Happy Friday Friends!!!
I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great Friday and an awesome week is coming to a close for you.
There have been a lot of heart-felt conversations in the Haslam's lives over the course of the past few weeks. After 7 blessed years of being at Arizona State University and living where Kathy and I grew up, near family and with friends - old & new, we are now going on a wonderful adventure to Texas. This has led to several conversations with family and friends that we love so very much...but are they goodbye's?
I think we could probably argue over the word "goodbye" for quite a while and, as is the case with most words, it is useless. The word itself, the description we have assigned to something, means nothing. As with everything in life, I believe, it comes down to the true intent of the heart.
My best friend in this world lives 1,556.6 miles from me according to Google Maps. I have not seen him in person in more than 3 years...I think. He knows my greatest strengths, my greatest weaknesses, my victories & my failures. When I am troubled, worried, making a decision, etc., he is one of the first people I contact. There is never more than a two week time frame where I won't call him or he will call me. Sometimes I don't get to talk to him at all. I get his voicemail and I leave a message telling him that I love him and I am proud of him...and it is enough for both of us - my heart is full. We have not lived near each other in more than 15 years and yet when I talk about Uncle Mark my Beautiful Bride and my Tender Warriors know exactly who I am talking about, they know what is going on in his life, his wife's life and in the lives of his precious children. It is a condition of the heart, a desire to be close, to keep the relationship close, no matter the miles or time.
It strikes me as so ironic. Some are physically present for their family, for their friends and yet their families and friends long for them. Their families and friends would give anything if they would be present, have a real conversation with them, if they would care. And yet these precious blessings - family & friends - walk in and out the door every day, physically present and yet so desperate for true love. I am sorry Friends, these are not the types of relationships I have a desire to have or have tried to create. I want real, meaningful, heart to heart relationships, whether physically present or not.
I don't believe physical location has to determine the strength, depth or breadth of our relationships. Sure, it is great to be able to see them, to hug them, to go out to eat with them...especially on Burger Friday (I might need to trademark that!)! :) However this is not what gives our relationships meaning. What does matter greatly is the intentions, the condition of our hearts. A heart filled with love for another will go to great lengths to grow the relationship, to continue to invest in the life of the other, to be there for another through the good and bad times...no matter the miles. It is not the physical presence that builds the relationship, it is the heart. And the reality is, if it is a truly desperate situation that requires my physical presence, I am highly confident that Mark in Alabama, Stephen in Mississippi, Leroy in Kansas, Steve in Michigan, Rob & AJ in Arizona - to just give you a few examples - know to the depths of their core that I will be there as soon as humanly possible.
Have you ever thought of this; perhaps God moves us to perform His work, to fulfill the purpose He has for our lives? You see, I met Mark in Nebraska, Stephen in Arizona, Leroy in Kansas, Steve in Illinois, Rob & AJ here in AZ - at two very different times in my life in two separate locations. Each man is a God fearing & pursuing man and I look back at times in my life where each of them individually stepped up, spoke truth into my life and helped me grow as a man, husband and/or father. Had I refused to move when God wanted to move me, if I had dug my heels in the sand and said no, the list would end at Mark. I met every other man, I grew in so many ways, the season in life, that Mark and I physically shared together. It is kind of funny when I look at it that way. I can't imagine what my life would look like, how I would have grown in the ways I have grown - not to mention how sore Mark's back would be from carrying me all these years! - if I hadn't moved. Was it hard at that time? Was I sad? Did I cry? Yes, Yes & Yes! Growth and maturity is a wonderful thing...it gives perspective. My relationship with Mark is better, healthier & stronger than it was when we left one another physically 15 some years ago (note to Mark - Bro, we are getting old!!) and I have been so blessed by these other men that God so perfectly placed in my life. Truth of the matter is, I wouldn't want to go back to any time or any place because I would have to give up parts of who I am now, what God has done and is doing in my life now, to do so. Think about it...
There are two things I want to share to end this Happy Friday that I am not quite sure how to end:
1. Is there someone, perhaps several someone's, that you have said goodbye to when you
didn't really mean to say goodbye? Again Friend, I am talking about the heart. You know,
the one's that you meant to call, that you have thought about but, you know, too much
time has passed? Let me let you in on a secret; if you have not breathed your final breath,
it is not too late. Pick up the phone, go see them...whatever works for you. It might be
awkward at first but I promise you that you will not regret it. Don't let the thoughts of
coulda, shoulda & woulda haunt you. Chop their legs right out from underneath
them. Reach out to that family member or friend.
2. I am not a goodbye kinda guy. To any of my personal friends out there who happen to
read this, please know that you are stuck with me! When I loved you with my words and
my actions this came from a very pure-hearted, authentic place. I can't just shut this off
because my physical location will now be Texas. I still love you and will continue to do so.
I will be intentional with my phone calls, texts, emails...whatever I have to do to reach
you, to let you know I am thinking about you, that I care about you and that I believe in
you...with all of my heart. I look forward to our relationships continuing to grow and I
thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for blessing my life so, so richly.
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.
Kev
Friday, June 20, 2014
Friday, June 13, 2014
Fatherhood
Happy Friday Friends!
I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day on this beautiful Friday morning! I truly cherish this time...as a new day dawns. Everything is new and fresh again. There are no faults, failures, mistakes; just renewal, hope, opportunity, promise. The first light is beginning to appear, the birds are starting to wake up, soon the city will start coming alive with the buzz of traffic - just a blessed time, inspiring.
Men being real men, husbands & fathers - the men, husbands & fathers that God created (perfectly equipped by the way, lacking nothing...think about that!) them to become, has long been the passion of my heart. I do not say that in a critical, condemning spirit, I say it with a heart to encourage, empower & equip them to do so. I personally believe that the greatest challenges in our world are directly tied to men failing to fulfill their purpose, failing to fulfill their responsibilities and, far to often, running from them. We have a world filled with men trying to prove they are men by doing childish things, daughters desperately trying to figure out what a real man, the love of a real man looks like, boys desperately wanting a role model, someone to truly show them how to fulfill their God ordained purpose as a man, husband & father. So many lives have been lost, there is so much pain, there is so much brokenness, there is so much despair, because men fail to rise up and become the men, husbands & fathers that they were created to become.
As we approach this Father's Day weekend I want to share some excerpts from Tong Dungy's book UNcommon as well as some quotes. Before doing so however I want to share a few thoughts:
1. As you read these things - man or woman - perhaps you will notice that a man, husband
and/or father in your life is fulfilling this sacred calling...thank him. Let him know that
you notice. That while he does have moments of failure - everyone one of us does! - you
recognize that he does strive to pursue the greatness that is within him, that he and his
efforts are recognized, valued & appreciated.
2. Perhaps you know a man, husband and/or father who is not currently pursuing his
greatness, his calling. I want to encourage you to share this with him. Do not convict him
when sharing, allow his spirit to do that...it is much more powerful than you anyways!
Simply let him know that you believe in him and you thought he might enjoy reading it.
3. To the men, husbands & fathers - today is a new day. Your past mistakes, faults, failures,
etc. are in the, well, past. You have a choice today what this day will be. Perhaps you have
failed to meet your responsibilities as a man, a husband or father right up until this
moment...let it go. You cannot change the past however you can change this moment, this
day. You can choose to be a real man, to honor your responsibilities, to be accountable for
your words and actions. You can choose to be a real husband, to love, honor, lead &
respect your wife. You can choose to be a real dad, to love, honor, lead & respect the
precious souls who call you "Daddy." I don't care if you are 18, 48 or 98. I don't care if you
have failed at every one of these responsibilities every time right up until now...you can
choose to be different. And know this, you will make a choice - one way or the other. Pick
up the phone, better yet, go see the person. Pour out your heart and then walk your talk. I
do not propose that it will be easy...nothing of any value is easy! I promise you however
that you will not regret it. The final thing I want you to know: I believe in you. I know you
can become the man, the husband and the father God created you to become. How do I
know? Because I know the One who created you and I can testify to the transforming
power He possesses.
First, I would like to share some excerpts from UNcommon by Tony Dungy with Nathan Whitaker.
And today, fatherhood remains one of the critical foundations for the health of our current generation and for those that will follow.
It seems that it has almost become perfectly acceptable to not be a part of your child's life as long as you meet your financial responsibilities.
Be there for your children!
Studies have shown that the father's relationship with his daughter will be the primary predictor in the success of her marriage, relationships with men, and her sexual behavior prior to marriage. In particular, the research shows that if she isn't treated well by her father, or has no father in the home to nurture her, love her, and make her feel secure, she will attempt to fill that void through relationships with other men. As for our sons, if there is no father to model proper behavior for them, they will never learn what it means to be a man or a father.
Just because you've erred doesn't mean you're out of the running to be a good dad. The Bible wasn't written for those who have it figured out, but instead it is God's Word to those of us who are muddling through life. We must remember that "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God," but we have been given the freedom through Christ to forget the past and look forward to what lies ahead as we "press on to reach the end of the race."
Here's something to think about: How do you speak to your children? What we say is terribly important.
James 3: 3 - 6 says this: We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in his mouth. And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire.
Our words can uplift and heal and empower - or not. Words can inspire, rekindle a sense of wonder, and provide direction, or they can dampen spirits, condemn ideas, and destroy initiative.
Just know that your children are always looking for affirmation, for the knowledge that they matter - to you - even when their behavior would indicate otherwise.
Your children need you to affirm and encourage them.
Be intentional with your words.
In addition to looking for opportunities to lift your children up with your words, great care should be taken in watching what you do. Your children are more observant and perceptive than you think.
Our children are smart - they will notice if we are living lives that are inconsistent with what we're saying and teaching.
...sometimes the best thing we can do as parents is to be quiet. Our children need to know that we're always there for them, no matter what.
When was the last time you set aside all the "important" things you had to do and followed your children to wherever they wanted to go? Have they asked you to do something recently? Maybe you've said no so many times that they don't bother to ask anymore.
The Bible says that tomorrow is not promised to us. We need to take advantage of the opportunities we have today. Life is what happens when we're making other plans.
I don't know what's going on in your life right now. I don't know what important stuff you have in front of you. I don't know what or who is bothering you or trying to set your schedule for tomorrow or days ahead. But I wonder if we all need to do a better job of listening to that gentle whisper from a God who daily reminds us to enjoy the sacred moments with those we love - with dear friends, with those who need us, and especially with our precious children. They are moments we will look back on with either regret or smile.
Either way, the memory will last forever.
I also want to share some thought provoking quotes with you:
I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day on this beautiful Friday morning! I truly cherish this time...as a new day dawns. Everything is new and fresh again. There are no faults, failures, mistakes; just renewal, hope, opportunity, promise. The first light is beginning to appear, the birds are starting to wake up, soon the city will start coming alive with the buzz of traffic - just a blessed time, inspiring.
Men being real men, husbands & fathers - the men, husbands & fathers that God created (perfectly equipped by the way, lacking nothing...think about that!) them to become, has long been the passion of my heart. I do not say that in a critical, condemning spirit, I say it with a heart to encourage, empower & equip them to do so. I personally believe that the greatest challenges in our world are directly tied to men failing to fulfill their purpose, failing to fulfill their responsibilities and, far to often, running from them. We have a world filled with men trying to prove they are men by doing childish things, daughters desperately trying to figure out what a real man, the love of a real man looks like, boys desperately wanting a role model, someone to truly show them how to fulfill their God ordained purpose as a man, husband & father. So many lives have been lost, there is so much pain, there is so much brokenness, there is so much despair, because men fail to rise up and become the men, husbands & fathers that they were created to become.
As we approach this Father's Day weekend I want to share some excerpts from Tong Dungy's book UNcommon as well as some quotes. Before doing so however I want to share a few thoughts:
1. As you read these things - man or woman - perhaps you will notice that a man, husband
and/or father in your life is fulfilling this sacred calling...thank him. Let him know that
you notice. That while he does have moments of failure - everyone one of us does! - you
recognize that he does strive to pursue the greatness that is within him, that he and his
efforts are recognized, valued & appreciated.
2. Perhaps you know a man, husband and/or father who is not currently pursuing his
greatness, his calling. I want to encourage you to share this with him. Do not convict him
when sharing, allow his spirit to do that...it is much more powerful than you anyways!
Simply let him know that you believe in him and you thought he might enjoy reading it.
3. To the men, husbands & fathers - today is a new day. Your past mistakes, faults, failures,
etc. are in the, well, past. You have a choice today what this day will be. Perhaps you have
failed to meet your responsibilities as a man, a husband or father right up until this
moment...let it go. You cannot change the past however you can change this moment, this
day. You can choose to be a real man, to honor your responsibilities, to be accountable for
your words and actions. You can choose to be a real husband, to love, honor, lead &
respect your wife. You can choose to be a real dad, to love, honor, lead & respect the
precious souls who call you "Daddy." I don't care if you are 18, 48 or 98. I don't care if you
have failed at every one of these responsibilities every time right up until now...you can
choose to be different. And know this, you will make a choice - one way or the other. Pick
up the phone, better yet, go see the person. Pour out your heart and then walk your talk. I
do not propose that it will be easy...nothing of any value is easy! I promise you however
that you will not regret it. The final thing I want you to know: I believe in you. I know you
can become the man, the husband and the father God created you to become. How do I
know? Because I know the One who created you and I can testify to the transforming
power He possesses.
First, I would like to share some excerpts from UNcommon by Tony Dungy with Nathan Whitaker.
And today, fatherhood remains one of the critical foundations for the health of our current generation and for those that will follow.
It seems that it has almost become perfectly acceptable to not be a part of your child's life as long as you meet your financial responsibilities.
Be there for your children!
Studies have shown that the father's relationship with his daughter will be the primary predictor in the success of her marriage, relationships with men, and her sexual behavior prior to marriage. In particular, the research shows that if she isn't treated well by her father, or has no father in the home to nurture her, love her, and make her feel secure, she will attempt to fill that void through relationships with other men. As for our sons, if there is no father to model proper behavior for them, they will never learn what it means to be a man or a father.
Just because you've erred doesn't mean you're out of the running to be a good dad. The Bible wasn't written for those who have it figured out, but instead it is God's Word to those of us who are muddling through life. We must remember that "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God," but we have been given the freedom through Christ to forget the past and look forward to what lies ahead as we "press on to reach the end of the race."
Here's something to think about: How do you speak to your children? What we say is terribly important.
James 3: 3 - 6 says this: We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in his mouth. And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire.
Our words can uplift and heal and empower - or not. Words can inspire, rekindle a sense of wonder, and provide direction, or they can dampen spirits, condemn ideas, and destroy initiative.
Just know that your children are always looking for affirmation, for the knowledge that they matter - to you - even when their behavior would indicate otherwise.
Your children need you to affirm and encourage them.
Be intentional with your words.
In addition to looking for opportunities to lift your children up with your words, great care should be taken in watching what you do. Your children are more observant and perceptive than you think.
Our children are smart - they will notice if we are living lives that are inconsistent with what we're saying and teaching.
...sometimes the best thing we can do as parents is to be quiet. Our children need to know that we're always there for them, no matter what.
When was the last time you set aside all the "important" things you had to do and followed your children to wherever they wanted to go? Have they asked you to do something recently? Maybe you've said no so many times that they don't bother to ask anymore.
The Bible says that tomorrow is not promised to us. We need to take advantage of the opportunities we have today. Life is what happens when we're making other plans.
I don't know what's going on in your life right now. I don't know what important stuff you have in front of you. I don't know what or who is bothering you or trying to set your schedule for tomorrow or days ahead. But I wonder if we all need to do a better job of listening to that gentle whisper from a God who daily reminds us to enjoy the sacred moments with those we love - with dear friends, with those who need us, and especially with our precious children. They are moments we will look back on with either regret or smile.
Either way, the memory will last forever.
I also want to share some thought provoking quotes with you:
"Every dad, if he takes time out of his busy life to reflect upon his fatherhood, can learn ways to become an even better dad." - Jack Baker
"Spend time with your kids and have your own ideas about what they need. It won't take away your manhood; it will give it to you." - Louis C.K.
"The father who does not teach his son his duties is equally guilty with the son who neglects them." - Confucius
"He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it." - Clarence Budington Kelland
"My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me." - Jim Valvano
"Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown." - Unknown
"Being a father is the most important role I will ever play and if I don't do this well, no other thing I do really matters." - Unknown
"A child playing with its father screams louder, laughs harder, jumps more eagerly, puts more faith in everything." - Lydia Netzer
"...it's my responsibility to cultivate the man in my son. I can't be passive about that." - Randy Alcorn
"Father to teenage son [daughter]: "My relationship with you is more important than anything I've got to say to you." - Randy Alcorn
"Conviction is worthless unless it is converted into conduct." - Thomas Carlyle
"God gives you convictions for a reason." - Unknown
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish those precious families!
Kev
Friday, June 6, 2014
Apart or In Place
Happy Friday Friends!
I hope and trust this post finds you with a happy heart & peaceful spirit on this beautiful Friday morning!
I have 3 things I want to share with you this morning.
1. This past weekend the Haslam crew took a quick trip to Grammy's cabin in the mountains of New Mexico. From the time we arrived my littlest Tender Warrior started asking, "Dad, can we go on a hike?" After literally everything we did on Saturday - shooting pellet guns, playing horseshoes, playing croquet, mowing the grass fields...everything! - "Dad, can we go on a hike?" Early Sunday morning as we all gathered on the porch to greet the dawn of a new day, first thing he says, "Dad, can we go on a hike?" It was at this point I outlined the day - breakfast, go fishing, come back and clean the fish, lunch, take Gehrig driving, go on hike, horseshoes and a game of family croquet, dinner, collapse! Now I must confess, it didn't go over so well when I snuck a nap in between lunch and taking Gehrig driving...it was not in the plan! And guess what I woke up to? Landry's precious little smiling face looking at me and immediately saying, "Dad, are we still gonna go on our hike?"
After waking up and taking Gehrig for a drive, it was finally time to go on the hike. We decided we would walk across the road from Grammy's and head straight up the side of the mountain and then, at some point, walk sideways across it. As we were getting ready to leave Landry and I got a pleasant surprise...my Beautiful Bride would join us. As we began to walk off the porch Landry assured me that all would be well as he had his knives - 2 to be exact! - "in case there is a bear." Throughout the walk the #2 and #3 positions would change; the #1 position would never change...Landry was our leader.
We walked up the side of the mountain until Landry finally started breathing hard - Kath and I had passed that point long ago! - and then, after a quick break, we turned sideways. We went over branches, under branches, around different obstacles. I had no idea that it was so much fun to launch off of a rock back onto the path! When my Beautiful Bride would be in the #2 position, Landry would turn back, hold his little hand out to her and help her over a log. When I was in the #2 position he would turn and say, "Dad, help Mom over the branch/rock/log." Hey, I got this! We talked about different tracks we saw - and honestly, poop...bear? Deer? Elk? A couple of times I was asked what I thought would be the best route - up and around the pile of branches/rocks/logs or down and around the same. We walked and walked. We noted the beauty of looking down across the valley. We discussed different plants - none of us know what poison ivy looks like however Landry assures me he will look it up on YouTube when we get back. We had a truly amazing time.
There are two things from our hike that stick with me. First, I let Landry lead the entire time and he led well. When I told him he had done a great job of leading us...well his disposition, his posture, it was priceless. Pride oozed from every part of him. His Dad had let him lead and validated his leadership. It felt good, real good. Second, the joy is in the journey. We didn't know where we were going, how long it would take, what we would do...we just enjoyed the journey, together. Please God, help me remember these things - always.
2. I want to share a quote with you:
I have been on a journey with my job for a little more than 3 years. It hasn't been that I didn't have a job - God has blessed me and my family so richly with great people, great jobs...He has always provided for us as His word promises He will do. No, I had a job I just didn't have the job that I wanted, that I thought I was supposed to be doing. Note to self: when you use "I" that many times in a sentence you are probably getting taught a lesson by God!
I recently had an amazing opportunity presented to me that I reluctantly looked into. The problem wasn't the people or the job...the problem was that it wasn't what I thought I should be doing - those doggone "I"'s again! Anyways, God was patient with me - and placed patience in the hearts of the people I will be blessed to serve with - and let me work through this with Him. Together, with God, I searched my heart, I asked myself uncomfortable questions, I opened my mind to possibilities and, as you can imagine, it was very enlightening. Yesterday my Spirit convicted me - God wants more for me than I want for myself. Things have not, were not, falling apart. They were falling into place. Thank you Lord! Thank you for your love, mercy, grace...and patience!
3. For a number of years Kath and I would take a weekend to get away together. We would take the boys to Grandma & Grandpa's, check into a resort and spend the weekend together. We would talk about us, our relationship, our hopes, our goals, our dreams, our worries, our fears, our boys, the struggles our family is facing, the obstacles that are on the horizon, etc. In the craziness, busyness of life we had let this slide. We haven't had a weekend getaway in 3 or 4 years. On Tuesday my spirit really convicted me: my Beautiful Bride and I need to get away together. We need to rest, to make each other THE priority, to...just be together. I spoke with Kath about it and we got our reservations. I am so far beyond excited it is ridiculous. Just the thought of the time I will spend with her this weekend makes my heart happy and brings a smile to my face. The end of this work day won't get here quick enough!
When we used to tell the boys Mom & Dad were going away for the weekend together they would ask if they could come with us, they would ask how come we had to go, etc. You know what they did this time? They smiled. There has not be one whisper of complaint. When I came home with a couple of gifts I am going to give My Girl this weekend, Gehrig and Landry helped me wrap them - they did note that I wrap presents very slow though! Our kids love to see Mom & Dad love each other...it makes them feel secure. I am showing my Tender Warriors that I am fighting for my Beautiful Bride...even after 25 years of marriage. They get it and it speaks to their precious spirits.
The other thing that I have thought a lot about is, "How did we get here?" Kath and I always enjoyed our weekends together, we always came back feeling refreshed, our relationship was always stronger. We need this time...our whole family does. So how did we go 3 or 4 years without doing it. The song, "Slow Fade" comes to mind. It is a slow fade as black and white turns to grey. It was baseball games, football games, yard work...the busyness of life. It didn't take long before we knew what was right, good & healthy for us had slipped away - black and white had turned to grey.
Thank you Lord for reminding me of my #1 earthly priority and for convicting my Spirit to act! WooHoo! I get a weekend with My Girl! Do not call, text or email me...I will not respond! :) I am going to be falling in love all over again with the most beautiful - inside & out - girl in the world to me, spending hours looking into those beautiful eyes, sharing my heart and tenderly holding hers! WooHoo! Is it 5:00 p.m. yet?!
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family - except for this weekend. (O.K., I am just kidding. If you REALLY need me, I will be there for you!) I will always be willing to help you any way I can.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish those precious families.
Kev
I hope and trust this post finds you with a happy heart & peaceful spirit on this beautiful Friday morning!
I have 3 things I want to share with you this morning.
1. This past weekend the Haslam crew took a quick trip to Grammy's cabin in the mountains of New Mexico. From the time we arrived my littlest Tender Warrior started asking, "Dad, can we go on a hike?" After literally everything we did on Saturday - shooting pellet guns, playing horseshoes, playing croquet, mowing the grass fields...everything! - "Dad, can we go on a hike?" Early Sunday morning as we all gathered on the porch to greet the dawn of a new day, first thing he says, "Dad, can we go on a hike?" It was at this point I outlined the day - breakfast, go fishing, come back and clean the fish, lunch, take Gehrig driving, go on hike, horseshoes and a game of family croquet, dinner, collapse! Now I must confess, it didn't go over so well when I snuck a nap in between lunch and taking Gehrig driving...it was not in the plan! And guess what I woke up to? Landry's precious little smiling face looking at me and immediately saying, "Dad, are we still gonna go on our hike?"
After waking up and taking Gehrig for a drive, it was finally time to go on the hike. We decided we would walk across the road from Grammy's and head straight up the side of the mountain and then, at some point, walk sideways across it. As we were getting ready to leave Landry and I got a pleasant surprise...my Beautiful Bride would join us. As we began to walk off the porch Landry assured me that all would be well as he had his knives - 2 to be exact! - "in case there is a bear." Throughout the walk the #2 and #3 positions would change; the #1 position would never change...Landry was our leader.
We walked up the side of the mountain until Landry finally started breathing hard - Kath and I had passed that point long ago! - and then, after a quick break, we turned sideways. We went over branches, under branches, around different obstacles. I had no idea that it was so much fun to launch off of a rock back onto the path! When my Beautiful Bride would be in the #2 position, Landry would turn back, hold his little hand out to her and help her over a log. When I was in the #2 position he would turn and say, "Dad, help Mom over the branch/rock/log." Hey, I got this! We talked about different tracks we saw - and honestly, poop...bear? Deer? Elk? A couple of times I was asked what I thought would be the best route - up and around the pile of branches/rocks/logs or down and around the same. We walked and walked. We noted the beauty of looking down across the valley. We discussed different plants - none of us know what poison ivy looks like however Landry assures me he will look it up on YouTube when we get back. We had a truly amazing time.
There are two things from our hike that stick with me. First, I let Landry lead the entire time and he led well. When I told him he had done a great job of leading us...well his disposition, his posture, it was priceless. Pride oozed from every part of him. His Dad had let him lead and validated his leadership. It felt good, real good. Second, the joy is in the journey. We didn't know where we were going, how long it would take, what we would do...we just enjoyed the journey, together. Please God, help me remember these things - always.
2. I want to share a quote with you:
"God is in control. When you feel like everything is falling apart, it could actually be falling into place. Have faith." - Unknown
I have been on a journey with my job for a little more than 3 years. It hasn't been that I didn't have a job - God has blessed me and my family so richly with great people, great jobs...He has always provided for us as His word promises He will do. No, I had a job I just didn't have the job that I wanted, that I thought I was supposed to be doing. Note to self: when you use "I" that many times in a sentence you are probably getting taught a lesson by God!
I recently had an amazing opportunity presented to me that I reluctantly looked into. The problem wasn't the people or the job...the problem was that it wasn't what I thought I should be doing - those doggone "I"'s again! Anyways, God was patient with me - and placed patience in the hearts of the people I will be blessed to serve with - and let me work through this with Him. Together, with God, I searched my heart, I asked myself uncomfortable questions, I opened my mind to possibilities and, as you can imagine, it was very enlightening. Yesterday my Spirit convicted me - God wants more for me than I want for myself. Things have not, were not, falling apart. They were falling into place. Thank you Lord! Thank you for your love, mercy, grace...and patience!
3. For a number of years Kath and I would take a weekend to get away together. We would take the boys to Grandma & Grandpa's, check into a resort and spend the weekend together. We would talk about us, our relationship, our hopes, our goals, our dreams, our worries, our fears, our boys, the struggles our family is facing, the obstacles that are on the horizon, etc. In the craziness, busyness of life we had let this slide. We haven't had a weekend getaway in 3 or 4 years. On Tuesday my spirit really convicted me: my Beautiful Bride and I need to get away together. We need to rest, to make each other THE priority, to...just be together. I spoke with Kath about it and we got our reservations. I am so far beyond excited it is ridiculous. Just the thought of the time I will spend with her this weekend makes my heart happy and brings a smile to my face. The end of this work day won't get here quick enough!
When we used to tell the boys Mom & Dad were going away for the weekend together they would ask if they could come with us, they would ask how come we had to go, etc. You know what they did this time? They smiled. There has not be one whisper of complaint. When I came home with a couple of gifts I am going to give My Girl this weekend, Gehrig and Landry helped me wrap them - they did note that I wrap presents very slow though! Our kids love to see Mom & Dad love each other...it makes them feel secure. I am showing my Tender Warriors that I am fighting for my Beautiful Bride...even after 25 years of marriage. They get it and it speaks to their precious spirits.
The other thing that I have thought a lot about is, "How did we get here?" Kath and I always enjoyed our weekends together, we always came back feeling refreshed, our relationship was always stronger. We need this time...our whole family does. So how did we go 3 or 4 years without doing it. The song, "Slow Fade" comes to mind. It is a slow fade as black and white turns to grey. It was baseball games, football games, yard work...the busyness of life. It didn't take long before we knew what was right, good & healthy for us had slipped away - black and white had turned to grey.
Thank you Lord for reminding me of my #1 earthly priority and for convicting my Spirit to act! WooHoo! I get a weekend with My Girl! Do not call, text or email me...I will not respond! :) I am going to be falling in love all over again with the most beautiful - inside & out - girl in the world to me, spending hours looking into those beautiful eyes, sharing my heart and tenderly holding hers! WooHoo! Is it 5:00 p.m. yet?!
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family - except for this weekend. (O.K., I am just kidding. If you REALLY need me, I will be there for you!) I will always be willing to help you any way I can.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish those precious families.
Kev
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