Are We Receivable?

Happy Friday, Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new opportunity begins to dawn in my Sweet Home Alabama! :)

My Beautiful Bride, Kathy, leads a women's group at church. It is something God had really burdened her heart to do and, despite her own fears and doubts, she chose to be obedient to this call. Not surprisingly, God has brought together such a wonderful collection of beautiful souls that love and encourage one another. It has been awesome and awe-inspiring to watch!

After their meeting this week she went out to lunch with a couple of the ladies from her group. One of them decided to share her story with Kath. This beautiful woman with a priceless soul has endured a lot. One of the outcomes of the many hardships she has faced, many created by "Christians", she had walked away from the church. She has only recently started going back to church and when she heard about this group, she wasn't sure she wanted to participate. She didn't know if this group would be like other "Christians" she had encountered...would they shame? Would they judge? Would they hold up their (pretend) perfect lives and use them as a weapon against her? So you know what she did? She did research. She jumped on Facebook and looked at Kath and other women that are in the group. She read their posts and looked at their pictures. All in an effort to see if she thought they were loving and kind...or something else.

I have thought about that conversation several times. What message are we sending to people with the lives we live? Are we so busy trying to cover our brokenness that we lose the ability to connect with people just like us, the broken? Are we so busy trying to portray that we have it all together that we fail to let others know that we are doing the very best we can to hold it all together, just like them? That is definitely not the life I want to live...and I don't believe that this is the life God has called any of us to live. While perhaps cliches, I do believe these two statements are true:

1. Our messes become our messages.

2. Our tests become our testimonies.

But only if we keep it real. If we drop the masks, stop the facades, and genuinely do life with people. But that can only happen if we are receivable.

I have referenced the book, Love Kindness; Discover the Power of a Forgotten Christian Virtue, by Barry H. Corey many times. This is one of the best, most thought provoking, books I have ever read. I would highly recommend it! In Chapter 1 - it is not a mistake that it is the first chapter...it was very well thought out! :) - Barry talks about first and foremost being receivable. I want to share several excerpts with you. And it should be noted, Dads, that most of what Barry references is what he saw his Dad live out every day...not just what he talked about!

"...a receivable life. Love your enemies. Receive a child in Jesus' name. Pray for those who persecute you. When you're slapped on the cheek, turn the other. Listen to the the shunned harlot. Talk to the scorned tax collector. When someone takes your coat, give him your shirt. When someone tells you she wants you to walk a mile with her, walk two."

"Knowing I was the student that moment as we turned onto the next street, I waited for my father to continue. He told me that in everything he did, he would choose to make himself receivable to the people God placed in his life.

He actually used the word receivable. This was the word that made him tick. I don't know if I've heard other followers of Jesus refer to themselves that way, but the word works for me. My father gave me the vocabulary to articulate his way of life and to help me understand it in mine.

He stopped walking and turned to me. "Barry," he said, "if the lives God intersects with mine don't have the opportunity to receive me, how will they know the love God has for them?" I nodded."

"I've got to live my life so strangers, friends, aching, lonely, family - they receive me," he said. "And through me they see God's inexhaustible love."

"Over the years I've been quick to relegate the way of kindness to someone who is simpler, who is less of a leader than I am. I am quick to conclude that some people have the knack for kindness, but it's not my thing. I'm too busy, too proud, too shy, too apathetic, too fearful, too macho, too passive, too oblivious. When I do this, I'm missing the point that for followers of Jesus, it's not an option but a mandate, not an occasion but a lifestyle. This has been my struggle for the better part of my life.

We're okay with occasional acts of kindness, but a life of kindness? That's for those less burdened by the strains of responsibility and who have a lot more margin to pencil kindness moments into their schedules. Kindness is too soft for leaders.

But the Bible never talks about kindness as a gift you either have or you don't. It describes kindness as a fruit of the Spirit, a virtue that is meant to grow from all Christians, even when other people don't like the kindness they see in us. 

This may sound counterintuitive, but the objective of the receivable life is not to be received, but to be receivable. The goal of the kind life is not to be thanked; it is to be obedient. Whether or not the grocery clerk or the college professor receives my overtures of kindness should not be my concern. Jesus never said we would be received. He simply said we need to make ourselves receivable - that is, to remove the distance or obstacles that keep others from seeing Jesus within us. In fact, Jesus said that sometimes, despite our lives of grace, we will not be received. We can expect, then, to be ignored, rejected, or ever persecuted. He even assures us of solidarity with him when we are snubbed, affirming in the Gospel of Luke that "whoever rejects you rejects me; but whoever rejects me rejects him who sent me" (10:16).

I sometimes confuse living to be received and living to be receivable. Living to be received focuses on how others respond to my kindness. This is out of my control. Not only that, but living to be received ultimately inflates my ego. Living to be receivable is different. It decreases the ego because it's kindness that is not waiting for a thank-you. Living the way of kindness should not be measured by how people perceive me. Living the way of kindness calls us to a posture of humility, and humility is most authentically lived when I accept that my kindness will sometimes be rejected. Kindness focuses on how I open myself for others to receive me, whether they choose to or not."

"Those who live the receivable life make it easy for some to love them. They also make it easy for some to despise them. But they don't make it easy for anyone to forget them. Kindness always stands out."

"The way of kindness is not just having the right theology; it's being the right kind of people. It's understanding that our lives as Jesus' followers mean we have a common humanity with everyone, and therefore there's no need for exceptionalism. We owe all human beings the honor due them as beings made in the image of God."

Let's not strive to be perfect, to hide all our faults and flaws. No, let's strive tirelessly to be receivable. To let others know that they are not alone and, most importantly, let's let them know of the love, mercy, and grace that God has for them.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, please cherish your precious families, and please stay well! :)

Kev