Hope

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope & trust this post finds you all having had a great day and week! It's a beautiful, warm, muggy evening on the Texas Gulf Coast!

This week I want to share a few thoughts with you.

First...

Last week I attended a leadership training seminar. One component of the seminar was looking at 10's of possible values, values that each of us as individuals hold dear, and narrowing it down to our top 5. We each then laid our cards on the table - literally! - showing what we had selected as our top values. We then walked around the room looking at what one another had selected as our values. When we were done, one of my classmates said, "I want to ask Kevin a question." She then said, "You are the only one who listed 'hope' as one of your values. Will you explain why 'hope' is a value to you?" 

Man I thought a lot about that this week. I kept thinking about an article I had read that talked about the enormous loss of American POW's during the Korean War utilizing only one tactic - removing hope. I found an excellent article that explains it. Please, take a few minutes to read it.

The Prison of Hopelessness

By Chaplain (Capt.) Tim Wilson, 302nd Airlift Wing / Published August 23, 2006

PETERSON AIR FORCE BASE, Colo. (AFRC) -- The Korean War introduced an insidious new strain on prisoners of war. The death rate in the North Korean POW camps was an incredible 38 percent - the highest in U.S. military history. What makes this statistic so hard to fathom is that on the whole POW's were provided with adequate food, water and shelter and for the most part were not subjected to physical torture so prevalent in previous wars. 

The extent of the problem was realized when it was discovered that the POW camps were often not surrounded by barbed wire or armed guards yet no one tried to escape. When arriving in Japan after release the Red Cross gave newly freed prisoners the opportunity to call home. Very few bothered. There was a marked lack of camaraderie among those released; few seemed to have built friendships. But what shocked the military the most were reports that it was not unusual for a soldier to wander into his hut, go into a corner alone, sit down, pull a blanket over his head and within days he would be dead. 

What was so devastating to highly trained, combat harden soldiers. A study of 1,000 POWs was commissioned. Dr. William E. Mayer the lead psychiatrist uncovered a new malady in the hearts of Korean War prisoners of war - a syndrome of pervasive and extreme hopelessness. Mayer's defined it as "mirasmus" or a "lack of resistance, and acute passivity." Soldiers called it the plain old "give up-itis." How could hope be eradicated so completely for the souls of soldiers? 

Four techniques were used to bring a person to the place where they despair of life. First, informing on others was encouraged. The North Koreans gave prisoners small rewards like cigarettes or sweets when they snitched on each other. The amazing thing was that neither the offender nor the reporting soldier was punished - the real intent was to shatter trust between comrades in arms. 

Secondly, extreme self criticism was promoted. The captors formed small groups in which soldiers "confessed" not only all the bad things they had done but also all the good things they could have done but failed to do. This "confessing" was not for the sake of the North Koreans but to erode self respect and personal worth among the American soldiers. 

The third major tactic was to break down loyalty to others, especially to leadership and our country. It was intended to destroy a spirit of teamwork and cooperation and replace it with isolation and excessive self interest. In one case, it was reported that 40 men stood by as three of their extremely ill fellow soldiers were thrown out the hut by a disgruntled fellow prisoner and left in the element to perish. When asked why they did nothing, they replied, "Because it wasn't their job." 

The last devastating scheme was to withhold all positive emotional support while inundating soldiers with negative emotions. If a soldier received a supportive letter from home, the captors withheld it, however, any bad news - the death of a relative, or in one case a wife's Dear John letter were delivered immediately. This constant demoralization manufactured an overwhelming sense of disappointment with loved ones, their country and even their faith. 

How can the specter of hopelessness be overcome while living in the shadow of despair? The apostle Paul wrote a letter to a church in dangerously close to functional collapse. They were self centered, sectarian and just down right mean to one other. It was a group rapidly moving from productivity to pandemonium. In the middle of this chaos, Saint Paul focuses on three essentials. He insightfully pens "There are three things that remain-faith, hope, and love... " (1 Corinthians 13:13) Three fundamentals: faith, a stead confidence in an all powerful God who comes through in tough times, hope, an unswerving mental commitment that the best is yet to come regardless of my present circumstances and love, an extravagant loyalty to the well being of those around me- my family, my friends and fellow workers. Don't voluntarily become confined to the sinister prison of hopelessness and isolation, reach out in "faith, hope and love" and the jail door of dark despair will open wide letting the warm sun of new found assurance warm your heart. 

It is so fascinating to me...they literally died from a loss of hope. As I have thought about you and me this week, I think there are really 2 categories of us, with one sub-category.

1. There are those of us who put our hope in God.

1a. There are those of us who put our hope in things of this world.

2. Those who have no hope.

Those in the 1st categories have hope...so we have a fighting chance. One has a hope in something that fails & disappoints...the other is a hope in One who has already overcome the world and has kept every promise since the beginning of, well, everything since He created everything!

Those in the 2nd category, those without hope, are dying. They might be walking around living a life however, sadly, they are not alive.

I pray Friends that we will fight for hope every day of our lives.

Second...

Here's another one for you to ponder that I recently heard; would people know that you have been talking to Jesus by the way you speak & act? I am sorry, I don't know who said it however I found it very profound, very convicting. 

I will take it one step further; who will people know that you have been talking to, spending time with by the way you speak & act? See Friends, it is impossible to get up close and personal with people and not be influenced in our behavior by them. This is a profound question you and I need to answer every day.

And Finally...

I had a profound moment with my middle Tender Warrior, Gehrig, last weekend. He, Landry & I had gone to a sporting goods store to buy some fishing gear for our fishing trip the next day. As Gehrig was driving us home, country music blaring, we are in the middle lane and cars are just flyin' by us on each side. I look over at the speedometer and Gehrig is going slower than the posted speed limit...and he could care less! I immediately think to how I drive - as fast as I can get away with, looking for the "fast lane," always in a hurry to get wherever I am going. And in that moment, I had a deep respect and admiration for G. He wasn't in a hurry, he could care less about which lane was the "fast lane"...he was just enjoying the time with his Dad, brother and some country music. I also realized in that moment that I have a lot to learn from him.

I pray that we will all have eyes - literal and those of the heart - to see things a little differently. That we would value & appreciate the differences that we all have. That we would be willing to learn something from everyone we are privileged to do life with, every day. Now I gotta hurry and get goin cause G is coming home from fishing soon and I gotta go get ready to study him! :)

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev