Keepin It Real

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope & trust this post finds you all having a great day as a beautiful Saturday morning dawns! It is going to be an incredible day for the Haslam's - Landry's soccer game this morning and a massive Crawfish Boil this afternoon & evening. As my Beautiful Bride loves to say, "Texas Livin'!"

I am going to keep this Happy Friday real. Most days I sit down to write Happy Friday my Spirit is soaring, my thoughts are clear and I know exactly the words I want to share with you. This is not the case this morning, not even close. I am o.k. with that, just keepin it real. Sometimes we don't understand things, life gets confusing and hard. I do however feel compelled to write, to share some thoughts - no matter how jumbled they may be. Please give me grace. God will take care of the rest.

This week I took a business trip to Colorado. After landing I drove to the restaurant where I had my first meeting. As I was sitting there waiting for the person I was meeting with to show up Kath called me. She was calling to let me know that a friend of ours had suddenly, unexpectedly passed away...she was 32 years old. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach. All I could say over and over again was "Wow." I was stunned, shocked & my heart hurt. We weren't "best friends" however she and her husband are people that Kath & I went to church with, who we were privileged to do life with. In fact, her husband is the one who designed the logo for "What Will Your Influence Be...?"

After my meeting was over I had a text message with all of her husbands contact information. My Sweet Girl encouraged me to text him however my Spirit encouraged me to call him. The moment I heard his voice tears began to well up in my eyes. As I began to speak my voice cracked. I, the one who was calling to offer encouragement, instantly became aware of my complete inadequacy. What do you say to a man whose wife just passed away? How do you say anything that will somehow make any of it better? What do I have to offer to anyone at a moment like this? The reality is there are no words, I am completely inadequate. I simply told him I am sorry, I love him and told him I would do absolutely anything I can for him.

The nagging ache in my heart would not go away...still hasn't. I tried to type him a message 7 or 8 times Monday night however I could find no words. Kath & I talked about faith & loss. I didn't want to be away from my wife & boys...I wanted to fly right back home, wrap them in my arms and just hold them. I woke up several times throughout the night on Monday and simply prayed for Bobby and his family. I have prayed for Bobby, their precious little girl and their entire family every day, several times a day. Bobby and I have exchanged several text messages. I am mindful of my struggles, of my inadequacy however I am also mindful that this is not about me. While I may not be much or worth much at this moment, I do care and I can be there.

I would like to pause for a moment and honor this wonderful woman, Crystal. Crystal was a very pretty young lady with a Spirit that simply shined...if you ever met a person like her you know exactly what I am talking about. Crystal would see you, smile, begin talking to you and suddenly you were smiling without even knowing why. She was so vibrant, so alive and she genuinely loved and cared about everyone that crossed her path. Crystal was a Christian, she loved the Lord, she loved her husband, she loved her precious baby girl and she loved on everyone who was blessed to cross her path. It is so absolutely perfect that she is honored with the phrase, "Shine Bright." This is exactly what she did, every day. The world would be a little dimmer today with her passing except for the fact that a little piece of her bright light shines in each person she selflessly poured herself into. Today she walks on streets of gold, another beautiful angel that has successfully completed her earthly journey and now lives in Heaven for eternity. 

There are several thoughts I want to share with you:
1. Shortly after speaking with Bobby on Monday, Payton called me. I told him about Crystal, we talked about she & Bobby, what special people they are, how horrible we felt, etc. I then told him about my phone call to Bobby, how I felt so inadequate. God then spoke to Payton through me as I said, "Please remember son, it is not about you. It is about the person that is hurting. It doesn't matter to Bobby what I said, it simply matters that I called." I hope my son learns this lesson, that he will be there for others, regardless of how he feels.

2. Guess what? Sometimes we are completely inadequate and that is o.k. I think sometimes we get so caught up in having to have the right answers, being able to say the right things, etc., that when we don't have them we do nothing. Well sometimes there are no right answers or words to say. Sometimes we don't understand things, they hurt, etc. Regardless, we can always care and we can always be there. Let us not miss the opportunity to keep it real and be there for others!

3. I am not going to lie...I don't understand this at all. I don't understand why a 32-year old woman is suddenly called Home. It makes no sense to me at all and my heart breaks for Bobby and their baby girl. I do know this though, I believe to the depths of my soul that God is in control and that He will lead, guide & comfort us though all seems so very dark at the moment. In so many ways this is the epitome of faith...being completely blind/unsure however trusting fully in God.

4. I want to ask you a favor - please love on those you are privileged to do life with and let them know how much you value & appreciate them. In one of his texts to me Bobby said, "I was thinking about influence yesterday and I realized just how many peoples lives that Crystal had an effect on. I was blown away." How come we wait until someone is gone before we communicate how much they mean to us? What would this world look like if we would pause, just for a moment, and let another person know how much we appreciate them, the things they say & do? We are all busy, we are all striving...for something. Let's encourage one another on a daily basis. We don't hesitate to tell someone when we think they have done something wrong or offended us. What if we flipped the whole equation? What if we were quicker with the praise and slower with the criticism? I am pretty sure our world would look a whole lot different.

5. Finally, I would like to respectfully ask you to say a prayer for Bobby, their daughter and their family. It doesn't matter if you don't know them, God does. Thank you.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev