I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day and that an awesome week is coming to a close for you!
Yesterday I had lunch with a really neat guy named Ryan. He is 30-years old and he and his wife have a 3-month old baby boy named Brady. He showed me pictures, talked about how he lifts his head, how Brady's trying to push himself up, etc. He loves being a Dad and he is very proud...I get it!
The conversation then took an interesting turn. Ryan started off telling me about the very special relationship he has with his Grandpa. He told me how much his Grandpa means to him, how the very first steps he had taken as a child were when his Grandpa had come into the house and Ryan heard his voice. You could literally see the love and affection that Ryan has for his Grandpa in his eyes, on his face. He then explained that his Grandpa, who is 87-years old, is dying of cancer. It is very important to Ryan that his Grandpa gets to meet his baby boy before he dies. With this, Ryan and his precious little family are flying to Oregon this weekend to go see his grandparents.
Ryan then shared how he is very worried about how Brady will do on the flight. He is worried that he is going to fuss and cry, that he is going to be "that" baby. As we continued to talk and the layers were peeled back Ryan revealed that he and his Bride used to be "those people" who give those new parents with the precious baby the dirty looks when the baby cries. Ahhh, I see. This then spun off an incredible conversation about perspective. Ryan talked about how he never knew he could love someone so much as he loves Brady; that he never knew that what everyone else thinks doesn't matter when something is wrong with Brady, that his only concern is to make sure his son is o.k.; that he never knew how hard it could be to get a baby to quite crying. Of course he never knew any of these things...he had never been a Dad before. His perspective had now changed, he saw things completely differently and he now understood the challenges those parents he had encountered on previous flights - the one's he gave dirty looks because the most precious thing in the world to them was crying - were facing. There was regret for the way he had treated others and fear that he would be treated the same way he had treated others.
Perspective...It really is interesting. What I really don't get is how come we all - generalization alert! I am going to be wrong at some level however you will get the point - feel the need to tell others what they should do, think, feel, believe, etc. You are you, I am me, they are them! We are ALL born with talents, gifts, abilities, faults & inadequacies. The sum of all these things make us the fearfully & wonderfully made people that we are, perfectly equipped - lacking nothing - for the purpose God created us. We are born and raised by people who also have talents, gifts, abilities, faults & inadequacies. They have things at first however that we don't have yet and those things are called experiences. Some of those experiences have been positive, successful and some have been painful, hurtful. The combination of who they are and the experiences they have had shape their perspective(s). They then begin to raise us to the very best of their ability, from their perspective. I could go off an a bigger tangent than I am already on and try to capture what all that means however let me attempt to sum it up this way; unless you were born that person, you have walked every single step of their lives, lived through the exact same experiences they have lived through, etc. you - me, we - don't have the perspective necessary to tell them what they should do, think, feel, believe, etc. You are you, I am me, they are them. I do want to throw this little tidbit in there; the Bible does say that we go through trials & tribulations so we can encourage others who go through the same thing. Please note that it says encourage, not instruct...there is a huge difference.
With perspective I would like to offer us all two challenges:
1. First and foremost let us recognize, realize, respect & live out that everyone has their own perspective. You don't have all the answers, I don't have all the answers, they don't have all the answers. I believe - my perspective - there is only One who has all the answers. All of us are living in a world that is broken and we are all trying to figure it out. Let us be encouragers, not instructors.
2. May I please encourage us all to have humble, teachable spirits? May I please encourage us to recognize, appreciate that we are all on a continuum of life, with different gifts, talents, abilities, faults, inadequacies, experiences? I would also like to encourage us to seek to understand instead of trying to be understood, to learn from each other, to give up the idea of trying to have all the answers, to be open to the idea that someone might know, have experienced something we don't know and to fully embrace life.
Now, there is another word I want to share with you on this beautiful Friday morning. The word is "blessings." This word has been on my mind all week...I have literally thought about this word and my personal countless blessings every single day. I want to encourage you to think about your blessings...and to really count them, to give thanks for them. Yes, there is a reason I chose to talk about perspective first! :)
Now, you might be sitting there thinking "Kev, you have no clue what my life is like! You have no idea the struggles, the trials, the hurt, the pain!" You are absolutely right Friend. I do not have your perspective. Here is what I do know; from someone's perspective you are blessed beyond measure and, if you will allow yourself to have a humble, teachable spirit, you have the opportunity this morning to recognize and truly give thanks for your blessings. I will start with easy to understand examples - if you can see, to the blind person you are blessed. If you can walk, to the lame you are blessed. If you have food in your home, to the starving and homeless, you are blessed. If you have a job that you don't really like, to the jobless you are blessed. If you have a car that you don't really like, to those who can't afford to buy a car you are blessed. If you have an imperfect spouse/partner - by the way, we are ALL imperfect!! - to the lonely, you are blessed. If you have a precious soul who calls you Dad or Mom, to those who long to have a child, you are blessed. See Friends, from my perspective, it is not necessarily about how good things/circumstances/people are but rather it is how we perceive them. I pray that we will all have eyes to see, to truly count, our blessings.
"Be thankful for what you have: you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough." - Oprah Winfrey
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your families. I will always be willing to help you any way I can.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend and please cherish your precious families.
Kev
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