find the full podcast here: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/episodes/broadcast/setting-boundaries-in-your-most-difficult-relationships-part-2-of-2/

I want to start off by sharing an excerpt from the transcript of the podcast. This is an exchange between Lysa and the host, Jim Daly.

Jim: Lysa, fear can prevent us from creating healthy boundaries. The fear of what a person might think if we do this, uh, you know, whatever it might be, but we draw, we pull in from doing the healthy thing that we could do. I, I see that a bit in my own boys, you know, confrontation is not a comfortable thing for them. How do we, either in our marital relationship, or in our parenting journey, how do we help our spouse, help ourselves, help our kids not have that fear of engaging people like this with real, firm boundaries?

Lysa: Well, I think sometimes when we think about communicating a boundary, it feels like we’re, we’re having to operate in the extremes and extremes feel so comfortable. Like, you know, we can never have this happen again or, you know, you always do this. And so always encourage people avoid the extremes and recognize that the boundary conversations don’t have to be awful. I mean, if somebody makes a request of you that would extend you past the capacity that you have, then we can have a gentle conversation and say, “My heart says, yes, yes, yes, but the reality of my time says, no.” And here’s the deal, we’re already doing this really well. So, I’m gonna prove to you, Jim, you’re already doing this really well, are you ready?

Jim: Mm-hmm.

Lysa: Do you have a bank account?

Jim: Yes.

Lysa: Um, do you have a passcode on your bank account?

Jim: I believe I do. (laughs)

Lysa: Okay. Even if you can’t remember it right now, you have some sort of security-

Jim: Correct.

Lysa: So that not everyone can get to your bank account.

Jim: Yes.

Lysa: Um, would you feel comfortable right now just sharing your bank account information and your passcode and everything just to give all of us free access to your bank account?

Jim: Absolutely not.

Lysa: Why? Is it because you’re unchristian? Is it because you’re selfish? Why, why, why won’t you just share it?

Jim: Because it’s none of your business. (laughs)

Lysa: Exactly, right? And I would suspect because you don’t know if we’re all gonna be responsible with the limited resources that you have in your account and you know that you have responsibilities that your limited resources need to handle, right? And it’s not because you’re unkind or unchristian, it’s because you have limit, you have a limited capacity and it’s because you’re human. Only God has a limitless supply.

Jim: Hm.

Lysa: And so of course we wouldn’t give free access to everyone because we don’t know if they will be responsible with that access. We know this with our finances, but we forget it with all other areas of capacity in our life. And so, I think it’s a really healthy exercise even before we attempt the hard conversations to have a logical sit down with yourself and define what is my capacity in this area, in this area, in this area, so that when requests are made that hyper extend us past our reasonable capacity, of course always allowing the Lord to grow us and develop us, but we can simply have a logical conversation. It doesn’t have to be so emotional.

I would love to do that. My heart says yes, yes, yes, but the reality of my time makes this a no. Now, I can’t give that, but here’s what I can give.

Interesting, isn’t it? There are a few key things I want to share.

What kept running through my mind is we all have time, talent, and treasure – we all have different levels of each, however every one of us has some time, some talent, and some treasure. Lysa nailed several key points:

·        We all have capacity in each area. None of us have unlimited time, talent, or treasure. With time, we can never get it back. With talent, we can’t be everywhere and do everything. With treasure, while we can make more, a greater impact is made if we focus in one, two, or three areas as opposed to ten, twenty, or thirty areas. We all have a capacity, and it is not unlimited.

·        We also all have responsibilities. We have things that must be done. When we make a withdrawal of time, talent, and/or treasure for something that is a responsibility, we have lowered our capacity for other things. We must honor our responsibilities and set boundaries for other things.

·        It was very interesting how Lysa stated, “we wouldn’t give free access to everyone because we don’t know if they will be responsible with that access.” Super easy to understand with our bank accounts, right? How about our time? Should we give free access to everyone with our time? Ironically, it is the one thing we have that we will never get back. I could make a great argument that time is more valuable than money…you can make more money, you get no more time. You are literally exchanging your life when you give of your time. We would be wise to insist that people be responsible with their access to our time.

Let’s be thoughtful, Friends. Let’s measure the capacity and let’s count the cost. Setting boundaries does not mean we are unchristian or selfish. It means we are wise, and it will empower us to pursue all we were created to become, and to love, care for, and serve others. We will simply be doing it in a healthy way.

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you anyway I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well!

And to our veterans, from the bottom of my heart, thank you!

Kev 

Do You Know?

 Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! This day is going to be a great one, a masterpiece! I fully intend to empty this one of its potential by pursuing my purpose and loving, care for, and serving every person I am blessed to cross paths with today! My sincere hope and prayer for you is that you will choose the same! 😊

Earlier this week I listened to a Craig Groeschel podcast titled, Who Do You Think You Are, Part 2: Masterpiece. It first aired on February 21, 2011, and it is absolutely phenomenal! I loved this podcast so much, it spoke to my heart so profoundly, that I shared it with my family and men’s group. It only makes sense that I would share it with all of you as well! 😊

I want to encourage you to listen to the podcast yourself. You can find it here https://www.life.church/media/who-do-you-think-you-are/masterpiece. It is 36 minutes long and it is packed with incredible, Godly, wisdom. I am now going to spend the rest of this Happy Friday sharing the notes I took from it with you.

·       Pastor Groeschel’s sermon is based on Ephesians 2 beginning with verse 1.

·       Without Christ, there is something wrong with you.

o   Sinful

o   Spiritually dead

o   The focus of Gods wrath

·       At any moment, when God shows up, things change.

·       When you know who you are, you will know what to do…you are God’s masterpiece

·       We are not saved by our good works but we are saved to do good things for the one who saved us.

·       You are a masterpiece created for the masters purpose.

·       I am God’s masterpiece, made in Christ Jesus to do what God created me to do.

·       Three thoughts:

o   As God’s masterpiece you are created for the Masters purpose/You were created to bring glory to Him/ God decided at this moment in time you would serve Him best/ The problem for most is they don’t think they are a masterpiece and they don’t know their purpose/ When you don’t understand the purpose of a thing, all you can do is abuse a thing/ You don’t ask a thing its purpose, you ask the one who created the thing – Go to God.

o   As God’s masterpiece you have everything you need to do, everything that God wants you to do/ 2 Peter 1:3 – God’s divine power has given you everything you need/ The problem is so many people have masterpiece envy – when they look at other people and want what they have/ They focus on what they can’t do, not what they can do/ Don’t look at what you can’t do, look at what you can do.

o   As God’s masterpiece God uses everything in your life to bring about his purposes/ Romans 8:28 – we know that in ALL THINGS

·       If you don’t like yourself, let God remake you.

O.K. Masterpieces, I know this is short and, more than anything else, I simply hope that the notes I have shared spark your interest enough that you go listen to the podcast. All I know is that you are valuable, indescribably so! God loved you and I enough that He sent His one and only begotten Son to die for our sins so that we may have a pathway to have a relationship with Him – to live this life as the masterpiece we were created to be, to bring glory and honor to Him through the lives we live, and to spend eternity in heaven. And He loves us enough that He will let us make our own choices! 😊

One final thought: Our pastor, Steve Huskey, made a statement in church last Sunday that was very profound to me…I had never thought of it the way he presented it. He said, “We are all going to live into eternity, it is simply a matter of where.” Think about it…

Please don’t hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.blogspot.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well!

Kev