Happy Friday, Friends!
I hope and trust this post finds you all having a great day as a glorious new day begins to dawn in My Sweet Home, Alabama!
One week until the college football season is here! Let's go!!!
What a treat and blessing! Earlier this week, my Beautiful Bride, Kathy, walked up to me and said, "I have this week's Happy Friday." There was only one appropriate response: "Yes ma'am." You all are going to enjoy this great message and the wisdom within it.
Always Have a Quarter in Your Pocket
When my boys were little, I felt so overwhelmed at times, and most of the time my answer was “no.” Then one day I had a strong conviction. We were at one of our favorite Mexican restaurants, and there stood this gigantic bubblegum machine. As my youngest stood there, with his tender, big blue eyes dancing, he looked up to me, and of course, asked for a quarter. I had none, and at times I just said, "You don’t need one." His sweet face dropped, his smile faded, and he moved on to the next thing. At that moment, getting a piece of bubble gum was everything to him. Just like the things that are everything to me when my eyes would dance at new shoes, new clothes, new jewelry, etc. This is when I made a vow to always have a quarter for the bubble gum machine for any of my three boys. Even to this day, he is grown now, whenever we see a bubble gum machine, he looks at me and smiles. It has just become a great memory for both of us.
It is so easy, as moms, for “no” to become our default response instead of a thoughtful one. We carry the responsibility. At times, we say “no” for good reason: to protect, to guide, to teach. Or “no,” not now. No, that’s not good for you. At times, no’s are necessary, but don’t let them become a habit. Our children need joy, laughter, and reassurance, and to be seen and cherished, not just discipline and structure.
Sometimes the important things, the small things in life, are sometimes the biggest things in life. As a mom of young children, I sometimes found it easier to say no, but I want to encourage you to choose connection over convenience. To this day, my youngest and I are connected all because of a simple coin, a quarter.
Guess what? The requests for bubble gum are gone; my house is quiet; no more car rides. I do not remember every rule I enforced, but I sure do remember the times we laughed together, the lunch dates, getting bubble gum, and all the smiles it brought to his face. I miss those days.
There is something small about a quarter. It's just loose change, but in the eyes of a child, that quarter can feel like a treasure. It can mean a moment of joy as you look into a bubble gum machine at a bright blue piece of gum.
At times, I wish I had paused more while raising my boys and asked, “Is this a moment that really needs a no or a chance to say yes?”
A quarter for a piece of bubble gum isn’t about too much sugar or saying you don’t need that. It's about being present in the moment of what's important in your child's life. It shows us to slow down. It's about recognizing that my boy's childhood was made up of tiny, spontaneous moments. These moments may be insignificant to us as parents, but they become the stories our children carry with them for a lifetime.
Our Father in Heaven has the heart of a good, patient Father. He delights in giving His children good gifts. Not out of obligation, but out of love. As parents, we need to strive to reflect that same heart.
We get so busy raising our children, making sure homework is done, baths are taken, etc. I did this. God reminds me every day that love is often found in the small things, and the most meaningful lessons are wrapped in the simplest moments. Or a wrapped piece of bubble gum. A simple yes might just be the best yes, you can give to your child.
So, to wrap this up, always have a quarter ready. Not just in your pocket but in your heart. This taught me to have more patience, to have more grace, to take more time to know what's important to my child. Did I always get this right? Absolutely not. Choose the memory, not the no. It might just change your world.
“Life is not measured by the number of breaths that you take, but the moments that take your breath away.” – Maya Angelou
“It's not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” – Abraham Lincoln
Please don't hesitate to contact me if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. I will always help you any way I can. You can reach me at kevin@whatwillyourinfluencebe.com.
Have a great day and a wonderful weekend. Please cherish your precious family, be kind, and stay well!
Kev
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