Why Do You Do What You Do?

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope & trust this post finds you having a great day as the beautiful new day dawns! 

This morning I want to pour out my heart for a little but and then share a thought with you.

What are my beliefs, the convictions of my heart & Spirit, that drive my actions every day? There are reasons why we do the things we do, or don't do some things. Each one of us, if we could strip away the layers, has a reason, a why, for our actions & words. This morning I am going to put some of mine out there.

1. I believe that every person's life has value & meaning, that there is a purpose for them to fulfill on their life journey. Some need help finding their purpose. Some need encouragement to rise up again and pursue their purpose. Whatever their story, the hurts, struggles or pain, they are valuable, their life matters and their is a purpose within their heart that they are called to fulfill. This drives me...

2. I also know that life is tough. People do mean things. Hearts, Spirits, minds & bodies get broken. What then? Who is going to lift up & encourage? Who is going to be the one others can lean on, so they can catch their breath for a moment? Who is going to be the one to remind us of who we really are? God gave me the heart of an encourager...to look past the faults, failures & difficulties and to see the potential. This drives me...

3. I know, from life experience & Godly wisdom, that the things we fill our hearts, minds & Spirits with dictate our thoughts, words & actions which in turn, dictate the quality of life we live. During a conversation with God as I drove to Tucson one day, complaining to Him about all the negativity that floods people's lives, I felt a conviction in my Spirit that said, "What Will Your Influence Be...?" I made a vow to God that every day, as long as I lived, I would do everything I could do to put positive, encouraging thoughts & ideas before people. While I can't make them read these things, I can't own what anyone else does, I can choose to intentionally put a positive word or thought out there every day. This drives me...

4. I know that feelings can be fickle things. I don't wake up every day feeling happy, feeling excited, feeling optimistic. There are many mornings when I walk to my chair where I sit and do my morning readings feeling lower than a snakes belly. I can be worried, stressed, fearful. I know I need God, His word, His perspective, His insight and I need Jesus. This drives me...

5. I figured out that God was continually putting me in positions of leadership, to have influence in the lives of others. I was also acutely aware that I often felt so inadequate to fulfill the roles He was blessing me with. One night, when my Beautiful Bride, Kathy, and I were on vacation, I was talking to God. At the time I told God, "I don't know if I am supposed to be a Coach or not. I do know that You continually place me in positions of leadership. From this day forth I promise you Lord, I will study leadership. I will read. I will learn as much as I can to develop as a leader." This drives me...

6. God has also given me a heart for men, husband & fathers. It started in a little boy who just wanted his Dad to love him. To play catch with him. To be proud of him. This heart continued to grow in a boy, without anyone to show him what a real man looked like, who tried to figure it out on his own and did a ton of really stupid things in this quest. It soared in a young man, who looked into the precious eyes of his first born son, feeling the enormity of the responsibility of this precious gift who was now fully dependent on me. This drives me...

So what drives you Friends? What is the reason why you do what you do? Have you ever stopped and thought about it? If not, I would really encourage you to do so. Chances are pretty good that you will finds some things that you thoughtlessly do out of habit. I want to push back against you a little bit on that. Why? Because quite simply Friend, your life is far too valuable to live that way. 

I also want to share a thought with you. I almost talked about this last week, perhaps I did touch on it a little. It then flashed before me again this week and I knew I just had to share this thought/perspective with you.

I don't know about you but for a large portion of my life I thought that the really good relationships I had with people were the one's were there was no problems, no conflicts. Perhaps it was because of how problems & conflicts were handled when I was a boy...I just wanted to be good enough. I didn't want to cause problems, issues, etc. However I have learned that this is a very flawed belief. The most valuable, meaningful relationships I have are with people who I have been through some stuff with. Every day wasn't great however every day we committed to doing life together. Sometimes we got mad at each other. Sometimes we laughed. Sometimes we cried. Sometimes we yelled. And sometimes, for a short period of time, we wouldn't even talk to each other. 

Life isn't easy for anyone and when you have any two people trying to do life together, it can get downright messy. And this morning I want to tell you, that's a good thing! Get down in the mess, climb around in the mud, snot bubbles and all! A real key in all this is that we fight for our relationships - which means we are willing to have the tough conversations, that we are willing to do & say things that might not be most comfortable for us, individually - and not against each other. When you have a real friend, you don't have to be perfect, you don't have to have all the answers and you don't have to be something you are not. My family is not perfect. We have lots of scars, we have climbed through a lot of mud and there have been more than our fair share of tears. I love each one of them with all my heart and there is nothing I would not do for them.

So here is a perspective shift for you. The next time things start to get a little messy, don't pull back, assuming that the relationship is broken...perhaps it's really just getting ready to grow.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev