Christmas Reflections & Lessons

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you having a great day and that you had a wonderful Christmas week with your family.

I want to share a few reflections and some lessons learned from this Christmas.

1. This year I went back to scheduling a special night with each of my 3 Tender Warriors. They picked the date & time - it immediately went on my calendar, they picked the place we would go for dinner and then we did whatever they wanted to do. Before we went I made it very clear to them that they did not have to buy anything...we could just walk around the mall or whatever together.

The first night was Gehrig. He is definitely my son...it was all about the dinner. We went to his favorite restaurant, ordered bacon double cheeseburgers, fries, and he got a strawberry shake. After dinner we went to walk around the mall. He was fine with not buying anyone a gift...except Mom. He knew exactly what he wanted to get her, where it would be, and he got it for her. It truly touched my heart to see my son be so thoughtful.

The second night was a swap - it was supposed to be with Payton however he talked Landry into changing dates with him. Landry chose to go to Red Lobster...yes!! We shared our clam chowder, we shared calamari and then we shared grilled shrimp. After eating we headed over to the mall and walked around. After the first store I had to remind him that the idea was not what we wanted but what we could give to others. Hey, he's 8...I am 46 and I get it! :) We went to a jewelry store and slowly started walking around the different cases. His eyes locked in on a necklace that said "Love." He asked the woman working if he could see it...he was afraid to touch it. I asked her the price and he had enough...but would have very little left. We decided to walk around and think about such a big purchase. As we made it to the far end of the mall he looked at me and said, "I am going to buy it for Mom." We hustled back to the store and my 8-year old Little Tender Warrior bought his Mom a very beautiful necklace. I was amazed by the thought he really put into...and the fact that he was willing to sacrifice nearly everything he had for his Mom.

The final night was Payton and I. We did some serious damage to some wings...and cheese sticks...and fried zucchini...and onion rings...and - well you get the point! We then headed over to the mall. He knew for a fact he wanted to get something for two people - his baby brother and his Mom. We went to Build-A-Bear and he had a bear built for Landry - it was a white bear because it would look much better with the Marine uniform he bought for it. This bear would be a special blessing a couple of days later. And he knew he wanted to buy his Mom a ring she had seen while they were together...at another mall...20 miles away! So after getting our bear - his name is PAL...for Payton And Landry - we hopped in the car and headed to the other mall. Just as with Gehrig he knew right where we were going, what he wanted and he got it. Wow, I guess it isn't true that all teenagers think about is themselves.

You know what? These three nights were the greatest gift...to me! To have time with each of my sons, to talk about life, about what is important to them, to do what they want...Friends, it was priceless. These boys are such a great gift and they bless my life so richly! We all ignored cell phones and we just enjoyed each other. We had deep conversations - hopes, dreams, fears - and we laughed. It wasn't about where we were going or what we were buying. No, it was about being together, truly enjoying one another and cherishing our time together. This is a tradition that will continue as long as the boys are willing to go with me.

2. So on Christmas Eve, around 2:00 p.m., my Littlest Tender Warrior, the one who is most excited about Christmas, gets the flu. He is sicker than anything. He would continue to get sick about every 30 minutes late into the night. He is such a trooper. He tries to get excited, participates in opening his Dad Box - special gifts I have gotten for him - and then he gets sick again. No matter where he is, what he is doing, every thirty minutes he gets sick and PAL is with him constantly. He loves on and hugs that bear all day, all night...and it still continues. The only time he moves away from PAL is when he knows he is about to be sick.

Payton tried hard to get Landry to write a note to Santa...Little Man just couldn't do it. So Payton wrote the note for him. The note touched my heart. It was a very passionate note expressing concern for his brother, asking Santa to use some magical power to make Landry feel better and asking Santa to answer all of the normal questions that Landry would ask - how is Rudolph? How is Mrs. Claus? The love and concern, the fact that he just wanted his little brother to get well truly touched my heart.

As for Landry, he woke up on Christmas morning feeling great. He was back to his normal self - running around everywhere, wonder and excitement at every turn. The thing most incredible to me - he stated that this had been a great Christmas. He didn't mention being so sick, he didn't whine or complain about anything...he simply announced that this had been a great Christmas. The circumstances didn't define the day...he did, on his terms, with his family, the way he wanted to define it. His Dad learned another great lesson by the example he set for me.

3. On Christmas night the Haslam family started what I think will be a new tradition - we watched movies on the Hallmark Channel. It started off with Landry, my Beautiful Bride and I. Somewhere around the end of the first movie and the beginning of the second Gehrig joined us. Then, towards the end of the second movie Payton came in. All told we watched 4 movies, back to back to back to back. It was awesome!

The thing I keep coming back to is how in each movie, in the end, someone gets their life back on track by being who they are, by pursuing what is important to them, by not allowing this world to define them. Sounds a lot like life, huh? It is life...for you, for me, for all of us. The key, in all of this is to pursue our own individual greatness, to become the best we are capable of becoming, to pursue our dreams. It is when we get caught up in other stuff that life gets sideways - whether it is real or a Hallmark movie. The reward for pursuing our own greatness is not necessarily wealth or fame, it is much more valuable than that! The reward is a peace, a deep abiding peace that can only be found in the complete pursuit of our own individual greatness. This is my hope, my prayer for each one of us.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great evening, a wonderful rest of the weekend, a very Happy New Year and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

Hope or Fear

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that you have all had a great week. Only 5 days until Christmas...oh my!

Hope or fear...we are all going to choose one or the other, possibly multiple times, during the day as well as throughout our lives. The choice we make in those moments will determine the quality of the lives we live, the actions we take and, as a result of the actions we do or do not take, dictate the futures we live.

Have you ever really thought about hope, about fear. We hope for things we want to happen, we fear things that we don't want to happen. It is in the uncertainty of life that the seeds of hope or fear are planted - whichever one we water is the one that grows. You want to really shake your head? Take a look at this:

Certain
Adjective
Known for sure, established beyond doubt

So what exactly can we be certain of? I started typing out a whole bunch of questions - each one had "no" for an answer - however I don't want to waste your time or belabor the point. I would argue that the only thing that is certain is this moment - who you are, where you are, your hopes & dreams, etc. - right now. The only thing you or I can do is to live fully in this moment right now. While I hope I have tomorrow with my family I don't know that I will. Therefore wisdom would tell me to live this moment to the fullest with them - to truly be fully present with them, to love them, to cherish our time together. It is true of literally every aspect of life, of every moment. The challenge then is to live fully in the moment.

Let's get back to hope and fear and their impact on the moment. I can live a life of hope - noun; a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen - or I can live a life of fear - noun; an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat. Both are based on the unknown - something in the future. In fact, each one of us will choose to live with one or the other - they may be in different shades of grey as a friend of mine would say, but the scale is tipped towards one or the other. And the impact on the moment? Think about the words we speak, the things we do, how we treat others when we have an expectation or a desire for something to happen. How about the words we speak, the things we do, how we treat others when we have a belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat? Our choice to walk by or hope to walk by faith has everything to do with the moment - they control it.

Friends, I pray that each one of us will choose to live a life of hope. Will we get knocked down sometimes, kicked in the gut? Yes, I am sorry we will. What do we do then? We get back up, we dust ourselves off and we again make a choice - hope or fear. Please choose hope.

Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, a very Merry Christmas and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

Gentle Reminders

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day on this beautiful Friday and that you have had a great week!

This week I would like to share two, what I would call, gentle reminders.

Earlier this week I was reading my Bible and two different times the word "patience" was listed. The word stood out to me like it was highlighted...more specifically, like it was meant for me. I kept reading and my eyes kept getting drawn back to these words - patience. I decided to look up the meaning of the word instead of just assuming I knew what it meant. If you Google the word "patience" here is what you will find:

pa·tience

 

noun

noun: patience

1. 1.

   the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.

 

Let's see...the capacity to accept (hard sometimes) or tolerate (sounds more like me!) delay (augh!), trouble (feel uncomfortable), or suffering (really don't want to!) without getting angry (clear throat) or upset (throw up arms in despair!). How can an 8 letter little word pack so much power?!?!

Try the beginning of this scripture out that has been bouncing around in my head all week; "Love is patient..." So, love is the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset. Now that is powerful! Man I want to be patient with my Beautiful Bride, my Tender Warriors, with every person whose life I cross paths with every day. It is a task requiring strength far greater than I can ever muster in my own strength, courage, knowledge and/or wisdom. I will need to meet Him again tomorrow morning if there is the smallest of chance.

I have been rereading some of my leadership books each morning. Earlier this week I cracked open Wooden on Leadership by John Wooden and Steve Jamison. There were a few things that I read this week that were like water to my mouth when it is parched & dry. It was so refreshing! I was like, "how did I forget this?!" In the hustle of life, in the constant striving and fighting for whatever we are fighting for, it is sometimes easy to lose sight of some simple and yet incredibly profound thoughts. Let me share a few quick excerpts here with you:

• ...most of us have a potential far beyond what we think possible.
• Through it all he [Coach Wooden's Dad] made the best of what he had and was thankful for it.
• "Sons," he [Dad] would tell my three brothers and me, "don't worry about whether you're better than somebody else, but never cease trying to be the best you can become. You have control over that; the other you don't."
• Many cynics, then and now, dismiss what Dad taught me about success as being naïve or impractical. But I have yet to hear the cynics or skeptics describe what more you can give beyond your best. To my way of thinking, when you give your total effort - everything you have - the score can never make you a loser. And when you do less, it can't somehow magically turn you into a winner.
• Regardless of the situation you face as a leader, you must believe and teach those under your leadership that success is theirs when together you summon the will to put forth everything you have.

This morning I was all fired up about some of the things I read in Coach Wooden's book so I decided to use quotes from him for my Facebook and Twitter posts today. I want to share one with you that I would like to offer as our challenge this week:

"I am just a common man who is true to his beliefs." - John Wooden

 

Most would not refer to Coach Wooden as "common." The term used to describe him would be "exceptional" or whatever is greater than "exceptional." And yet, Coach saw himself as a common man - and here is the nugget - who was simply true to his beliefs. The challenge to me, to you, is this - can we say the same thing? Can we truly stand tall and publicly state "I am true to my beliefs." I honestly can't think of a much greater epitaph.

 

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

 

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

 

Kev

Honor Today

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having had a great day and a wonderful weekend! Additionally, I hope you have got your battery recharged and that you are ready for a great, difference making week.

Earlier this week I was speaking with a great friend...you know, the kind that calls you at just the right time without even knowing it is the right time. We had a great conversation and he said something that struck me as incredibly profound: "honor today." I have thought, I continue to think, about that comment.

• You want a closer relationship with God? Honor today.
• You want to become all that you were created to become? Honor today.
• You want to be one with your spouse? Honor today.
• You want to serve your family, to have a close relationship with them? Honor today.
• You want to fulfill your goals & dreams? Honor today.
• You want to live with joy & peace in your spirit? Honor today.
• You want to live free of regret, fear, worry? Honor today.
• You want to break free from an addiction, a bad relationship, a bad circumstance? Honor today.

Honor today...incredibly simple, incredibly profound. If, IF we truly lived by the simple motto of "Honor today" how different would our tomorrows be? How different would our lives - our marriages, our relationships with our children, our careers be if we simply honored today? It makes sense to me. If I focus on today - pursue God, lead & serve my wife & sons, if I do the very best I can in everything I do today all my tomorrows will take care of themselves. Today I am making this commitment. When the alarm goes off in the morning I will have to make it again. This process will have to repeat itself each and every day if I am truly to "Honor today."

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great evening, an awesome week, please cherish your precious families and please, honor today.

Kev

A Boys Sermon

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you having a great day on this beautiful Friday morning! 

One of my sons has been preaching a sermon through the life he is living. The lessons keep coming at me. I am proud, shocked, amazed, awed...all at once! For some context, prior to sharing his sermon, I want to share three paragraphs from the "Happy Friday" I wrote on November 11, 2011 titled "A Father's Love."

One of my sons has struggled lately with honesty - complete truth without deception. As my Beautiful Bride and I have found times of his dishonesty we have addressed it...first by talking, demonstrating grace, then taking away privileges...and yet, sadly, there was another instance of dishonesty. I was shocked, disappointed, angry, confused - how could this be? We had talked about honesty, how honesty is the foundation of every relationship, how his continued acts of dishonesty were harming our relationship, how it would be difficult to ever trust him if I didn't know he was ALWAYS (that is measurable by the way!) telling me the truth, etc.

Not knowing exactly what to do - and definitely not trusting MY initial thoughts & feelings...the song "Lead Me" by Sanctus Real comes to mind! - I prayed. I asked God to give me His knowledge and His wisdom to lead my son through me, to see the greatness that God sees in him and to do what God would have me do to empower my son to become all that God has created him to become. The answer came almost immediately...though all of the lessons of the action would be revealed slowly. My boys love sports - go figure! - and for a couple of months this son had been looking forward to the start of basketball season...the first time he would be able to try-out and play on a school team. This is a privilege that would now be taken away...there were much more important things to work on than basketball.

As I sat down with my son and began talking to him, he acknowledged his dishonesty, he stated that he knew he shouldn't have done it - though he knew in his heart it was wrong...this is a great sign! - and yet he did. We again talked about all the consequences of dishonesty and then I told him what the consequence of his actions would be. His eyes immediately filled with tears and a look of complete brokenness crossed his face...at that exact moment my heart broke for my son. Almost immediately I wanted to take it back. I silently asked the Lord if He was sure. Couldn't we do something else? Does it have to be this way? And then I recognized the peace in my Spirit that only comes from the affirmation of God. No, we couldn't do something else. Yes, it has to be this way. I am teaching my son a lesson and I am the one learning...I clear heard and felt God say, "Trust me."

I will NEVER forget that night, that conversation.

We grew together during that season of life, and that basketball season. Last year, as a 7th grader, he went out for the basketball team...and got cut, he didn't make it. I will never forget that day either, the moment he realized he had not made the team. Again, God led us through that time, through those seasons.

About two months ago Gehrig and I were talking. I asked him if he was going to try out for the team. He said no, that - according to him - many of the boys play club basketball, that their club basketball coach is the 8th grade coach and that he would not make the team. We talked about pursuing our goals & dreams, that God is in control of all situations and that we should not close the door on possibilities, that we shouldn't put God in a box. G didn't say much. I thought back to that night in 2011...

Over the past couple of months I would come home from work and G would be out front shooting baskets. Nothing unusual about that, all of my boys love to play all the time. I come home another day and he is up at the park shooting baskets. Again, nothing unusual. Then, about 3 weeks ago, my Beautiful Bride tells me "G is trying out for the basketball team." What?!?! She is unaware of the conversation he and I had. I share it with her. That night I ask Gehrig is he is trying out for the team. He says yes with a quite confidence. It is clear he has had a lot of conversations that did not include me, that he has decided to go for it and his spirit is at peace. Wow!

Last week I took G to tryouts every morning at 5:35. My bride and I prayed. Last Sunday I was driving to church thinking about all of this and I thought, "if he makes the team this will be 'Happy Friday.'" My spirit immediately convicted me; the lesson had already been taught, the "Happy Friday" had already been written. Regardless of whether or not he made the team this would be "Happy Friday." A boy had faced his fears & doubts, a boy had prepared, a boy had decided to pursue his goals & dreams, a boy was trusting God...A Dad was watching and learning, hoping & praying that he would be as strong as the boy, that he would pursue his goals & dreams with the quite certainty of the boy. Yes, regardless this was "Happy Friday."

The final practice of tryouts was Monday morning. The boys would find out who had made the team after school. As I drove G to practice that morning I asked him if he wanted me to pick him up after school, to be there when he found out. He said "sure." I wanted to be there for my boy - good news or bad - and yet it had the feeling that he was the one that was going to be there for me. 

I got to the school a little before 3. It took him FOREVER to get to the car. I prayed, I texted my Bride and I waited. He got to the car about 3 minutes after 3:00 - 3 minutes was my forever. He made the team. It strikes me as profound; he remained quietly confident. I am whooping and hollering, giving him high fives, all excited and he is...calm. It is clear, good or bad, he had resolved the matter in his mind weeks ago. He was going to do his best, pursue his goals & dreams and trust God. He walked it out.

That's it, that's the sermon. Now it is up to you and I. Will we resolve the matter in our minds? Will we do our best, pursue our goals & dreams and trust God? It's possible, I have personally witnessed it. I have witnessed the quite peace and confidence that comes with it.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

A Different Perspective

Happy Friday Friends,

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and the you have had an awesome week! Typing this Happy Friday on my iPad...please give me grace with typos.

On Sunday (November 10th) there was a great article in the Arizona Republic written by Laurie Roberts titled "A beacon of light, faith and love." Laurie wrote about an incredible woman named Susan Castaneda. In the beginning of the article Laurie described Susan this way: "Susan is on of those people you run into now and then, the sort who seems lit from within, as if a beacon were put there to show the rest of us the way - especially those of us who didn't even realize we had veered off course." The article had my attention.

Susan had been diagnosed with Stage 4 ovarian cancer in 2009. This however was not a sad article, an article of regret, missed opportunities, etc. No, it was something much different. Here is how Susan explained it to Laurie: "I look around me and I can see that even the smallest things, I can thank God for," she told me. "I just look at everything that I have that is good. Cancer's one bad thing, but I have 101 good things." Wow...

I now want to get out of the way and just share an excerpt from the article, to let Laurie and Susan speak to you. Taken directly from the article:

Over the last year, she lived with pain, the nausea and the weakness. But there was also a newfound appreciation for the blessings that become more evident when they're about to be taken away.

Big things, like family and friends. Little things, like the ability to get up and go to work, or to help out the young mother ahead of you in the grocery-store checkout line - the one who is pulling items out of her cart because she can't afford them.

"I wake up every day with the reminder that it could be my last day," Susan explained. "I'm going to live my life to the fullest. I'm doing what I want to do now, and I don't hesitate to help anybody who crosses my path that needs a helping hand. And it's not because I think it's going to get me closer to heaven. It's to make me feel good about life."

And so come the lessons that Susan offered as we sat in that basement cafeteria on a scorcher of a blessed Arizona afternoon - lessons we all know but so easily forget in our headlong rush to hurtle through our God-given days.

Tell the people that you love that you love them, every day, she told me.

Give something of yourself to someone else, every day, whether it's from your wallet or from your heart.

And remember, every day, that it could be your last.

"I think at some point we all need to say, 'Let's stop and re-evaluate how we look at life," she said. "I don't wish a terminal diagnosis on anybody. I really don't. But what I do wish is that people can take a look at life through a terminally ill person's eyes, because I bet you they'll just have a different perspective on life."

How is your perspective after reading that Friends? Mine is definitely changed. My heart, my spirit is speaking - no, make that screaming - to me. However I wasn't done getting lessons from someone with a terminal illness this week.

As I was driving to work this week a woman called into the radio station. She too had been diagnosed with a terminal illness. Just like Susan she was incredibly happy, thankful - truly thankful - for each day she had been given. She said something I am pretty sure I will remember the rest of my life. Here is what she said:

"To many people you will cross paths with in life, you only live for one day. They will only know you from that one day your paths crossed. How will they remember your life?"

Pretty powerful stuff, huh? Tell them you love them every day, give something from your wallet or your heart every day, how will they remember your life? As Laurie said, "lessons we all know but so easily forget in our headlong rush to hurtle through our God-given days." You and I will choose today and then tomorrow and then tomorrow and then...

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

A Story

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that you have had a great week!

As I talked about in "Happy Friday" last week, last Friday night was my oldest sons Senior Night at his football game - the last regular season home football game. It was such a special night...truly, I don't know how it could have been more perfect. We were blessed with family, many friends...it was truly incredible.

One of the friends that came to the game is a Godly man who I was blessed that God placed in my life a few years ago. Because of priorities - and thankfully he has them in order! - he didn't get to arrive at the game until after halftime. You see, he had a commitment to his daughter which he had to honor first. Just the same, please don't miss this part, he still came to the game. He had to have known coming that the game would be in the 2nd half. It was a key high school match-up, the stands were packed which means the parking lot was packed as well. He still came. He took the time. He made the effort. It spoke to my heart.

As he came up I introduced him to all of our family and friends - telling him a little about each, explaining why they are so special to me. As the final seconds were ticking off the clock we hustled down to the field to hug my boy, to hug his teammates, to enjoy the moment. Again, the same process played itself out. I would see someone, explain who they are, share a little bit of their story and then go give them a hug.

At one point he looks at me and says, "who is that little boy with Payton?" I imagine he turned to look at me however I was already gone. You see the little boy is a very special autistic boy who my wife has the privilege of working with every day. He has written Payton notes, made his signs throughout the season. I had the privilege of meeting him a couple of weeks ago. When my wife said, "who is gonna win Friday night?" he got all excited, raised his arms like he was a champion athlete and said, "the Wildcats...whoop whoop!!!" Such a sweet, precious spirit. He had told Kath several times "I am going to the game this week." He wouldn't show up - however he would ALWAYS know the score! - and then he would say the same thing again. Here he was...finally. He was smiling all over himself - one of those smiles that just makes you want to smile. I grabbed my Beautiful Bride, told her he was here and we took pictures of him with Payton. He was excited, we were excited...it was truly special.

I went back to my buddy and he said, "where did you take off running?" I told him the story about this sweet boy. It was then, at that moment, that the thought hit me - everyone has a story. The thought, the idea has been in my mind all week - everyone has a story. This is what makes them special. This is what makes them unique. This is their gift. This is what makes you special. This is what makes you unique. This is your gift. We all have a story.

At the game that night was:

• Mom - I became a part of her story and she was the beginning of mine.
• My sister, brother-in-law & nephew - Countless stories, like any brother and sister would have.
• Another Brother, a man who has walked beside me through more than one trial/tribulation, who has seen my heart laid bare...and loves me anyways, his beautiful wife and their incredible son.
• There was the couple and their two young boys. She was the realtor who sold us our home when we moved back to Arizona 7 years ago. Kath watched the boys for 3 years. Stories...
• One of my former players showed up. I recruited him as a 17-year old kid - just like my boy is now - and played a small part in helping grow into a man. He is now in his late twenties, expecting his first child.
• There was Grandma & Grandpa - Kath's parents. They knew my when I was a 17-year old kid making mistakes 17-year old kids make and they have loved and supported me.
• There was Kath's sister, her daughter and her daughter's friend. More stories...some remembered, some being created this very night.
• Kath - The greatest gift God has ever given me on this earth. Knows my greatest hopes & dreams as well as my greatest worries & fears. She started dating a 17-year old, completely immature, clueless kid and has stood beside me as God has worked to mold, make & shape me into the man, husband, father that He plans for me to become. We are not there yet, still working on it, however she - my Sweet Girl - she has always stood by my side.
• My boss, her assistant and her friend. Really touched my heart...know clue they were coming. Another story created...

You see, we all have a story. We didn't talk about job titles, money people make or any of the other artificial standards that society wants us to believe are so important. No, it was about people, the roads we have walked together. And please notice, it really struck me as I was typing this, it wasn't about all the successes, victories, etc. In fact, the part that turns my heart most strongly to many - most? perhaps all - of the people is that they have loved me, cared about me, when I have given them reason not to and they have allowed me to love them back during their trials, their struggles.

This week I was listening to the radio and a singer was a guest - sorry, I didn't catch the name. The announcer asked him what his wish would be very Christmas. He stated, "That every person would know that their story matters. That their life is their gift." So beautiful, so true. That is my wish for you Friend, that you would realize - truly recognize, appreciate and believe - that your story matters and your life is a gift.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

The Moment

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day on this absolutely beautiful Friday morning! It has been a while since I have seen this early of a Friday morning. Because it has been more convenient for me, because it works best with the crazy Haslam family life, I have been writing "Happy Friday" on Thursday nights. I decided earlier this week that I was going to get up a little earlier this Friday morning and actually write "Happy Friday" on Friday morning like I always used to do. I almost regretted it when I woke up!! :)

I have a few different things on my heart this morning. Just going to share and see where it leads us.

Senior Night
Tonight at 6:30 p.m. my Beautiful Bride and I will stand side by side, we will most likely hold hands and #5 - our 17-year old son - will line up across the field from us. The three of us will be introduced, a message that we have for him will be read as well as the message that he has for his Mom and I. We will walk towards each other, hug and I will have one more chance to tell him how much I love him and believe in him before he plays his final regular season home football game.

As I look to tonight my heart is not filled with sadness...the thing that keeps coming to mind is "This is so awesome!" Kath and I have often talked about this; I truly don't have a single "I wish Payton was..." moment/thought. I truly have enjoyed every step of our journey together up until this moment and I anxiously look forward to those to come. I don't wish he were in Kiddy College at Wayne State College...I smile as I remember he and I holding hands - one of the greatest feelings in the world is the precious hand of a child in yours! - as I walked him to class. I don't wish we could start this high school journey over...my heart feels warm as I remember his successes, I feel proud of my son as I remember the adversities he has overcome. Tonight is not a sad ending...it is the celebration of a new beginning! It is now, at this moment, that it is so clear to me; life is about the journey. It is a process. There are highs and their are lows...neither of which define us. It is a privilege, an honor to be Payton's Dad. I have enjoyed every moment of our journey to this point and I look forward to each step from this point forward!

Live In The Moment
How come, with me being the parent, I share things with my son to help him grow and the thing I share with him grabs my heart and transforms my life?!?! Hey, I am the adult here! He is the one that is supposed to be learning.

I shared this with you all a few weeks ago I believe. This thing has grabbed a hold of my heart, challenged my spirit and God is using it to transform my life. Let me share it again real quick and then I will share a few thoughts - This is taken directly from Training Camp: A Fable About Excellence by Jon Gordon:

The best seize the moment because they don’t allow their fear of failure to define them. They know this fear exists, and they overcome it. Their faith is greater than any score, performance, or outcome. Even if they lose, they are still on the path to greatness. And even if they fail, they are one step closer to the perfection they seek.

Ironically, even though the best have a dream and a vision within their sights, it is the journey, not the destination, that matters most to them. The moment is more important than any success or failure. The moment is the success. The moment is the reward.

When the best are in the midst of their performance, they are not thinking “What if I win?” or “What if I lose?” They are not thinking “What if I make a mistake or miss the shot?” They are not interested in what the moment produces but are only concerned with what they produce in the moment. When all eyes are watching, they know that this is the moment they have been preparing and waiting for. Rather than hiding from pressure, they rise to the occasion. As a result, the best define the moment rather than letting them moment define them. To seize the moment, don’t let your failure define you; let it fuel you. Don’t run from fear; face it and embrace it. Don’t let the fear rob you of your love and joy for the game; let it push you into the moment and beyond yourself. Let it inspire you to live and work each day as though it was your last.

Don’t let the moment define you. You define the moment. Define it by knowing that your practice and preparation have prepared you well. Define it with your mental strength, faith and confidence. Define it by knowing that regardless of the outcome, you have given your very best.

Everyone talks about destiny. Everyone searches for it, not realizing that every moment is your destiny. Make every moment of your life count. Realize that this is your one shot, yet don’t focus on the result or the outcome of the shot. Just focus on the shot.

Don’t focus on the past, and don’t look to the future. Success, rewards, accolades, fame, and fortune are merely byproducts for those who are able to seize the moment – not those who look beyond it. Ironically, to enjoy success you must not focus on it. Rather, you must focus on the process that produces success.

You are more than your successes. You are more than your failures. You are who you are in the moment. Enjoy it. Live it. Make the most of it. Make it yours.

 

It's all about the moment...living fully in it, giving yourself fully to it, not focusing on the outcome but rather focusing on the moment. If in fact we will focus on the moment, the outcome will take care of itself. Moms & Dads, is this speaking to your heart like it is screaming at mine? Husbands? Wives? If we will only live in the moment...

 

Speak Victory

I have no idea where they have come from but there have been a few Negativity Gremlins popping up around my house in the last few weeks and it is driving me crazy! One likes to say, "I can't" and another wants to point out how hard everything is all the time. As these Little Gremlins spew their venom it has really made me aware of the little negative things I will say - "I am not smart," "I am not the brightest bulb on the scoreboard," etc. While I am speaking these words in jest, my spirit has convicted me to get rid of them...even if I am kidding. So funny, and no I am not making this up, Speak Life by Toby Mac just came on the radio as I am typing this!!! God has such a great sense of humor!!!

 

The words we speak have great, great power. The thing about words is there is no meaningless or empty word. Every word has power - for life or for death. Yes, yes, I know. I have told Kath several times, "I am only kidding" or "I didn't really mean it." The thing is I spoke it. When we say things over and over again, when we receive them into our hearts, into our spirits they take root and grow. We need to continually cultivate the gardens of our hearts Friends. A misplaced seed can grow and, while it was a joke, something we didn't really mean, it can take root and grow into something that is far from funny.

 

Here is what I want to speak to you, to your life this morning - taking the lyrics directly from The Words I Would Say by Sidewalk Prophets:

 

Be strong in the Lord and never give up hope.

You're gonna do great things I already know

God's got his hand on you so don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget but don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

These are the words I would say

 

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

 

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families!

 

Kev

The Potluck

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that you have had a wonderful week.

This one is going to be short & sweet.

This morning my Beautiful Bride asked me if I wanted to come to the potluck at her work for lunch. I immediately thought of all of the things I had to do, the fact that I was actually planning to write what I thought was going to be this weeks Happy Friday, etc. And then my spirit convicted me. I thought about the fact that she has asked me to come have lunch with her 3 or 4 times in the last month or so...that the Happy Friday I was wanting to write was actually trying to write itself on my heart. So I told her yes, I will come to the potluck. Later, as I was getting ready for work, her sweet little face poked around the corner and with the sweet smile on her face that I have loved for my than 29 years she said, "Are you really coming to lunch with me?" If there were any doubts as to whether or not I had made the right decision - there weren't by the way! - the sweet, beautiful, radiant face communicated loud and clear that I had.

I am keeping this short because YOU have things to do! Where is your potluck? Who is the person that has been wanting some time with you, even if it is only 45 minutes? Think about it. Somebody has been letting you know that they want, perhaps need, just a little bit of your time. Maybe they don't want anything from you, they just want you. Go. Now. I promise you, you will not regret it.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend, don't forget or put off that potluck and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

React or Respond

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that a great week is coming to a close for you.

You know how sometimes you will see something, hear something, reading something and it keeps popping back into your head? I had one of those this week. On Monday or Tuesday I read something and I have thought of it several times since then. I want to share it with you as we close out this great week.

I was reading Be All You Can Be: A Challenge to Stretch Your God-Given Potential by John C. Maxwell. Here is what I read:

"Like the airline pilot, we leaders will often have to deal with disruptions - sometimes very unpleasant disruptions. The issue is whether we respond or react to those disruptions. To react means to act negatively. To respond means to act positively. If you go to your doctor's office, and he prescribes some medicine for you, your body will either react or respond to the medicine. When you come back three days later, the doctor may tell you that your body is reacting to the medicine - he means that your body isn't allowing the medicine to accomplish its purpose. Or he may say that you're responding to the medicine - he means that the medicine is healing your body; you're getting well.

When we have disruptions, do we react or respond? I continually need to remind myself of the importance of responding. People who are schedule oriented, who have their to-do lists, and who have strong goals will always have some tension over disruptions. We have to remember that leadership is more than taking a pen to our to-do lists and marking off numbers. Leadership is meeting needs. I'm afraid sometimes we're marking off numbers instead of meeting needs, and that keeps us from being as effective as we could be.

One key to being an excellent leader is not to let disruption throw you: Handle your disruptions but don't be consumed by them; keep your eyes on the goal. Too many people detour around the need in order to hit the goal, or they meet the need but forget the goal. We have to do both. We must minister to the need as we press on to the goal."

Even as I read again, typing this for you, bits and pieces jump out at me.

• We leaders...
• To react means to act negatively. To respond means to act positively.
• Leadership is meeting needs.
• Too many people detour around the need in order to hit the goal, or they meet the need but forget the goal.
• We must minister to the need as we press on to the goal.

We leaders...Hmmm...Leadership is influence. We all influence others. We ARE all leaders. Oh Boy! If you are breathing, you are a leader. If your life interacts with any other persons life - you have to live permanently in solitary confinement to be excused! :) - you are a leader. Yes Friends, he is writing to us, all of us.

Friends, I have reacted way to many times in my life. I don't want to be a reactor, I want to be a responder. A thought earlier this week on the drive home from working out - we call them first responders, not first reactors. We want them, we need them, when we are in crisis. Yes, I want to be a responder.

The next time our spouses, our sons, our daughters, our friends come to us I pray that we will remember that leadership is meeting needs. I get it, very rarely is their problem - our disruption - convenient for us however perhaps we should remember that it is not about us. Somebody who is looking to us for help needs us. When I was the Athletic Director at MacMurray College in Illinois a terrible tornado tore through our area. The next morning I was driving to work - thankful my house, my family had been spared and listening to the hardships of others. The radio was talking about all of the damage done in surrounding communities - the loss, the hurt. I thought to myself, our athletic department - staff, coaches & athletes - should go help those in need in our communities. Almost instantaneously I thought, "I don't have time for this...I have to much work to do." (My reaction) My spirit, just as quickly convicted me, "These people who have lost their homes probably don't have time for this either." I drove to the office, asked a colleague to send an email out to all staff, coaches & student-athletes asking for volunteers to go work in the community. The work at the office could wait...we served the needs of people that day. (My response)

My goal is to raise God pursuing men who will love, value, cherish & adore their wives. Who will grow to be great Tender Warriors - leading, guiding & protecting their children. Who will seek & pursue the purpose God has for their lives. That is my goal. If I fail to meet their needs - to acknowledge the fear of a baseball, to let them know that I love them regardless of whether the world defines them as a success or a failure, to discipline them when they lie, etc. - I can still hit the goal of growing a boy into a man, at least physically, however I stand no chance of raising a God pursuing, wife honoring, Tender Warrior. The disruptions my Beautiful Bride and sons bring into my life because of their needs are great opportunities to minister deep into their hearts, deep into their souls, deep into their spirits. Whether I react or respond will not only affect them here and now, it will also potentially touch the Haslam family members I may never meet this side of Heaven. 

React or Respond? I choose response. I know that I stand zero chance of accomplishing this on my own...I tried that and failed miserably! As I seek God every day I will pray that He makes me a responder, that my eyes, ears, heart, and yes spirit, will see what He sees, hear what He hears, that I will demonstrate His love, mercy & grace. I might not succeed every time however I will pursue this relentlessly also. I will lean on His love, mercy & grace when I fail and I will daily pursue Him again. Yes, this is what I have decided. How about you?

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

Unconditional

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that you have had an awesome week. Been a blessed week for the Haslam's - we have had our Grammy & Dennis visiting and we celebrated our son Gehrig's 14th birthday.

This week I want to share a few stories with you and then a couple of thoughts.

Nearly 5 years ago, the week he turned 13, our oldest son had a football game. I was one of the coaches - as it turned out the only coach there that day - and we were playing a game on a beautiful Saturday morning. We took the opening kick off and were driving the ball right down the field. We had the ball on the 1-yard line and I had an outside run play called. When the defense lined up without someone over the center I started whistling to get my sons, the QB, attention. He looked over and I changed the play to a QB sneak. The ball was snapped, there was a big pile of bodies and there was a yell - "Ahh!" - from the middle of the pile. The players got up, one by one, and then there was one still laying on the ground...it was my son. I ran out to him on the field and I will never forget how his hurting & scared, big blue eyes looked at me as he said, "Dad, I can't feel my leg." I promise you, I promise, I will never forget the look on his face or the sound in his voice in that moment. It turned out he had dislocated his hip. That night as my Beautiful Bride and I sat in the waiting room for the surgeon to put his hip back in place I prayed and I sent family & friends texts asking for their prayers as well. Back in his room, the anesthesia wearing off, I looked deep into my boys eyes and I told him how much I loved him. I told him that it was good by me if he never played football again and I told him there is nothing he can do to make me love him more or less. I emphasized that he did not have to play football to make his Dad proud. I was a college football coach when he was born and I had stayed in coaching until he was 10-years old. At 5-years old he could draw defenses, at 6-years old he could take a 3 & 5 step drop and from the time he could walk he was my shadow at practice. I wanted to make it perfectly clear to him that he did not have to play football to earn my love, my respect. Reflectively I am sure that moment was more about me than him...I had to say what I said to him that night, the injury provided the opportunity. As a Dad I hoped he would say, "yeah, I am done with this." Instead he listened very respectively, his deep stare matching mine. When I was finished he said, "Dad, you know I am playing football right?" Fine by me boy as long as you know I love you no matter what you do or don't do.

We recently went through a season of growing with Landry, my 8-year old Little Tender Warrior. He was not being honest and it was starting to catch up with him. Right after the start of school this year he made up a pretty big story about how he had found a rock on the playground...we later found out he had taken the rock from the display in his classroom. Having tried to talk to him about the importance of honesty, how it affects relationships, taking away video games and other actions to try to modify his behavior, I honestly did not know what to do this time. I do what I always do when I need to think, I need answers - I went to the gym, got on the cardio equipment and prayed. I begged God to lead me, to lead this little spirit through me, to give me direction...how do I handle this? Landry, going on 4 years now, has professed his desire to be a Navy SEAL. One wall in his room is covered in military flags, stickers, pictures, he has company coins, models, nerf guns, bb guns, cap guns, camouflage shirts, pants, shoes, etc. It became clear to me what we would do as a result of his decision to lie. I went home, my Beautiful Bride and I sat on the bed with Landry and I told him that if he continued to lie, if he was not a man of integrity, he would never fulfill his dream of being a great warrior. I told him that as a result of his decision to lie, and wanting him to understand the consequence of his decisions if this continues, we were going to take away everything military. Landry cried, my heart hurt so bad, my Bride got up and walked out of the room quietly. Landry & Kath went down stairs as I began taking down every picture, putting away every model, taking every piece of clothing, picture, coin...his room was bare. I didn't sleep much that night. One thing kept bothering me; I felt that the punishment was spot on - his character, his integrity is at stake! - however my spirit was convicting me not to go overboard, not to make this about earning something. After all, the God I believe in and I choose to follow, according to the Bible I read, is a God of love, of mercy & of grace. The whole reason He sent His son Jesus Christ to die on the cross is because we - as humans...any of us - could not earn our way, we could not be good enough. The next morning I told Landry I love him, that there is nothing that he could do to make me love him more or less. I also explained that there are consequences for the choices we make. I told him I was going to walk every step of this road with him, that I believe in him and that I will always be willing to help him any way I can.

Last night my 14-year old (Dang it!) had a couple of buddies stay the night for his birthday. He did what we asked him to do while his buddies did what we had asked them not to do. My Bride & I talked to him, explaining to him that when his buddies are over he is responsible for them. I then sent him back downstairs to his buddies, warning as he left, if there was another issue I would be taking both of the boys home...regardless of the time. This morning God and I had a talk about what had happened. My boy had in fact done what we asked. No, he didn't do everything exactly the way I wanted him to do it...heck, I don't do everything the way I want to do it! He hadn't stood up and told the other two boys that they weren't going to do what they were asked not to do...then I remember how hard that is for me to do as well. I write my boy a note. I tell him I love him, I am very proud of him, that I am thankful that he had honored his Mom & I by doing what we asked. I stated that there were some things we need to clean up, however I promised we would work through that together.

Unconditional love...Hard to define. Hard to accept. Extremely hard to give. We all want to be given it and yet it is so hard to give. I don't have all - perhaps I don't have any - of the answers however I want to challenge us with two things:
1. Who in your life needs to know that you love them unconditionally? Will you please tell them today? Will you give them freedom to be who they are, to be all that they are, unencumbered by your expectations...free to be them?

2. Can you, will you, accept that God loves you unconditionally? This can be hard for me sometimes...and it really ties back to the first challenge. You see when I was a little boy I don't remember my Dad ever saying, "You did great!", "I am proud of you!", "there is nothing you can do to make me love you more or less." "You did good" was always followed by "but." I honestly don't recall ever hearing "I am proud of you" until I was a man with 3 boys of my own. I never heard my Dad utter the words, "there is nothing you can do to make me love you more or less." There are two issues: 1. We, as earthly father's, are called to model the love of our Heavenly Father for our children. Are you comfortable with the fact that what they see in us is their view of God? 2. At 46-years old I still battle these things. My Bride asks, "Does everything have to be perfect?" I smile and say that the Bible says, "whatever you do work as though you are working for the Lord, not for man." There is a lot of truth to this driving me however God, the One who judges the heart instead of what is seen on the outside, knows that some of it - especially on days when I am tired - is a little boy still fighting to hear his Dad say, "You did good" without the "but" or once - just once! - "there is nothing you can do to make me love your more or less."

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your precious families. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish those precious families.

Kev

Character

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day!

This week I don't have some profound thought or idea I want to share. This week I want to share a topic with you, present it in a couple of different formats and let you explore what it means to you.

Character - the way someone thinks, feels, and behaves (merriam-webster.com)

Do me a favor, go watch this video. It takes 1 minute and 1 second. Yes, it is a beer ad however the ad has nothing to do with beer really. Please watch it intently, beginning to end...you will understand why. Guinness basketball commercial. - YouTube

Taken from "A Leader's Portrait" by the John Maxwell Company, September 25, 2013.
1) Character
Character gives rise to discipline and responsibility. It's the inward character that enables a person to stand firm. Character is not inherited, nor can it be purchased. It cannot be built instantly, but instead requires years of construction.

Character shows itself in a person's consistency. Jerry West, former Los Angeles Laker and member of the NBA's Hall of Fame, once remarked, "You can't get much done in life if you only work on the days when you feel good." Character gives you the resolve to do what's important, even when it's not convenient.

In addition, character brings respect. When you don't have character within, you won't have respect without. J.R. Miller once wrote: "The only thing that walks back from the tomb with the mourners and refuses to be buried, is the character of a man...What a man is, survives him. It can never be buried."

A few excerpts from "Growing with Jesus: 100 Daily Devotionals" by Andy Holmes:

• It takes a lot of courage to hold out your hand and say "no" when people you really like are begging you to follow along and do something wrong. And though it may not seem like a big deal to join in, it is a big deal. Why? Because you are going against your conscience. That's like slamming a wrecking ball into your heart. The destruction is real, and the wall can only be rebuilt one brick at a time.
• Guess what? Jesus gave you the gift He wanted you to have. The gifts didn't get mixed up or delivered to the wrong people. Christ has given a special gift to you so that you will use it for Him.
• Think about it. Would you like it if someone said ugly things about you?

And finally a few quotes:

• "Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tress is the real thing." - Abraham Lincoln
• "People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built." - Eleanor Roosevelt
• "How true Daddy's words were when he said: all children must look after their own upbringing. Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands." - Anne Frank

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.

Kev

Hit By A Pitch

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that you have had a wonderful week. It absolutely amazes me how time flies! Between 2 boys playing football - on different teams - and another playing baseball, I feel like we are running somewhere all the time. Oh yeah, we are!

Well, this was one of those weeks when I thought I knew what "Happy Friday" was going to be most of the week. Early in the week I read about empowerment, empowering others, etc. I spent a lot of time thinking about and researching empowerment. Yes, empowerment is what this "Happy Friday" was going to be about. And then I went to Landry's baseball game.

