Leading by Example

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day! A beautiful May day is dawning...so incredible, so peaceful, such a blessing!

This weeks "Happy Friday" is much more of a reminder than anything else. Earlier this week I was listening to the radio, the announcer was telling the story about a young boy who had donated some of his money to a cause and the announcer said, "so many of our young people are leading by example." Almost immediately my heart spoke to me - we are all leading by example.

Can we please establish something right off the bat Friends? We are all leading by example. It is not if or when - we are. So many of us are always getting ready to live, getting ready to do this or that when in reality we are living this life right now and the things we say and do provide an example for other people. We are all leading by example each and every day. It is not a question of whether or not we will lead by example; it is a question of what our example will be. Good or bad, positive or negative, life giving or life taking...what is our example?

For such a simple thought there sure is a whole lot to unpack.

It would really be great if we could all pick the date, time, situation, etc. when we will be an example. Think about it; wouldn't it be awesome if I told you that on May 2, 2014 at 10:15 a.m. someone is going to be watching you and the things you say and do in that moment are going to be the example by which you lead. We would make sure we looked good, we would try really hard to say the "right" things, we would undoubtedly be on our best behavior. Life doesn't work that way. Life is in fact a 24/7 deal and someone is always watching. It is interesting to me that we can do the same thing over and over again - leading by example - and nobody says anything - don't mistake this for them not taking notice by the way! Then, when adversity strikes, a challenge is presented, etc., and we continue to do the same thing someone will say something like, "when I saw you do this in that situation, it really spoke to my heart." The great irony of our example; we want it to be perfect - at the perfect moment, in the perfect time, with us looking and feeling perfect. The reality is it is the example we are leading with when everything is going wrong, falling apart that speaks the most powerfully to others. A couple of things with this:

• We all want to "pass the test" when the test comes however we don't necessarily always know when the test is coming. It is the things you and I do on a daily basis that determine our example, that determines how we will react in the moment. It is easy to say, do and be the right things when everything is perfect. It is however who we really are, what we truly believe, think and do that is revealed when adversity - however you want to define adversity - strikes.
• Tied directly to the previous point, others wait to see us in that moment because they too know that it is only in the trials, struggles, adversities that who we really are is revealed. A colleague and I were just talking about this earlier this week; there is a great quote that says, "it takes an hour to establish your reputation and a year to reveal your character." We can all fake it - say, do & be the "right" thing - for a moment however we will not consistently be able to do this for an extended period of time. Sooner or later life happens and when that moment comes we will lead by example with who we really are. None of us can escape it.

Now as I though about this "Happy Friday" and the statement "you are leading by example" two words came to mind - condemnation & conviction. So often when we make a statement like "you are leading by example" it is stated in the spirit of condemnation. That is not the intent of this "Happy Friday." No, the statement is made in the spirit of conviction.

• Condemnation - the expression of very strong disapproval; censure. Condemnation says you have failed or you are failing. It makes you feel bad about yourself, defeated. It insinuates that you have or are failing. There is not much hope in condemnation.
• Conviction - a firmly held belief or opinion. It is an awakening, the raising of awareness. It speaks life and hope. It inspires you to become all that you were created to become. It oozes hope.

When I say to you, "you are leading by example," I have no desire to condemn. My desire is to greatly inspire. Without question each and every one of us - yes, all of us! - lead with some good examples and some bad examples. We all have good and bad in us...we are human in a fallen, broken world. My hope is that we will build upon our good examples and learn from and modify our bad examples - not be defeated by them.

You are leading by example and so am I. Each and every day the things we pour into our lives - the things we read, listen to, think, say & do - will determine what those examples will be. There is no escaping the fact that our examples will speak to the lives of others...most loudly and clearly at moments that you & I would not consider to be our best. You and I will choose the things we think, say & do and thus choose our example(s). Let us be led by the convictions of our hearts and never stop striving to fulfill the greatness that resides within each and every one of us.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev