I hope & trust this post finds you all having a great day as a beautiful new day is about to dawn!
This is my 1st Happy Friday from our new home...Yes! We are so very, very blessed! The move went great - moving 4 times in 4 years gives one far to much practice! - and we are well on our way to making this house, a structure, our home. We have already christened it with our first nice dinner and a great family nerf gun fight. Yes Friends, we are truly blessed beyond measure.
On my heart this morning, I can't really tell you why...it has just been gnawing at my heart for the last few days, is a very simple thought with difficult application; you and I are not disqualified. No matter who you are or where you are (physically, mentally, spiritually), no matter what you or have not done, you are not disqualified. Your life has great value, meaning & purpose and God will use you if, and the IF is huge, you will allow Him.
Have you ever intended to do one thing and then did another? Yeah, me too. Crazy isn't it? I will give you a personal example that drives the point home clearly, almost comically. I was bound and determined that this move was going to be "a good thing." I had prayed about it, talked to my Beautiful Bride and Tender Warriors about it...this move is going to be great, we are going to have great attitudes...it is going to be awesome. So it is last Thursday and we are going to close on the house. I have taken the afternoon off from work, we are going to go close on the house and then begin the move. The moving truck is rented, we have a game plan and this is going to be great. About 9:00 a.m. that morning I get a text from Kath that there was a little snag with some of the paperwork and we might not be able to get the keys until 5:00 p.m. There are multiple other communications over the next few hours - we will get the keys, we won't, we may not get the keys until the next day, etc. By the time I leave the office at 12:00 p.m. to head to the closing I have gone from positive, encouraging to negative, frustrated. This has all been planned for a month. I have taken vacation time from work, I organized business travel around this move and now someone typed an email address wrong on paperwork and this prevents us from closing and moving into our house?!?! I recognize that I am not in a good place so I decide I better listen to Christian radio as I drive to the closing...and pray a lot. I wouldn't say I got to a great place by the time I should have arrived - notice the "should have" - however at least I hadn't gotten worse. Then...I got lost on the way to the closing. This led to a phone call with my Girl where I was less than a great man or husband...actually, I was pitiful. I am now very frustrated & agitated...I have gone from happy, positive & encouraging to this pathetic state in 4 hours! So I park my car, get out and our realtor walks out the door. Me, the guy who has told everyone how great this move is going to be, the guy who has prayed this up, doesn't say "hi" or "good afternoon" or any other kind, positive or encouraging word. No, I look right at him and say, "who is responsible for this?!" And in an instant, I realize I have failed in this moment. I have allowed circumstances, things completely beyond my control, to determine my attitude, the influence I would have on others.
Have you ever had a season or a moment like that? The reality is we all do. Let me say that again Friends and let these words settle deep into your heart & spirit; WE ALL DO. We all have failing moments however this does not mean you are disqualified.
Many times when I have been asked to give a motivational speech or to preach a sermon at a church I have felt completely unqualified. How can I, a man who has failing moments like the one listed above, stand in front of others and offer encouragement, inspiration, share the word of God? I feel, I am, so inadequate. Interestingly as I have read books, listened to other speakers, etc. I have found I am not alone. What I have actually found is that I would be alone if I didn't have these moments. We are all flawed, broken people and as such, we are going to have flawed, broken moments. This however does not define you or I, the Lord does that. I have read & heard numerous leaders whom I consider to be great, Godly men & women share stories similar to mine. One woman, who has a written many books and has a wonderful ministry, has shared stories about huge meltdowns in her home as she is getting ready to go to speaking engagements. I have heard a man who serves in marriage ministries talk about having huge arguments with his wife as they traveled to the very marriage conferences where they are going to talk to other couples about what a Godly marriage looks like. The funny thing about that story was when he said it the other men on the radio with him, who also serve in the ministry with him, stated they experience the same thing. Not one of them talked about this perfect, pristine life, marriage or relationship that qualified them to speak at these conferences.
A few thoughts:
- We all have failing moments & seasons in life. These do not define or disqualify you.
- You are not alone. We are all so good at hiding "stuff." The reality is you would be alone if you were perfect, had it all figured out, never made a mistake, etc.
- Get over yourself & your mistake. Don't get caught in the trap of beating yourself up mercilessly over your latest - it won't be the last - mistake. Recognize it, take personal responsibility for it, apologize if you have hurt or offended others, determine what you can do differently next time to prevent it and move on. If you do not do these things you can wind up in a vicious cycle of regret that can last years or tragically, even a lifetime.
- Never give up. There will be detractors, perhaps none greater than in your own head. A moment or season does not define you. Until you have taken your last breath it is not over and you can choose how you will behave and respond - not react - in the next moment. Keep fighting for you - the man, woman, husband, wife, Dad, Mom that God has created you to be!
- God will use your life if you will allow Him. It isn't about your latest blow up, fit or struggle. It is what God wants to do in others lives through you. It is God that touches the heart of others, not you. He may use your words or actions as a way to communicate to others however please keep in perspective what is happening. It is not about you, it is about God. If He puts you in a position to influence others, He will use that time as He wants, regardless of you.
- I would strongly encourage you to seek God's leadership, guidance & direction for your life. Life is a struggle, a battle, one that you & I will surely lose if we live in our own knowledge, wisdom, strength & courage. Walk in God's love, mercy & grace. He created each one of us on purpose for a purpose. Find rest, leadership, guidance & direction in Him Friends.
Have a great day, a wonderful weekend & please cherish your precious families.
Kev
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