Landry is in his first year of "kid pitch." Exciting stuff. He is so excited for each game and he has been hitting very well...one of the benefits of playing baseball with your two older brothers since you can walk! Landry came up to bat in the 1st inning. He fouled one ball off, there were a few balls and then, the pitcher hit him in the back, right below his left shoulder blade. The ball made that hollow "thud" sound that let's you know this one got him good. After a slow walk - I am pretty sure he was debating whether or not it would be o.k. to cry...he decided it wouldn't - he jogged down to 1st base. When he got to the base he turned around and looked at me and gave me the thumbs up. All is good!

The next time Landry came up to bat the pitcher threw the 1st pitch right down the middle of the plate and Landry...backed up. Landry has never backed up but now he did. I encouraged him to get back in there, his coach encouraged him to do the same. Landry eventually got walked - hey, it is the first year of "kid pitch!" The next time he came up to bat the exact same scenario played itself out. First pitch is right down the middle of the plate, Landry backs up, ultimately hangs in there for the other pitches and then ultimately walks. He has been hurt and now it is affecting how he acts, how he plays.

As Landry and I were driving home from the game we talked about him getting hit by the pitch. He confirms that "it really hurt" and that he "wanted to cry. I even got tears in my eyes." I tell him I understand however (at least I said "however' and not "but"!) I try to explain to him that he had to get back in there and take his swings. He looks at me like I am crazy and again explains that it hurt. He also tells me he is scared. I tell him I understand, I love him and I am so proud of him...I don't know what else to say.

This morning I was writing Landry a note. I wanted to encourage him, to help him understand that sometimes we do get hit by pitches but we have to get in there and take our swings. I hurt for him. I don't want him to get hurt, I don't want him to be scared...I want him to play like he always plays, be himself. It was then, at this moment, that it hit me; this is how God feels about us!

Ever been hit by a pitch - I am not just talking about baseball or softball, I am talking about in the game of life? It hurts. You are doing what you love to do and then you catch a fastball - lies, gossip, slander or any number of horrible things people do to each other - right in the middle of the back! For a moment you lose your breath, you want to cry, you put on your brave face, give the thumbs up but your scared. Yeah, all of us have been hit by a pitch at one time or another.

So as a Dad I am looking at my sweet little 8-year old who I love to death. I don't want him to be hurt, I am here for him when he is and I desperately don't want him to let this one, brief moment of pain define him. This is not what baseball is all about, this does not happen all the time and you are going to do so many great things if you will just get back in the batters box and swing the bat. This Friends is how God feels about you and me. He cares when you and I get hurt, He is there for us 24/7 and He doesn't want these moments of pain - the times when we get hit by the pitches of life - to define us. This was so clear to me this morning as I thought about my Little Slugger.

My question/challenge for us this morning, are we going to get up out of the dirt, dig back into the batters box and swinging for the fences? Or have we chosen to bail out every time the pitcher gets ready to deliver the pitch - guaranteeing that we will not get hit - well, actually you could in the first year of "kid pitch" however that's not the point! - but also guaranteeing that we will never get a hit?

Just as I hope, I pray my Little Slugger will overcome this challenge he now faces - it is teaching him life! - I also pray that you and I will do the same. I don't want to minimize at all the hurt, the pain, the fear. However I also refuse to minimize God - the fact that He loves you completely, that He is always there for you and He is hoping you will choose to pursue the greatness He has placed within you and not allow a bad pitch to alter your life course.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families and friends.

Kev

What's Your Brand?

Happy Friday Friends!

I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that a wonderful week is coming to a close for you.

Earlier this week I was dropping my 8-year old little Tender Warrior off at school. As he was getting out of the car I said, "I love you, I believe in you and I am so proud of you." His precious little eyes looked at me and in his little voice he said, "I am proud of you." Those 5 words sunk deep, deep into my spirit.

The Free Online Dictionary (www.thefreedictionary.com) defines authentic as:
1. Conforming to fact and therefore worthy of trust, reliance, or belief
2. Having a claimed and verifiable origin or authorship; not counterfeit or copied

This week I was reading a leadership book and it was speaking about being authentic - as a person, the importance of authenticity, how authenticity builds trust, etc. I then Googled quotes about authenticity to share that day on Twitter & Facebook. It was interesting to me the number of quotes that talked about the importance of authenticity from a business perspective - to establish your brand, so customers will believe in you and your company. The emphasis on being authentic in what we do as opposed to in who we are was paramount to me.

Here is a question for you; are you proud of who you are? Another quote I absolutely love; "would the little boy (girl) you were be proud of the man (woman) you have become?" Just like a precious little 8-year olds words spoke deeply to my spirit - I pray today that I can be the man he thinks I am! - this quote cuts to the core.

Sadly, for many of us, I believe the answer is no. We would not be proud of the men and women we are because we have gotten so, so far away from who we were created - perfectly equipped for great purposes - to be. We have listened to the lies the world has told us, we are trying to be successful from a worldly perspective and, in the process of doing these things, we have veered far from the truth we knew deep in our hearts when we were little children. We can't be authentic if we are trying to be something we are not.

It is interesting to me that we spend so much time trying to prove our authenticity in the things we say and do at work, in the "masks" we put on for others to see when all we really need to do to be authentic is to embrace who we are, who we were created to be and then strive each and every day to be the best we can be. Deep inside your heart, your spirit you know - each one of us knows - who we really are, what are goals, hopes & dreams are, what our values & beliefs are...we know! The unsettled spirit comes from a lack of integrity between those things and the things that we do each and every day. Many of us are worn out and tired, running a race to prove we are something we are not, to only lay our head on the pillow at night and find a restless spirit waiting to talk to us. This is the little boy, the little girl you were waiting for you to slow down enough so he, so she, can finally remind you of who you were created to be, what you knew to be true before you "grew up" and became the man, the woman you are today.

You are not a mistake. You are not flawed. You are not broken. You were created on purpose for a great purpose. You are perfectly equipped to be everything that little boy, that little girl dreamed of being. You may have made mistakes, you might find yourself this morning a long way off the road to where you know you are supposed to be. Please get your eyes off of where you are and catch the precious vision you had as a boy or girl. You can't change the things you have done up until this moment however you can change what is going to happen in the next moment. It is up to you. You only have to answer to yourself and the little boy or little girl who will meet you at your pillow when you lay your head down tonight. While the world will believe the lies you tell/live, he or she never will...even if you die telling and living them.

Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.

Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families and friends.

Kev